Chapter 15 #2
Martha took Thea’s hand from across the table, stroking the back of it and seemingly marvelling that she was able to touch it.
‘Wherever love cannot be open there will always be misconception,’ she said.
‘We cannot talk openly unless together and in private and we were not able to do so. But I need you to know there was never anybody else. That even through adventure, peril and discovery, you were always in my thoughts.’ She placed down her cup and reached for the box she had placed on the table.
‘What’s in there?’ Thea asked, curious.
Martha looked almost embarrassed. She kept Thea’s eyes for a few seconds, clicked a small, brass key in a lock and lifted the lid with the pressure of a thumb.
Thea bent her head to peer inside, unsure what to expect.
As the candlelight hit, they both looked at the contents.
Tens or maybe hundreds of pebbles in a spectrum of colours, some large, some tiny, some smooth, some rough.
Each one was tied carefully with a piece of string or cotton, a brown parchment label attached.
Thea had no idea what to think, or do, but Martha nodded towards them, indicating that Thea should take one. She did, a mid-sized, smooth, black pebble. Turning over the label, she read out loud. ‘Madre de Dios, Chile.’ She looked back at Martha. ‘You collected pebbles?’
Martha smiled. ‘I did.’
‘Why?’ Thea picked another pebble and then another, each with their own unique location attached. Isola Madre, Surabaya, Bencoolen – they all sounded hopelessly exotic.
‘For you,’ said Martha simply. ‘I know how partial you were to them on our journey to Whitby and so I resolved early in my travels to take one from every place I visited so you would know you were in my thoughts. I didn’t send them on as I wanted to give them to you myself, but then…
’ she stopped abruptly and took a breath which stuttered a little.
Thea was mesmerised. ‘Anyway, even after I came back, and went away again, I didn’t stop, because I always hoped, and I wanted to feel you with me. ’
‘I always was,’ said Thea quietly, feeling how true it was.
Her heart was full now she was certain of Martha’s commitment, the relief almost palpable.
She replaced the pebbles in the box and slipped off her chair to kneel in front of Martha, just to be closer.
‘How I felt when I thought you had given me up…’
‘Never,’ said Martha, leaning into her.
Thea stroked Martha’s hands in her own. ‘I am so sorry I doubted you.’
Martha shook her head. ‘How could you do otherwise?’
‘Well not anymore.’ Thea was resolute. ‘Never again.’
Martha smiled. ‘I almost can’t believe you’re here.’ She traced a finger down Thea’s cheek. ‘How I have longed to have you with me.’ The look she gave Thea was solemn, but with a glint of heat.
‘I wanted you,’ said Thea, any hint of doubt leaving her at that look of fire. ‘In every possible way.’
‘Every possible way,’ muttered Martha, her dark eyes reflected the fire ahead of her.
Thea felt her face pull into an involuntary smile. ‘I do wish you would kiss me, Lady Foxmore. Do you not know I have waited long enough already?’
‘Long enough,’ repeated Martha, her eyes on Thea’s lips, and then they were pressed together, their mouths soft against one another, stroking, tasting, more considered than their urgent kiss on the pier.
A longing Thea thought she had lost unfurled like a leaf in the first days of spring.
They broke apart after an amount of time she couldn’t quantify.
‘Too long,’ said Thea, and heard how breathless she was. She pulled Martha to her feet.
Martha steadied herself on one of Thea’s shoulders and blinked, as if to bring herself back to the parlour.
She looked almost embarrassed, and Thea hated the distance that had been put between them.
Hated that the solidity of their trust had been weakened by something so vindictive, and so outside of their control.
‘Would you like me to call the carriage?’ asked Martha. Thea could see it was a genuine offer, that Martha would allow her to take her time, but she could also see the need that resided in those eyes.
‘Don’t you dare,’ she smiled, as she dropped another kiss onto Martha’s lips. Martha made a throaty sound of relief and slid fingers into Thea’s hair, pulling her close.
‘Thank god,’ she said.
‘It’s funny,’ said Martha as she followed Thea up the stairs, their hands clasped together. ‘I felt such distance from you for the past two years, now you are here it is like we have never been apart.’
‘You have been with me always,’ said Thea looking back. ‘Even when I was uncertain of your feelings, I could never get you out of my mind.’
