22. Empress
Chapter Twenty-Two
EMPRESS
This morning, I woke up in pain and panic.
I was no longer being cared for by the unknown nurses and doctor that had checked in on me around the clock.
Instead of seeing white walls, I woke up in a smaller room that had teal blue walls.
The room smelled like eucalyptus and lavender.
The walls were bare of any decorations or furniture.
No TV nor medical equipment, I was laying on a hospital bed, with a hospital gown on.
I moved the white sheets back and observed my side.
Fresh bandaging covered the area where I was shot at.
I came to only one conclusion; Sovereign moved me and had me at an unknown location.
I feared seeing or looking into my sister’s eyes.
I didn’t want to see the hurt and disappointment plastered on her face.
I knew in my heart that Queen would never forgive me for what I had done. She also would never trust me again.
I might’ve not acted like it or showed it but Sovereign was my lifeline.
She was all I had, if I knew what I finally figured out now.
I wish I could go back in time to the young me and make better decisions.
Murk’um was dead because of me. I didn’t know what hurt me more.
His death or Sovereign never forgiving me.
I felt like shit, and I knew I looked even worse. The doorknob turning got my attention, my heart rate sped up, dread came over me and it felt like it took whoever was on the other side of that door forever to walk in.
I was unable to relax because I now feared the worst happening. My thoughts were racing and then everything seemed to go still as Sovereign walked into the room with an unreadable facial expression plastered on her face.
I gave her a sympathetic look, and that’s when she let the unreadable facial expression go.
Her eyes got glossy as she neared the bed.
Sovereign smelled like heaven, as always, she was well-dressed.
She walked and looked like money. She got to the side of my hospital bed and sat her YSL purse down.
Opening it up, she pulled out a weave brush.
Her hair was neatly pulled back into a low ponytail, and her natural baby hair decorated her edges.
I hadn’t seen myself in days and I stopped counting the days after a week of being hooked up to different machines.
I sighed hard as my tears started flowing.
I didn’t know what to say at first, so I whispered sorry to her.
I couldn’t even look her directly in the eyes because my guilty conscience was chewing away at my sanity.
“Don’t speak, Empress just listen to me. I already know why you tried to rob Teddy.” She peeked around my head and found the matted-down chunks of hair. Starting at the ends she softly brushed and detangled my hair. I closed my eyes and waited for Sovereign to say something.
The silence and the sound of her breathing was eating away at me. Her first set of words broke the damn and my tears started flowing at a rapid pace.
“You really hurt me, Empress. It makes me wonder what all you have been hiding from me.” She paused and my stomach tightened. The best thing for me to do right now was to remain quiet and not say a thing.
I didn’t know how she even knew, how or why I tried to rob Teddy. That in itself had me paranoid. If she knew about me and Melvin, then she probably wouldn’t be brushing my hair.
“My husband keeps trying to convince me that the people I love are trying to betray and hurt me for the worse. I feel like it’s bullshit, but then again after I discovered that our father was still alive and hiding from us…
” she paused and this time I turned to look at her.
Maybe it was the medication that had me hearing shit. Did she just say our father was alive?
“Yea, you heard me correctly. Our father is alive, I discovered that shit three weeks ago when I went on a mission to kill a husband and wife that our Abuela put a hit out on. She didn’t give me a reason for the hit.
Abuela just said that they were enemies and it had to be done, in order for her to help me find Melvin.
” She stopped talking and moved to the other side of my hospital bed, to start on the other side of my hair.
The mention of Melvin’s name had me sweating and I hoped that she couldn’t see the change in my demeanor from just mentioning that man’s name.
“When I get there, I’m ready to kill until an old ass man calls me by my government name.
He claimed he leaves his front and back door open for me.
He knew that one day, I would come. I find out he’s our uncle and dad came down the hallway to see whom his uncle was talking to.
” She started brushing through my hair a little rough and nervousness took back over me as she started to giggle softly.
