Chapter 46
Lizzy
The days following the attack pass in a blur.
We attended the funeral for Nik and the memorial following events in honor of him.
I made my peace with his passing, and since then, have been trying to be there for Katerina, but we’re not very close, and she’s struggling in her own way. So, here I am, baking muffins for her.
I know they have a chef, but I figured a home-cooked meal could help cheer her up.
And baking has been cathartic for me. I considered finding a therapist after the events that occurred, but I think they’re mandatory reporters, and I’m not sure how I could get help while also not admitting to everything that happened.
Bash caught me researching therapeutic techniques and did his own research on therapy.
Now, he’s acting as my therapist. He ensures we go on our runs and do things that bring me joy.
Despite the horror that occurred, I feel safer than I have been in years knowing my past is gone.
No one will ever come for me again. Bash will ensure it.
He’s also taken it upon himself to teach me how to properly shoot a gun despite my protests. I have no good memories related to the weapon, but I do it to appease him. He worries about my safety nonstop and feels as though he failed me, which is ridiculous.
“It smells so good in here,” a deep voice moans from behind me, followed by a stomach growling.
“Not for you!” I warn my salivating boyfriend as I turn to face him. When he wraps his arms around my waist, I bring mine around his neck.
“Hey, angel,” he murmurs then presses his lips against my forehead in a quick kiss. Leaning down, he tucks his head in the crook of my neck, and inhales deeply. At first, I’m blushing at the notion, then I realize he’s sniffing the dessert, not me.
Slow movement behind me draws my attention, and I break away just in time to see him shoveling half a muffin into his mouth. I swat his hand, but I’m too late. The rest of the blueberry muffin disappears between his lips.
“This is not for you!” I chastise him, showing no mercy, even as his face crumbles.
He stares at me in disbelief, but underneath it, there’s a hint of mischief. “But you made so many!”
“Doesn’t matter.”
“Shouldn’t I be carb-loading for our long run tomorrow?” He raises a brow as though he’s caught me, and the move alone has my insides fluttering. Damn him for being so sexy.
“You can make us pasta for dinner.” I grin as I give him the order teasingly, but we both know there’ll be pasta ready by sundown. He doesn’t know how to tell me no, and I don’t think he’d want to anyway.
“Yes, ma’am,” he says with a wink, then leans down. I meet his kiss, but this time, I swat the muffin he’s sneaking out of his hands before it can clear the counter.
“Gotcha!”
He gazes longingly at the pastries on the counter. If I hadn’t witnessed him eating a large breakfast this morning, I’d be convinced he was starved. “Can you at least save a few for us?”
“Us or you?”
“What’s mine is yours,” he says sweetly.
I roll my eyes. “That’s not true. We aren’t even married.”
“Don’t tempt me.” The twinkle in his eyes tells me he’s not entirely joking. I haven’t given marriage much thought, but now, I know my future is that of Mrs. Lizzy Montclair. “You know you’re my beneficiary, right?”
My head whips in his direction, all thought of the future vanishing. “You’re joking,” I demand, mouth agape.
“Why would I be joking?”
“I–” Pausing, I think it over. “Actually, I’m not surprised. When did you do that?”
“When I moved here.” He grins and pecks my lips. “You’re my perfect angel, and my future always led to you, Lizzy. I love you.”
“I know you do,” I cheekily respond to his declaration, earning me a glare.
“Lizzy,” he warns me in a firm tone.
I laugh, then amend my statement. “I love you too, Bash.”
“Much better,” he says through kisses. “Now, what’s on the calendar for today?”
“It’s my second-to-last day of PTO. I go back to the zoo the day after tomorrow. I’m planning on just relaxing.” The thought of anything laborious rolls my stomach.
“How do you feel about going back?” he asks softly, concern lacing his words.
“It’s going to be weird. Even though Nik was only with me a couple of weeks, it was nice having a friend there with me. I’ll miss him,” I confess, finally able to speak of him without tearing up.
“You’re doing really well. It’s okay to be sad as long as you don’t let it consume you.”
I swallow hard, then promise him, “I won’t.”
When I nod, he starts picking up dirty dishes and washes them in the sink. I eye him, somehow finding the domestic act of washing dishes attractive when he does it. I slink over to him and wrap an arm around his waist.
“This is entirely selfish,” he tells me in a teasing tone.
I jab a finger into his side, causing him to jump. “Hoping if you help, you’ll be entitled to a muffin?”
He brightens at the suggestion, as though it’s plausible. We both know he’s going to get his fair share. “No, but that’s a good idea.”
“Then what’s your motivation?”
“I have a new game for us to try. The quicker the kitchen is cleaned, the sooner we can play.” He’s like a child on their birthday excited to use their new presents. But the competitive streak in me has me cleaning just as quickly as he is.
“You’re on.”
We spend the rest of the afternoon battling each other, caught up in our game of intellect. It’s the perfect way to get out of my head, and he knows it. He planned it perfectly. Just like he does for everything with me. My perfect man.