‘And you never left mine,’ said Martha, as she almost bumped into Thea at the top of the landing. She turned her round, bringing her hand up to Thea’s neck and tracing a line from her ear to her collar bone. ‘How I needed you.’ Martha’s sultry tone made Thea’s insides burn.
Thea leaned forward and placed a single, gentle kiss on Martha’s lips. It was soft – so soft – and she savoured it. The velvet feel of her, the taste and the anticipation. Their lips left one another, but Thea didn’t retreat.
‘Mmph,’ said Martha, resting her forehead on Thea’s and swallowing audibly.
‘Are we going to stay on the landing all night, Your Grace.’ She let the final words drip out like honey and Thea heard the smile in her voice.
She couldn’t help the wicked grin that bloomed on her own face.
She stepped backwards and hit Martha’s bedroom door.
Martha reached around her for the handle and let them in.
The fire was lit, flickering its light and warmth over the large sheepskin rug Martha always kept by the fireplace.
‘Looks cozy,’ said Thea, her eyes flicking back to Martha’s as she clicked the door shut behind them. She leaned in and placed another, gentle but inflaming kiss on Martha’s lips.
‘Bed?’ asked Martha, sinking her fingers into Thea’s hair and pulling her forward to kiss her again, now firmer, exploring her insistently.
‘Rug,’ clarified Thea, pushing Martha in the direction of the fire but not breaking contact.
Her hands travelled down Martha’s waist, tracing the familiar curves.
A moan fled her throat and drew an answering one in return.
Martha pulled her down and laid her on the soft rug so that she could feel the warmth on her face and the fleece at her back.
Her skirts and hoops stood proud from the floor, so Martha pushed them to one side, the firelight flickering on her strong profile as she framed herself over Thea with her arms. God, how Thea had longed for this.
Desire built so quickly within her that she wasn’t sure she could control it.
She gasped as Martha kissed down her neck and her breath came quickly as she felt her scarf undone.
She thought she might burst as Martha trailed a hand up her side and caressed a breast through her straining stays.
‘May I?’ asked Martha, throatily.
‘Please, yes,’ she heard herself say, and it must have sounded urgent as Martha’s head tilted up.
A look of pure hunger resolved in the hazel eyes.
Martha shifted her weight and began to tug at the buttons on Thea’s stomacher, but Thea stilled her hand with her own.
‘No time,’ she gasped, gesturing to her gown.
‘Complicated,’ was all she could get out.
‘Please,’ she said again, not caring if she sounded pathetic and desperate.
Martha nodded and placed a kiss on the dress over Thea’s stomach before Thea lost contact with her.
She hadn’t accounted for the equal complexity of her hoop skirts.
Eventually she felt Martha at the hem, before feeling layers of silk rustling around her legs.
Suddenly Martha’s face appeared over the top hoop.
‘You have half a draper’s down here.’ Thea suppressed a laugh, not wanting to ruin the moment.
‘Can you manage?’ she asked, as alluringly as she could muster given the awkward situation.
‘Trying,’ muttered Martha thoughtfully as she tried to unfurl the layers.
It caused a strange mixture of amusement and arousal.
Once, Thea felt a hand on her calf, but then it left as Martha grasped the top hoop, pulled down the springy cane and peered over it.
‘Almost there,’ she said. A shudder of amusement threatened to burst out of Thea, but she kept it in, until Martha’s hand slipped as she shifted, the hoop sprang back into shape, and clocked Martha firmly and squarely under her nose.
There was a moment of perfectly still silence as Martha’s face registered the surprise, and then she simply knelt there, staring at the hoop as it and its attached silken deer bobbed smugly in front of her.
‘Good lord,’ she said dryly.
Now Thea struggled to contain the guffaw that threatened to burst out. ‘Are you alright?’ she asked squeakily, proud that she managed to keep the effect on her voice to a slight waver.
Martha checked her nose with the base of her thumb, peering at it in the firelight. ‘Well, there’s no blood,’ she said, ‘so I assume so.’
The look of surprise on her face was now tinged with horror that their eagerly anticipated moment had been interrupted, and a little embarrassment. ‘I’m not going in there again,’ she said, definitely.