Chapter 34
TORI
We raised glasses to each other backstage, hugged each other and constantly reminded each other of how great we’d been. I answered Eleanor’s message, which she must have sent at some point shortly before the performance, telling me I’d rock, and apologizing for it being such short notice.
I’m genuinely sorry for Eleanor because she deserved to have everyone cheering her today.
I can only start to feel moderately less guilty once she texts me that she’s got a place to study acting at the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art in London – the most famous stage school in the country – and will be duly celebrating with Sophia as soon as she’s well enough.
She’ll be the star of the RADA stage, I’m sure of that.
The foyer is rammed with parents and pupils, who all turn to look as Charlie and I walk through the throng. His mother comes towards us and hugs first me, then him. So does his dad, who can’t stop gushing.
I didn’t see Will coming, and there’s such force in his hug that it almost sweeps me off my feet.
It takes ages for him and Kit, Emma and Henry to finish congratulating us.
Now I finally see Mum and Dad, who are standing a little to one side.
Will and Kit have gone back to them, and I hesitate for a wee while.
Charlie slips his hand into mine and pulls me to see them.
It’s no secret that my parents love him, he knows that, and he’s beaming as they greet us, and shower first him and then me with praise.
Dad looks like he might burst with pride at any minute and Mum’s not much different.
To my shame, though, as she hugs me, I look first to her eyes.
She’s sober, I’m pretty sure of that when she gives me a squeeze and I don’t smell booze.
I should be glad, but the night is still young.
Who knows what’ll happen later? But I can’t think about that now.
I want a bit longer of being happy and carefree – that’s not too much to ask, is it?
In the end, Dad looks at Mum once Charlie’s gone back to talk to his own parents.
‘We’d love to go out for a meal with you and William,’ he says.
‘Kit and I wanted . . .’ Will begins, and I talk over him.
‘Charlie and I thought . . .’
We laugh. ‘There’s the summer festival in Ebrington,’ I explain. ‘We’re planning to catch up with our friends there.’
‘I see.’ Dad nods. ‘We’ve booked a table in Edinburgh. I promise we’ll keep it quick, but there’s something we have to talk to you about.’
‘OK, I’ll tell Kit,’ Will says, vanishing into the crowd.
‘Can Charlie come too?’ I ask.
‘I think it would be better just the four of us, darling,’ says Mum. My stomach cramps, but I say nothing.
Charlie looks concerned when I tell him, promising I’ll join him and the others in Ebrington later.
Mum and Dad try to fill the drive to Edinburgh with small-talk, but it’s never felt longer.
Once we’re sitting in the restaurant, I wish they’d just get to the point, and I think they can sense our impatience because there’s a tense silence at our table once the starters are out of the way. Mum asked for water, not wine.
I can suddenly hardly breathe because all I can think of is Olive, crying in the costume store because her mum’s cheating on her dad and she’s afraid they’ll split up.
Is that it? Do they want to tell us they’re separating? Did they carefully choose to do so in public so that we won’t show awkward emotions or make a scene?
My pulse calms a little as Dad lays his hand on Mum’s fingers for a second. He wouldn’t do that if they were about to tell us they’re getting a divorce, would he?
‘Your mother has something to tell you,’ Dad begins.
He sounds gentle but determined. Like he has to use his words to give her a little push in the right direction.
‘You might have noticed that we haven’t said any more about how we’ll be spending the summer holidays this year,’ Mum says.
‘France?’ asks Will. ‘I thought it might be OK for Kit to come too, if you don’t mind.’
‘He’d be very welcome, darling.’ Mum smiles, but it looks slightly forced. ‘But you’ll have to go without me.’
‘What?’ Will darts a look at Dad, then me. ‘Why?’
‘I got a cancellation at a clinic in London. I’ll be travelling down next week.’
Silence.
Clinic . . .
‘Really?’
I only realize that it’s my voice asking the question when Mum nods.
‘I’ll probably be there for eight weeks, but it might be longer. I’m sorry you’re only hearing about it now. I got the call this week. But you’ll be able to visit me any time, and we can talk on the phone.’ Mum’s voice catches as I reach for her hand. It just happens.
‘We’ll visit,’ Will states.
‘Course we will,’ I add.
Mum smiles, and there’s a telltale glitter in her eyes. ‘That would make me very happy.’
‘So you’re trying again?’ I manage to ask. ‘You’re talking about rehab, right?’
My voice dropped with every word, but Mum heard. ‘I can’t go on like this,’ she says. ‘And I can’t do it on my own. I want to be there for you both . . .’ She pauses. ‘I want you to be happy to come home again.’
Her voice breaks and my throat clenches. ‘We’ll always be happy to come home, Mum,’ I whisper. ‘Whatever happens. Always.’
Will gulps hard.
Mum lowers her head. Dad’s eyes meet mine. I see the relief on his face, and the hope. He didn’t force her: this time, she wanted it herself, I’m sure of that. And that’s the best starting point for things actually getting better.
‘I’m so proud of you two,’ Mum says. ‘And I’m going to make sure you can be proud of me again too.’
SINCLAIR
Tori joins us just as I’m starting to worry.
It’s already half past ten, but the Ebrington summer festival is just getting going.
The whole town is full of tents and long tables, occupied by a mish-mash of locals, tourists and Dunbridge pupils.
