Chapter 3
HALLE
Usually, I wasn’t one for believing in miracles. But as my chauffeur-driven Rolls-Royce pulled into the grounds of the Love Hotel in California, which was based near fancy Malibu, I was convinced they were real.
Less than a month ago I was freaking out about the fact that my aversion to emails and answering phone calls had led me to miss out on my big chance to secure a place at this world-renowned matchmaking hotel. And now, I was here.
It hadn’t been easy though. Ironically, I’d spent the weekend bombarding them with emails, begging them to give me another chance. Then on Monday morning I’d called head office to apologise for not responding sooner.
Just when I was about to offer to name my firstborn child after whoever took pity on me and gave me a place, they confirmed that I was in.
I’d screamed down the phone louder than an excited hyena, but thankfully the lady on the other end understood my enthusiasm. And now that I was here, I could see my elation was totally justified.
As the driver cruised down the enormous driveway, my eyes popped. The word ‘luxury’ didn’t even begin to cover this place.
The huge white stone building looked like a modern palace.
It was flanked with lush palm trees and in front of the hotel was an impressive circular water fountain which had a white marble statue of a couple kissing under a gold umbrella, so it looked like they were locking lips in the rain.
The woman even had her foot popped – just like that iconic scene in The Princess Diaries. So romantic.
The car stopped, the suited and booted chauffeur got out and opened the door. As I slid off the backseat and stepped outside, the sunshine instantly warmed my skin.
I closed my eyes and inhaled the delicious salty sea air, thinking it was a billion times better than the smell of rubbish, pollution and stale piss that hit me when I left my apartment building this morning.
Just as I was marvelling at how blue the sky looked and taking in a glimpse of the beach and the ocean I spotted in the distance, I saw a woman in a branded Love Hotel uniform, with long, curly pink ombré hair, light brown skin and a wide smile walking towards me.
‘Halle?’ she asked and I instantly noticed that she had a British accent.
‘That’s me!’ I replied.
‘Welcome to the Love Hotel, California! I’m Sammie, your Love Alchemist.’
‘My what?’
‘Your Love Alchemist, which is basically a silly way of saying I’m the person responsible for helping you and your match fall in love.
Oops, I didn’t mean “silly”. I take the hotel’s job titles very seriously.
They’re just a bit weird, that’s all. Not weird.
Different. Interesting. Shit. I’m making a right pig’s ear of this welcome!
And now I just swore!’ She slapped her forehead.
‘Sorry. I’m a bit nervous. I’m new to the job.
That doesn’t mean I’m not good at it though, because I totally am.
Not that I’m being big-headed. I was just trying to reassure that you’re in good hands. ’
‘You’re fine!’ I laughed. ‘It’s lovely to meet you, Sammie.’ I stretched out my hand. She went to shake it, then paused.
‘Wow! Your nails are stunning!’ She dipped her head to admire them.
Pride bloomed in my chest. I’d painted my thumbs, forefingers and little fingers a vibrant orange shade and the two fingers in the middle were a nude shade with a cute orange daisy design in the centre.
‘Thanks! So you’re British? That’s a nice surprise.’
‘Yeah, there’s a few of us here. Jasmine, one of the Love Empresses, is from London like me.’
‘Love Empress? You’re right. The job titles here are weird!’ I laughed and her face fell. ‘But in a totally interesting and very cool way.’
‘Phew! Thank God you’re nice. I don’t want to get reported to management for slagging off the job titles with one of my first guests! Let me get you checked in.’
Sammie led me through the grand reception. It had immaculate black and white chequered flooring, a grand sweeping gold staircase, plush white sofas and an enormous colourful floral display nestled on a large white marble table.
Soothing acoustic music played softly in the background, which instantly made my shoulders loosen and the ginormous windows along the back wall boasted floor-to-ceiling panoramic ocean views.
Wow.
This place was the closest I’d ever been to paradise. I couldn’t wait to get outside and sink my feet into the gorgeous golden sand.
‘So,’ Sammie said, ‘are you excited about meeting your match?’
‘Yep! I hardly slept last night. I can’t wait to find out who it is.’
‘He hasn’t arrived so I haven’t met him yet, but I know you’ll be blown away.’
‘Really?’ My eyes widened with anticipation.
‘Yeah! Everyone is… No, I’d better not say any more for now. But a lot of people would kill to be set up with him.’
