39. Daniel
39
DANIEL
S omething’s ringing as I push my eyes open, they are hazy, it was a big night last night. I pick up my phone and answer it, “What,” I grumble.
“I’ve just been yelled at by my woman because of you doing something fucking idiotic,” Louis yells at me.
“Fucking hell, stop yelling.”
“No. I will not stop fucking yelling. You upset Emily which means I have a fucking problem,” he continues to yell at me.
“Why the hell would Emily have a problem with me?” I ask him as I rub my flat stomach.
“Because you made her best friend cry with your fucking antics in Greece.”
He has my attention right now. “What did you say?”
“Rosie saw your photos of what you’ve been up to. Why the hell did you never tell me you’ve been seeing Rosie for six months,” he continues to yell at me.
When I posted those things, I thought she was blocked from there, but obviously not, unless someone showed her.
“We weren’t dating, we weren’t anything,” I tell him. That realization squeezes my heart, and I try to shake the ache away.
“That’s not what she says.”
This has me sitting up. “What does she say?” I hate that there is a bit of hope still floating through me. Alex telling me about Dubai made me realize that I hadn’t been listening to what Rosie had been telling me all these months. It’s glaringly obvious that I was nothing more than something for her to play with until she left. Rosie made it clear her career would come first, she even mentioned moving overseas. She wouldn’t commit to me, all the signs were there, she just wasn’t into me. I had fallen in love with this girl and all she saw me as was some fun till she left.
“You don’t deserve to know,” he spits. Whatever. I don’t care. I stay silent. “Talk to me, Daniel. When Elisabeth left me, you were there for me, you made sure I didn’t give up and now it’s my turn to return the favor.”
“What more is there to say? I fell in love with Rosie Hunt, and she doesn’t feel the same way.”
“Did she tell you that?”
“Yes.”
“Then why did Emily tell me Rosie seemed heartbroken over seeing your stories.”
“Maybe she’s jealous. You know the whole, I don’t want him but no one else can,” I spit.
“Rosie doesn’t seem like that.”
“Doesn’t matter now.”
“You seem angry about it, so yeah I think it matters,” Louis says.
“I’m on a yacht in the Mediterranean with a bunch of beautiful women. I have no cares.”
“Seriously? You think a revolving door of women is going to make you forget Rosie Hunt?”
“It worked for you.”
“Daniel, what the hell. You just told me you were in love with Rosie. That is huge for you. And now you’re throwing her away as if she doesn’t mean anything to you.”
“I’m not talking about it with you.”
“You will, otherwise, I’m getting on the next flight to Greece and making you talk to me.”
Like a child, I hang up on my brother. He calls again and again but I ignore every single one of them.
I’m lazing in the sun on the deck watching the women pose and take hundreds of photos. Yes, they are all beautiful, they’re models, but none of them pique my interest. Luckily, other friends of mine are here to entertain them because I’m not in the mood. My phone rings again and I check to see if it’s my brother again, but it’s Alistair.
“Hey,” I say, answering his call.
“Seriously?” Alex says. I pull the phone away and check the number, no it’s definitely Alistair’s. “You’ll answer his call but not mine.” That’s because you read me the Riot Act when I canceled the party, and high-tailed it to Greece.
“I don’t want to hear it,” I groan to him.
Alex’s nickname is Mr. Romantic. He always had love hearts in his eyes, and ever since meeting his soulmate that is Ivy Starr, he wants everyone else to feel the same way. Granted, everyone is like him, I’m just the last one standing, and I thought that, finally, it was my turn to join their club. I was wrong.
“You will hear it. I wish I never told you about Dubai because then I’d know I wasn’t the reason two people’s hearts are hurt. But what you’re doing to Rosie is cruel.” She’s not missing me. “Ivy said she’s quiet around the office. She’s lost her light.” My stomach turns. It’s for the best.
“She deserves to have the career she’s worked so hard for. I don’t want to be the reason for her to stay,” I tell him.
“Did you even discuss that with her?”
“No. Because she’s told me so many times that is what she wants.”