To a person that didn’t know Sovereign, they would relax thinking shit was cool because she was giggling like something was hilarious to her. This was my big sister, and I knew her better than I knew myself. Sovereign was angry as fuck.
“Can you believe that I fainted? I became so overwhelmed with emotions!” She yelled and her voice bounced off the walls. She stopped brushing my hair as she stepped away from the bed and placed her hands on her hips. She started to pace back in forth with her fist clenching tight.
“I was emotional and angry, hurt and some more shit! My father was still alive after all the fucked up shit I had to go through to provide for your ungrateful entitled ass! I did shit that I would never forgive myself for! All for you to rob Teddy because you didn’t like that I gave him a position that he didn’t ask for!
” She was no longer looking at me, she was about to go into one of her maniac episodes.
It was best for me to just listen and pray that she didn’t hurt me.
“I mean this nigga alive and doing just fine!” she spat bitterly, a tear escaped her eye and my heart broke.
“I had to marry a stranger, who happens to almost be a little crazier than me. I haven’t known the nigga that long but a sick part of me likes him.
I’m a fuckin Queenpin, I’m rich as fuck but I’m only in the position that I am in now because of our backstabbing grandmother who had our mother executed and our father outcasted. ”
Sovereign placed her hands on her knees and howled like a coyote. I couldn’t decipher if she was laughing too hard or sobbing. She caught her breath and gave me an icy glare.
“I watched our father take my gun and shoot our uncle in the head. He didn’t want Abuela to know that I didn’t complete the mission that she sent me on.
Then he went to the back of the house and killed our aunt, while she was sleeping.
I took pictures and sent them over to Abuela from our uncle’s phone so she could know the mission was complete. ”
Sovereign was hysterical, the wild look in her eyes showed that she was having a hard time processing everything.
“Why the fuck did I go along with what Papa told me to do after I felt like he betrayed us too? I don’t fucking know!
He gave me his number and disappeared out the back door.
After the mission was complete, I paid a visit to Abuela.
” I watched my sister take a seat on the tile floor and fold her legs until she was sitting Indian style.
She rocked back and forth, her eyes connected with mine, I wished I could get up and hold her.
“That old ass vindictive bitch, smiled in my face and poured us up glasses of the finest champagne in Mexico and toasted to new money and power.” She pointed at her purse, and I reached to the side of me and grabbed it.
Making sure it was closed, I tossed it her way.
She opened it up and pulled out a blunt along with a lighter.
After sparking her blunt, she inhaled deeply then exhaled.
“I disappeared for a while; I can’t trust none of y’all.
So, I disappeared to sort my thoughts. While I was away…
. I realized that my heart became colder, that shit is frozen.
” She pulled her gun out of her purse and stood up from the floor.
I stopped breathing momentarily to gauge what was going on.
“I can look deep into those troubled eyes, Empress…. There’s more to you but I wouldn’t know because you a flaw ass bitch. Selfish and dirty like our Abuela and father.”
I shivered as she caressed my cheek with the tip of her gun.
“I want to kill you Empress, I can’t because I love you. I raised you… I thought I did a good job at doing that but it’s obvious that it’s something I failed at.”
My bottom lip started to tremble, and I could no longer hold back or hide the fear that was lodged inside of me. Sovereign had a wild look in her eyes. The bags that sat underneath her eyes were heavy like she did a lot of crying and worrying.
“I never meant to hurt you, Sovereign.” My voice cracked.
“You did hurt me.” She snickered and then wiped her nose.
“I ain’t no weak ass bitch, hurt becomes numb after so long you know?
” She turned her gun to the butt and cocked it back like she was about to crush my face in.
Something was holding her back as I clenched the sheet tightly in my shaking hands.
“Fuck!!!!” I jumped at her elevated tone of voice. Her shoulders dropped first, followed by her bowing her head. She turned away from me and it felt like I could breathe again.
I watched her walk to retrieve her expensive purse. She placed the gun back inside and then turned to walk towards the door.