35
I f I remain in this position much longer, I’ll permanently imprint onto the mattress.
Amelia frowned. Lying still or strolling about – she couldn’t avoid thinking about Mikhail. It was time to accept she needed him, and not just because he was the only one who could give her the ring. Without him, this place felt empty – like a shell without its heart.
She craved to tell him everything that had transpired inside the temple. How she flushed every time she recalled her failure to prove herself as the Oracle, but also how a small sense of pride filled her chest, knowing she had at least taken action.
Amelia got up from the bed and drifted out of her room, with no particular destination in mind. She soon found herself outside Viktor’s lab. With no autopsies being scheduled for today, she figured he would be there.
When she entered, he was leaning against a table, hands holding the book he was reading. Messy black hair fell across his face as he focused on the pages.
“Hey.” Amelia approached with caution.
Viktor glanced up from the book. “Hey. How are you?”
“Good…”
This time, he gave her a more thorough look. His brow furrowed, and he closed the book, setting it aside. “Do you need to talk?”
“If I’m not interrupting…”
Viktor shook his head. “I’m not doing anything urgent. I was trying to dig up more information about that Horned God, but all I’ve found out is that it’s a deity venerated solely by the Beduin tribe.”
Amelia shivered at the memory of the horned face carved into the cliffs. It made sense that Viktor, given his scientific curiosity, had already looked into it. “They must have their own distinct religion, then.”
“You’d be amazed at how many religions exist in the immortal world.”
Amelia’s gaze wandered over the polished surface of the bench, and she leaned against it, facing Viktor.
“You mentioned all these religions… Is one of them centred around the Creator? Is he a god, or just a being with unimaginable power? Does he even exist, or he was just a figment of my imagination?”
Viktor shrugged. “Some believe there are many gods and give them different names, while some stick to the belief that all gods are actually one – creator . Which one you have met is something you must figure out on your own, however.”
Amelia’s skin prickled at the possibility of running into the Creator once more since the life-changing impact of their last encounter. “Have you ever met a god?”
“Not that I’m aware of.” His lips tilted into a faint smile.
“How are you holding up after nearly being burned at the stake?” she asked.
Viktor took a moment, contemplating. “Two months ago, I probably would’ve lost my mind, but now I’m all right.
Except for being furious with Alex for her reckless behaviour.
She may be seventy years old, but she’s still a child at heart, and that’s my fault.
I tried too hard to protect her from everything, and in doing so, I kept her from the experiences she needed to mature.
Her brother, Grigor, grew up quickly – maybe because he’s a man, and I wasn’t as overprotective with him. ”
The softness in the lycanthrope’s voice every time he spoke about the twins warmed Amelia’s skin. “You must really love them.”
“One of the most foolish things you can do as an immortal is allow yourself to love. And I’m one of those fools who, no matter how many times they get hurt, still needs to love someone,” Viktor said.
“Love has been the root of most of the troubles in my life. It has more than once led me to Vaka Hara. Yet, the irony is, it’s the only thing that has ever been capable of pulling me out of it. ”
A heaviness settled in Amelia’s chest. “Is that why most creatures avoid romantic relationships?”
The lycanthrope gave a nonchalant shrug. “Life is about survival. The longer you live, the longer you need to endure. And it’s easier to survive when you don’t have weaknesses.”
His words made her straighten up. “You think love is a weakness? Let me tell you something – I never felt as weak as I did in those three years after my family died. Before that, I had something to hold on to. After that, I had nothing. I would argue that was a worse fate than having a family to love.”
“Yet, if you keep living like that, after a while, you’ll find that you need nothing. Loneliness teaches you to be self-sufficient.”
“But it’s never been enough for you, has it?”
A shadow passed over Viktor’s face. “That’s why I’m weak, Amelia. I’m hardly the right person to give you advice on surviving.”
His last words stung even more than his belief about love.
“Mikhail never thought of you as weak,” she said.
Viktor’s smile was crooked this time. “Mikhail has seen me in too many vulnerable moments to think of me as anything but weak.”
Viktor wasn’t just a friend to Mikhail. He was one of his most trusted advisors. But there was no way to convince Viktor of that, so Amelia chose to shift the conversation. “Will you tell me how you and Mikhail met?”
