Chapter 13
Anchor
Shock completely fills me as my stomach drops, her words swimming, deafening me, while my dad grips my arm trying to keep me up but my knees are weakening by the minute with her confession.
Fuck, no, no, no…
While I’ve been trying to move on with my life, she was…
Fuck, please, no.
“Nineteen months,” she whispers though it sounds like she fucking screamed them, “I was hit from behind and woke up in a cage naked, nineteen months ago, Five hundred and eighty one days ago.”
Bile builds, the need to vomit, is consuming me as Dad chokes, “Fuck she’s been counting every day.” but I ignore him and squeeze my eyes shut, her confessions making it hard to breathe.
She was pregnant, three times, she fell pregnant, three times had a baby kicked outta her, three fucking times.
“Can you explain that day for me, sweetheart?” Doc asks quietly, and I look just as she flinches and tighten her arms around her knees as her body trembles, and I, fuck, I can’t stand back and watch this. Doc said I needed to, but I can’t.
I take a step forward, but I’m back as another hand clamps onto my other shoulder, and my jaw ticks.
Summer doesn’t look up, she keeps her eyes downcast as she whispers, “I’d just gotten off the phone with Eric. He was mad at me because I told him I was walking home, he-he told me he loved me without even realizing, and I felt so happy.”
Her tears fall and that does it, I shove the hands off me and walk over to where Doc and Summer are.
Doc gives me a nod in understanding as I kneel before my girl and slowly hold my hand out. She flinches, noticing it, fucking killing me until she looks up and sees that it is me and confusion swim in her beautiful eyes.
“Eric,” she whispers, like she can’t believe I’m here.
“I meant it,” I admit, my voice raw, “I wanted to take you out for a ride and tell you at the lake. You just frustrated me because I knew women, men, kids, were disappearing and I said it without realizing then was pissed at myself for saying it that way… but I meant it, sunshine.”
Her tears fall as she slowly lifts her trembling, bruised, cut, hand and places it in mine causing the spark I always felt, the tingling sensations to run up my arm, and my tears fall as she confesses, “I’m not very sunshiny anymore…”
“You will be again, I’ll make sure of it.” I promise, and she lets out a sob, and I squeeze her hand tighter.
“He attacked me, Eric,” she admits, “After you hung up, he attacked me outside of Clark’s and I-I didn’t…”
Her breathing picks up, and I whisper, “I’m here, baby, I’m right here.”
She looks at me, our eyes locking. She confesses, “I managed to get away from him and I knew I had to get to you, so I ran, but then you-you were…” I flinch, the memory what I did flashing and she diverts, “Anyway, after I saw you with that woman, I knew you took the situation the wrong way, I knew you drove past and wanted to get revenge. I needed to try and get my head around everything before I confronted you when Amber messaged…”
“Who’s Amber?” I hear my dad ask and Dirty answers, “Her mother, who wasn’t involved until after her dad died.”
“She said she spoke to my lawyer and even though I knew she was lying, I still went to the apartment, my head was all over the place and I wasn’t thinking straight.
When I walked inside she was bent over and Gabriel was screwing her from behind and I laughed, I thought it was hilarious, mainly because I had broken his nose.
” She says, her eyes clouding over and I tighten my grip on her hand to keep her with me.
“She wanted me with him,” she admits, her eyes becoming clearer as we lock eyes, “I never told you, but she pushed for me to date him, and I guess at that point I just wanted her affection. I never slept with him, never kissed him. She wanted my inheritance.”
“What happened after that, sweetheart?” Doc asks, “After you laughed at them?”
Her eyes cloud again and she whispers, “Amber said it was time I paid my dues for her giving birth to me and I was knocked out,” her body trembles, “When I came too, I was naked, in a cage before I was dragged out by Hanz, the leader and he tore my virginity from me while his men watched and laughed. I became number two after that…”
My stomach drops, and my pain filters through me. The bile that wanted to come up builds higher and higher as I feel a presence behind me, and Summer pulls her hand back and chokes, “Please don’t hurt me…”
“I won’t hurt you, darling,” Ace whispers as he kneels beside me, and my tears fall, seeing her come apart from her trauma.