“Did you tell her you loved her?” Alex asks.
“No. I asked her to start a future with me and she couldn’t answer me. Now I know why, because she wanted to go to Dubai and didn’t know how to tell me.”
“You’re being a moron,” Alex says. “A fucking stubborn moron.”
“I’ve heard the same thing from Louis. I will not make Rosie choose between her career and me. I don’t care that I can’t see my life with anyone else, or that I’ve thought about what it might be like to have kids with her. It’s best if I make a clean break so that she can move on more easily,” I explain to him.
“Again, have you explained this to her?”
“It’s for the best this way.”
“For whom? Because all I can see is you hurting two people,” Alex yells at me.
“I’ll get over it,” I grumble.
“I know you will, but I don’t know if Rosie can.” That pit in my stomach opens further from hearing his words. “I know you think you’re doing the right thing, but I’m telling you, you’re not. Come home and deal with it.”
“I can’t,” I confess.
“Tell Rosie how you feel. Lay it all out at her feet, and if she says no, then at least you know.” Silence falls between us. “If you stay out there and she sees the shit that you’re posting then you may lose her for good.”
My heart is pumping, and my palms are sweaty as I hold the flowers for Rosie. I got back last night from Greece, Alex was right. I never gave Rosie the chance, I took the choice away from her. I hurt her. I fucked up. I let fear rule me and I’m going to have to deal with the consequences. I press the bell to her apartment and wait and wait and wait. Shit. She’s not there, I look down at my watch, it’s almost eight. Is she on a date? Is she working late? I take a couple of steps onto the pavement to see if there are any lights on in her flat, and there aren’t. My stomach twists and turns. I’ve fucked up.
Daniel: Rosie’s not home.
Alex: Then you wait.
So, I do, but another thirty minutes roll by and she’s still not home.
Daniel: Do you know where Rosie is?
Louis: Emily is finding out.
Louis: She was shopping.
Louis: Getting stuff for Dubai.
Louis: She leaves next week.
Daniel: I know.
Louis: Ok.
I wait another thirty minutes, and then I see her walking toward me. She looks up and stills, noticing me for the first time. Fuck, I’ve missed her. She looks beautiful dressed in black flowy pants and a tan shirt. Her hair is out, she’s wearing black flats, and carrying one of the bags I bought her. A black jacket is slung over her arm and in the other hand are a couple of shopping bags.
“Daniel, what are you doing here?” she asks through gritted teeth, those green eyes noticing the flowers in my hand. I don’t think they are going to be enough, she doesn’t look happy to see me.
“Thought we needed to talk.”
“You want to talk now? I wanted to talk to you last week and you ignored me. So, it’s not convenient for me,” she says, walking past me and the flowers.
“Rosie, please,” I say, reaching out and touching her arm. She pulls it away as if I scalded her.
“How was your work trip? Guess spending the week admiring models in Greece might be considered art to some.” The look of disgust she gives me kills me. I’ve fucked up.
“Nothing happened with any of them.”
“So, you thought you would slink back to good old Rosie. I’m not interested.”
“It’s not like that. Please, can we talk about this inside?” I ask her.
“No. I don’t care what you have to say. I heard it loud and clear last week.” With that, she walks toward her flat.
“But I love you,” I confess to her.
She stills.
“Don’t move to Dubai.”
Rosie whirls around. “What did you say?”
“Alex told me about Dubai. I freaked out. I knew given the choice between your career and me, you were going to choose your career.”
“I never lied to you.”
“I know. You didn’t tell me either.”
“I couldn’t.”
I nod. “Did I ever have a chance?”
Rosie wraps her arms around herself. “What do you mean?”
“Was I the only one falling?” My question takes her aback.
She stares at me, and emotion shimmers in her eyes. “I’ve got to go.” She turns around and heads to her apartment.
“Rosie, please, tell me. Was I the only one falling?” I plead with her.
Turning around, I can see tears rolling down her cheeks. “Yes.” With that, she rushes into the foyer of her apartment, the door slamming behind her. Her answer hits me like a punch to the gut.
She never felt the same way.