“Of course.” Viktor’s brow furrowed in thought. “Before I can even explain that, you need to learn some of my past, so you can understand all that Mikhail did for me. You know about what I lost…”
Amelia nodded, swallowing back her condolences. She didn’t wish for Viktor to take it as another sign they deemed him weak.
“After that time, I was lost. Surrendering to Vaka Hara was my only way out,” he said. “It was then that Raphael, my saviour, found me. He was a doctor, by the way.”
“A doctor? So, this was after the Changes in 1744?”
“No, no. This was before that. Raphael was human. But don’t let that mislead you.
Yes, he lacked extraordinary physical traits or a secondary form, and he aged like any other mortal, but his mind – that was his true power.
At thirty years old, he knew more about the world than most creatures do in a thousand years.
He mastered medicine, pharmacy, astrology…
He could even see into the future. But such gifts come at a price.
Catherine de’ Medici wanted him to teach her occult powers, and he denied her.
One night, her guards came and took him away. I never saw him again.”
Amelia gasped. “ The Catherine de’ Medici?”
Viktor’s expression darkened. “Yes, the very same. To this day, I regret not avenging him. But that was Raphael’s wish.
He made me promise not to seek vengeance.
Perhaps he feared that if I did, I’d spiral back into Vaka Hara, and he had gone to great lengths to pull me out of it.
In the end, I didn’t avenge him…” Viktor’s lips pressed together.
“Was Raphael the one who gave you the tattoo that covers the valknut on your back?”
Viktor nodded. “Raphael helped me move past the loss that the valknut constantly reminded me of. But he never taught me how to deal with the loss of him…”
Amelia regretted asking the question, seeing how it dredged up painful memories.
She was ready to change the subject, but Viktor spoke again.
“A few years after I heard that the queen regent had executed Raphael, I left Lyon with no real purpose. I don’t even remember how I ended up in Paris…
I just continued to exist, believing that somehow, my endurance would have pleased Raphael.
I even made some new acquaintances, but I never really let anyone get close.
In truth, I was miserable. I wasn’t in Vaka Hara, but in a place far worse.
If there was a rock bottom to living, I was buried beneath it.
“I can’t recall the exact year, but it was the late seventeenth century.
At that time, I was still in Paris, though saying I lived there would be an exaggeration.
It was more like I was merely existing…” He paused, his gaze fixed on the floor.
“I hadn’t eaten in two weeks, and for a lycanthrope, meat is crucial for survival.
I believed that if I starved myself, my body would grow too weak to transform.
“That’s when I decided to end my life. For a creature like me, death doesn’t come easily.
I had already stopped eating, but my body’s resilience made death a long, agonising process.
It could have taken years – maybe five, ten, even twenty…
And I couldn’t wait any longer. I carried a deadly force inside me, one I was barely managing to control.
I needed a more certain end. Decapitation.
Someone had to sever my head. But finding someone for that task was far more difficult than I expected.
“The problem was, if the wolf within me sensed the threat of imminent death, it would have taken over, causing more bloodbaths. And I didn’t want to kill anyone anymore. All I wanted was an end. So, I searched for an immortal strong enough to hold the wolf back during the beheading.”
Amelia remained still, absorbing every word.
“Unfortunately for me,” Viktor said with a wry smile, “I wandered for days and didn’t find a single immortal.
Then, I met Mikhail. It was evening, and I was slumped against a wall when I saw him walking down the street.
His clothes were fine and immaculate, and his presence required attention.
To a regular human, he must have seemed like a wealthy, striking man, but I could smell the manticore on him, even with my dulled senses.
I knew this was my chance. An immortal and a manticore.
If anyone could take on the wolf and end me, it would be him.
Before I could figure out how to approach him, he walked into a nearby cabaret. ”
Amelia raised an eyebrow. “Mikhail went into a cabaret?”
“Don’t imagine some grand dance show.” Viktor waved his hand. “Back then, cabarets were just taverns with alcohol and harlots.”
Amelia barely kept her jaw from dropping. Was it right to feel jealous of things that had happened in the seventeenth century?