The sun’s gone down but there are still kids running around the streets.
‘Hey.’ I jump as I feel hands on my shoulders. The others wave to Tori. As I turn around, she looks happy, but I think she’s been crying. Or is that just exhaustion? After all, it’s been a long and dramatic day. I can’t be sure, so I stand up.
‘Are you OK?’ I ask, stepping a few feet aside with Tori. ‘How was dinner?’
‘She’s going into rehab again.’ Tori’s voice sounds choked and it takes me a moment to process.
‘Your mum?’
She nods.
‘That’s good. That is good, right?’
‘Yes, it’s good. I think.’ She gives me an uncertain smile and I pull her closer. Tori throws her arms around me and presses her face into my shoulder. ‘What kind of a crazy day has this been?’ she murmurs.
‘I don’t know what you mean, Juliet.’
‘That really happened, didn’t it?’ She shifts away from me slightly. ‘We actually performed Romeo and Juliet?’
‘And we rocked.’
‘So now you can never accuse me of being inflexible and non-spontaneous.’
‘Like I ever would.’ I kiss her. ‘But you’re right. I love you, my spontaneous girlfriend.’
There, I said it. Just like that. Because it’s true.
Tori smiles. ‘And I love you too,’ she whispers, kissing me back. ‘Come on, we need to find the others. Might be our last time all together before everyone goes off for the summer.’
I’d have nothing against standing here, alone with her, a bit longer, her lips on mine, but we’ve got the whole night. And the whole summer. A whole life.
Tori stops as Olive comes towards us.
‘Are you leaving already?’ she asks.
Olive nods. ‘It’s the swimming gala tomorrow,’ she says. ‘I need to get my sleep.’
‘Oh, yeah,’ Tori lets go of me and goes to give Olive a hug. ‘You’ll leave them all for dust!’
‘I’ll do my best,’ says Olive, but she sounds confident. She’s clearly relieved at having got through this year. It’s been a tough one for her, and I think she’s really going to have to work hard next year too. Henry’s already offered his help, so I’m not too worried.
‘Message me when you get back – I want to know every detail.’
Olive smiles. ‘Will do. You can do a bit more partying for me. You two were amazing today.’ She waves and disappears into the darkness.
I love to see Tori looking so content and chilled.
Not even Valentine Ward can affect how happy I’m feeling – he and a few of his pals came past just now, already steaming.
Obviously, they’re way too cool for the village festival.
They’re sure to be down in the Dungeon, getting absolutely wasted.
Not long now and he’ll be gone. For ever. It’s almost too good to be true.
I force myself not to waste any more thought on him as we head back to our friends.
They give us a cheer and budge up so that Tori and I can sit down.
Henry’s got his arm around Emma – they can’t keep their hands off each other, even though they’ve got a while before Henry flies out to visit his parents in Kenya and the two of them have to spend no less than three whole weeks apart.
Doesn’t bear thinking about. Mind you, I’m one to talk.
I wouldn’t like the idea of being without Tori for so long either.
Fortunately, we get to spend the whole summer together.
Our Interrail tickets are booked and we’ve settled our route.
It’s our first big adventure together, yet it can’t compare with what we’ve already been through.
And that was just the beginning. I have to keep repeating it to myself, over and over again, as I look at Tori, hardly able to believe my bloody luck.
It’s like every year, just before the long holidays.
A mixture of satisfaction and slight wistfulness that another year at Dunbridge Academy is behind us.
But this time, it’s different. Because we’ve only got one left.
The upper sixth, after which we’ll be scattered to the winds.
I can’t think about it. I just can’t. And it doesn’t matter yet because we’re all here.
Gideon, Grace, Omar, Henry, Emma, Tori and Olive, even if she’s asleep.
I can’t imagine ever being such good friends with anyone as I am with these people.
The others are talking about the play, our successful uniform rebellion, which is still making waves on social media, their plans for the holidays and the next school year.
I don’t know what time it is, but the tables are gradually emptying and the sky is pitch black.
Tori fights a yawn; I’m about to ask her if we should head back when Emma suddenly jumps up.
‘Em?’ Henry reaches for her hand, but she doesn’t even seem to notice. ‘What’s wrong?’
Her eyes are fixed on something beyond us. ‘Can you see that?’
I turn, but can’t see anything alarming.
‘What do you mean?’ Tori asks.
‘Shit,’ Henry mumbles. I’m standing up too now, and I can see what they mean.
The dark clouds of smoke rising behind the houses of Ebrington, barely visible against the night.
Beneath them, glowing flames are leaping into the sky.
It’s such a surreal sight that, for a moment, I just stare in fascination. But then I realize what it means.
Every sound fades into the background, yet I can hear raised voices around us.
‘That’s Dunbridge,’ says Gideon, flatly. ‘The west wing, I think. Fuck . . .’
Tori’s standing motionless beside me. She’s pale.
‘Oh, my God.’ Grace’s voice trembles and she grabs Gideon’s wrist. There’s blind panic on her face. ‘Olive.’ That’s all she says.
Olive . . .
My blood runs cold. Fire, it’s the west wing, Olive went back ages ago to get some sleep. I have to call Mum, no, the fire brigade, first the fire brigade.
I hear sirens in the distance.
My heart stops. Tori digs her fingers into my arm.
And then we run.