17. Clem September 7, 1888
Dearest Mother,
I will not tell Rosie how dejected I am by the reversal.
But I’m sure you could sense my disappointment.
So many years of planning. The entrance exam.
The tokens. All of it wasted. At the moment I can’t see a new way through.
I have faith that something will become clear, but everything is murky and uncertain now.
Mother, have you confided in Cassandra? Mead’s thew?
She came to me as I was leaving. I wonder if you saw us, since we were at the edge of campus, near the outer limits of your perception.
She was waiting for me. I thought she intended some violence, but instead she gave me something. It is a piece of human bone.
How easy it would be for her to tell Mead about you, and in so doing overthrow all our efforts.
But she hasn’t done that. Instead, she’s given me this bone.
Why? What does she intend with it? She said: “For your armor…” Does she anticipate such injuries to my person that I could only repair with enchantment of bone? What kind of armor would that require?
I think she meant to explain more, but she was drawn away by Mead.
Mother, I have so little experience of thews that I have never seen one coerced in that way.
The pain on her face was excruciating. She was truly a soul in torment.
I hadn’t expected to feel sympathy for someone who had just exposed me, not in the least, but if in that moment I could have ended her pain somehow, even if by striking Mead with my own hand, I would have done it.
I realized then that an enchanter, when he pressures the shroud, is a genuine torturer.
And I understood why a thew does whatever she must to abide and comply.
Even a small disobedience, as Cassandra undertook, is a tremendous act of courage.
Please tell me that you have never been so treated by him.
Your loving,
Clem