‘Oh, wow! No pressure for me then.’
‘You’ve got nothing to worry about, hon! You’re freaking gorgeous. He’s lucky to be matched with you too.’
‘Thanks. Let’s hope he agrees.’
Once I’d completed check-in, Sammie gave me the grand tour of the resort. It was so big that we did it on one of those golf cart buggies.
Apparently, the management had spent ages searching for the right plot of land. They wanted an amazing secluded beach location that was close to popular locations like Malibu and Los Angeles, but that’d give them the space they needed to create a dream resort which offered both privacy and luxury.
There were two large swimming pools, three restaurants, a huge spa and the beach had some of the softest-looking sand I’d ever seen. It was straight out of a high-end travel magazine.
Considering how plush the surroundings were, I shouldn’t have been shocked when I saw how incredible my huge room was.
It had white solid oak furniture, a sea blue, grey and white colour scheme and a ginormous king-size bed with expensive-looking crisp white bed linen and gold-trimmed pillows.
I couldn’t wait to sink into that mattress tonight.
Modern beach-inspired art adorned the walls. The bathroom had a massive rainfall walk-in shower. There was even a remote-controlled toilet. Wow. Even flushing the loo was fancy here.
And when I opened my grand balcony doors I was treated to stunning unobstructed ocean views. No wonder it cost so much to come here.
Once I’d showered, I started to get dressed. I was meeting my match at eight-thirty, which was in less than an hour.
Vanessa had asked me to call once I was ready. So after doing my hair and make-up, which took longer than expected, and sliding into a knee-length orange patterned summer dress to match my nails, I hit the video call button.
‘Hey!’ she said as she appeared on the screen. ‘Loving the eye make-up and your hair is on fleek!’
‘Thanks, but you know no one says on fleek any more, right?’
‘No?’ She frowned. ‘What are the cool kids saying these days then?’
‘You’d have to ask one of them. I’m thirty-four, so I have no idea.’
‘You’re a baby! I’m forty-one and still consider myself young, so compared to me, you’re fresh out the womb! Anyway, you look amazing! How you feeling? What’s it like there? And when do you meet your Mr Right?’
‘My stomach’s churning so much it could turn milk into butter! As for this place, it’s off the scale.’
I described the surroundings to Vanessa and she oohed and aaahed before asking me to send her photos.
‘You know I don’t do the whole pictures thing. I prefer to be in the moment.’
‘Being in the moment is all well and good if you’ve got a photographic memory. But how are you going to remember what food you ate if you don’t take pictures? Or how beautiful the sunset was?’
Vanessa was one of those people that took a dozen photos of her dessert before she took a single mouthful. No judgement because once upon a time, before the shit hit the fan, I did too. But not any more.
‘Everyone’s become a slave to their phone. They’re obsessed with taking and posting photos without giving a second thought to the consequences…’ My stomach tightened as a painful memory shot into my head.
‘I hear you. Sorry. I’m just so used to taking photos that sometimes I forget about what you went through.’
‘It’s okay. I overreacted. I know you’re just curious to see what the hotel and food are like, so it’s not the same. Photos probably won’t come out well on my phone, but I’ll try and take a few.’
A couple of years ago I’d traded my phone in for the most basic mobile I could find which was the complete opposite to Vanessa’s which had all the bells and whistles.
‘Thanks. So when will you meet your mystery guy?’
‘In…’ I glanced at my watch. ‘Shit. In seven minutes. I’d better go.’
‘I’m so excited for you, hon! Have fun and remember to take precautions.’
‘I’m not having sex on the first date! I’m not here for a fling! I’m here to find my forever guy. The whole point is to get to know him as a person over the next two weeks. We’ll have the rest of our lives to explore each other’s bodies.’
‘If you say so. From what I’ve heard, when you get matched it’s instant fireworks so if the mood strikes, don’t fight it. Please tell me that you’ve cleared out the weeds down there?’
‘The weeds?’
‘You haven’t had any action for years, so you don’t want the poor guy to waste valuable time trying to hack through a bush to reach your promised land.’
‘My promised land?’ I chuckled.
‘Yes. Please tell me you’ve pruned your pussy?’
‘Did anyone ever tell you have a way with words?’
‘What can I say? It’s a gift!’ she cackled.