“That’s what they used to say to the kids,” she chokes, her breathing becoming choppy, his presence too much for her, “I watched them tear them from the cages, I heard their screams of terror and pain, I-I, I, oh god, I watched a teenager strangle herself to death because she didn’t want to live anymore. ”
“Fuck,” I hear Stone choke, and I whisper, “Summer, baby,” as I reach out to touch her but she’s too far gone, and her eyes roll back as she passes out, her breathing too erratic as she slumps against the wall.
“Shit, Doc,” Ace snaps as he stands, and Doc murmurs, “She’s passed out, she’s okay, her breathing is regulating again.”
I stare, completely numb, at my girl who is slumped against the wall, hating myself more and more as Ace gently picks her up bridal style, her head limping to the side as he takes her to my bed while I stay sitting still with my heart in my throat, the need to tear this room apart pulling me.
“Eric,” Doc whispers, but I don’t look at him, I don’t even flinch.
Nineteen months she was in that cage, being raped several times a day, nineteen months...
I now understand Trigger's mindset —I really fucking do.
“Anchor is to be put on watch until further notice,” Trigger snaps when I don’t say anything or even move, and I can’t fucking say anything because I don’t blame him.
“Agreed,” Stone mutters, and I choke, “I need to be alone with Sum, please.”
I’m about to fall apart, and I don’t need them to see it.
Doc squeezes my shoulder in support and stands while everyone files out, and he states, “The door stays open, a prospect will be outside.”
I don’t say anything, don’t refute, instead I wait for them to leave before I’ll move, before I’ll face my reality, of my fuck up.
I know if I had confronted Summer, then this wouldn’t have happened to her. I just fucking know it because the fucker would be dead already. I would have seen the situation for what it was and would have killed him.
What the fuck have I done?
As soon as I hear footsteps in the distance, I wipe my face with my hand and slowly stand, then turn to face my girl, curled up on my bed where Ace placed her.
Her chest rising and falling slowly, and my chin trembles as I stumble over to her and kneel before her as I grip her hand and drop my head, my sobs tearing out of me, my body shaking.
I really fucking messed up, and now she’s got to live with so much trauma she won’t want to survive. She’ll want to kill herself. I just fucking know it, and that thought brings my sobs out harder.
What have I done?
I need to ride, fuck, I-I need… I need to compose myself before she wakes back up.
Trying to control my sobs, I press her hand against my lips and I choke, “I love you, sunshine, so fucking much, and I promise you, I’ll help you heal, I’ll show you how fucking sorry I am for taking that situation wrong, for not fighting for you, for us.”
I press another kiss to her hand as I look over her face, even passed out, not looking relaxed.
What have I fucking done…
Trembling, I slowly stand up, wiping my face before I turn and leave the room, coming face-to-face with Trigger, his eyes red, not surprised to see him outside of my room, but I ignore him and walk towards the side door, bypassing the common room and everyone in there.
I speed-walk over to my bike, which the prospects brought back, and climb on before starting her up, revving her, and spinning out of my spot. Willie, the prospect, just opens the club's gates in time for me before I hit them, and I drive down the road, picking up my speed.
Fifty, sixty, seventy, eighty, ninety, one hundred —my speedometer increases. The image of Summer cowering in the cage, bloodied and bruised, knocks me for six, making me go quicker just as a bike pulls to my left, then my right and I notice Trigger and Tank keeping with me.
I pay them no attention and pick up my speed, needing this before I face the music, before I face my girl’s terror and hope and fucking pray I can save her from them, from herself before she, fuck…
I cannot live without her, I’ve been trying and failing, I need her and if she leaves me, I’ll follow her.