‘FYI, lots of women choose not to shave these days.’
‘Sorry! I didn’t mean to body shame. You’re right. To rock or not rock the bush is a personal choice.’
‘Exactly. But fear not, the gardening has been done.’
‘Cool. I’ll let you get to your date. Break a leg!’
As I headed to the restaurant, my heart thundered in my chest. It’d been ages since I’d had a first date and so much was riding on this.
Normally, the most you’d have to lose would be your time, the cost of your travel and a drink. But I’d used all my savings to pay the balance to come here. Vanessa had invested in this trip too. I couldn’t afford for anything to go wrong.
I took a deep breath.
It’ll be fine.
The experts know what they’re doing.
‘Good evening,’ a hostess with a southern American accent said as I stepped through the huge glass restaurant doors. ‘May I take your name, please?’
‘It’s Halle. Halle Remington.’
‘Oh, yes, here we are.’ She pointed to my name on the iPad screen. ‘Nice to meet you, Halle. You’re looking gorgeous! Your date’s a very lucky man. And you’re sure in for a treat with him! He’s not here yet but we’re all so excited.’
‘Great!’ I said, thinking that everyone seemed very enthusiastic. He must be really good-looking. Or maybe he had a cool job like working in an animal shelter. That’d be right up my street.
Anything would be better than my ex. Once he got his record deal, all he ever spoke about was how many followers he had on social media or the pretentious parties he loved going to.
My pulse raced. I was so nervous. Even though I’d just checked myself in my room, the urge to make sure I didn’t have lipstick on my teeth was suddenly overpowering.
‘Do I have time to use the ladies’?’
‘Sure, honey. It’s just down the hall on your right.’
‘Thanks. Back in a mo.’
When I got to the bathroom, thankfully everything was fine. I went for a quick wee, washed my hands, then gave myself a final once-over in the mirror before heading back out to the restaurant.
When I arrived, a crowd of people had gathered by the bar. I hoped someone hadn’t fainted. I quickened my pace, eager to see what was going on. The hostess approached me just before I reached the crowd.
‘Halle! Hi! Your date’s arrived!’
‘Great! Is he at the table?’
‘If only!’ She laughed and I frowned. ‘He wasn’t able to make it that far. Looks like I wasn’t the only person who was excited to meet him.’
‘Huh?’ My face creased.
‘Your date is… well, I don’t want to ruin the surprise. Come with me, honey,’ she said, leading me towards the swarm of guests. ‘Sorry, everyone. I need to steal him away. His date is here. And remember the hotel rules and the NDA you all signed. No photos, please,’ she said sternly.
A collective disappointed groan echoed around me.
Now I was really confused. I remembered that we had to sign an NDA saying that we wouldn’t take pictures of other guests without their express permission or post anything about them online, which I thought sounded OTT, but I understood that it was to respect everyone’s privacy.
And obviously it didn’t bother me because I wasn’t interested in photos or social media.
But what made her say that now, about my date?
My mind raced, then the most likely reason hit me.
If she’d told them not to take photos, that must mean that…
Oh, God.
No, no, no.
Please, no.
As the crowd dispersed and I saw who was in front of me, my stomach tensed and the blood drained from my face.
‘Halle, I’m so thrilled to introduce you to your date, the one and only Jake Myers, although I’m sure there’s not a woman on the earth who doesn’t know who he is and want him to BUTT-RRR them up. Am I right?’
She chuckled, obviously thinking it was hilarious to reference that stupid ad jingle he did, but I wasn’t laughing.
At all.
Dread and disappointment washed over me.
‘He’s…’ I wanted to say the word ‘famous’ but nothing came out.
I couldn’t believe they’d set me up with him.
One of the main things I’d asked for on my questionnaire was not to be matched with anyone high profile.
That was a definite no-no. A deal breaker. The reddest of red flags.
After what I’d been through with my ex, the last thing I wanted was to date another singer.
And Jake wasn’t just any singer. He had a reputation for being a notorious womaniser.
My ex liked sleeping with groupies (as I found out the hard way), but Jake Myers made him look like a boy scout.
I was a good person.
I was kind to others.
I always gave my seat up on public transport to those who needed it more. So why was I being punished like this?
I didn’t know what the hell the hotel was thinking matching me with Jake, but I had no intention of sticking around to find out.