Chapter 61
Each time I felt close to waking, the darkness would creep back in.
It was hard to fight the urge to give in to it, I felt as though I’d been hit by a truck.
Everything from the waist up was throbbing and from the waist down all I could feel was a tingling numbness from god knows what.
A familiar hand held mine, the thumb circling over my knuckles.
Where the hell was I?
When my eyes flickered open, I cringed at the bright, artificial light.
Arturo? Where are you?
“Bella,” I turned my head to see a handsome face, lined with relief. Tears sprang to his eyes as he lifted a cup of water to my lips. The moment the cool liquid hit the back of my throat, I groaned in relief.
“W-Where am I?” I managed, my voice croaky with disuse.
“You’re in hospital.” His eyes dropped from mine, as if he was composing himself.
“O-our b-baby?” I panicked, pain radiating through me with every movement I made. I clutched my bump only to realise it was a lot smaller than before. “Arturo, where’s our baby?” I sobbed.
“She’s okay,” he breathed, taking my hand once more. My heart slowed as his words sunk in.
“She?”
“Yes. We have a beautiful baby girl, my love.” He kissed my knuckles as tears fell from my eyes. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered against my skin.
“W-what for?”
“My mum, she—” he started.
“Y-yes, your mother , not you,” I winced, wriggling up the bed.
“But I let her into our lives…” he whispered, guilt and anguish filling his features. “Never in my most fucked up dreams did I imagine she could do anythin’ like this.” I squeezed his hand with what strength I had.
“You don’t get to blame yourself.” I soothed as he wrapped his arms carefully around me.
“I thought I was goin’ to lose you, hermosa . I can’t lose my girls.”
“We’re not going anywhere.”
As Arturo filled me in on what was happening with our daughter, everything that had happened at the house began to flood back. The way his mother lost it, and how she wrecked the nursery before setting her sights on me.
“I tried to protect our baby, but your mother was crafty. She knew what she set out to do.” I sighed, letting my head fall back against the pillow.
“Forget her for now. I’ll deal with it. I just want to enjoy this time with you.” he smiled, I knew it was going to be hard for him to face her again and to find out why she did what she did but I also knew he could do it. “ Hermosa , I have an idea for a name.”
“Tell me.” I beamed as he perched on the edge of the bed, his fingers linking with my own.
“Valencia Peyton Ramos.”
“Valencia?” I asked, genuine love for the name warming my heart.
“I was searchin’ online while I was waitin’ for you to wake up. It stood out, y’know? It means strong, and she’s already showin’ that’s what she is.”
“It’s perfect. I love it.” I couldn’t hide the happiness at the name he’d chosen, he had wanted to honour my best friend too. It was beautiful. “I want to see her.”
“Once the nurse has been in, I’ll take you.” He brought his lips to mine. “I was so scared, Bella.”
“There’s no need to be,” I breathed, exhaustion creeping in once again. “I’m fine and Valencia is in the best place for now.” I winced as I wrapped my arms around his neck, breathing in his familiar scent.
“I love you,” he whispered against my neck.
“I love you, too.”
Days passed and the more people that visited, the more obvious it was that the nurses had given up trying to make my family stick to visiting hours. They knew they were fighting a losing battle.
As I healed, I spent most of my time with Valencia and Arturo in the NICU. To our relief, her little lungs and heart grew stronger with each passing minute.
“Are you two ready to hold her today?” the nurse asked, entering the room.
“We can hold her?” Arturo asked, his face splitting with a big smile.
“Indeed you can, she’s doing well.” She began to open the incubator, arranging her tubes carefully. “You’ll just need to be careful.” She looked over at me, a smile splitting her lips. “She’ll benefit from skin to skin if you want to uncover your chest.” I did as she asked with the help of Arturo.
She lifted Valencia out carefully and placed her in my arms. They say when you hold your baby for the first time it’s a feeling like no other, but this?
This took my breath away. The love I felt instantly consumed me.
She looked so tiny as I cradled her in my arms. I couldn’t stop the tears from trickling down my face.
“Sorry,” I sobbed, “she’s just so small… so perfect.”
Arturo brought his forehead to my temple, placing his finger beneath Valencia’s tiny hand. “You don’t need to be sorry. I cried too.”
“You cried?”
“Have you looked at her? She’s absolutely perfect, ain’t she?” he chuckled, wrapping his free arm around me. “Of course I cried.”
“She is… I can’t wait to take her home.” I sighed, her gentle breathing falling in sync with my own.
“Me too.”
“Do you want to hold her?” I asked, my gaze meeting his widening one.
“I don’t want to hurt her.” he swallowed.
“You won’t!” I signalled the nurse over as she informed Arturo skin to skin was the best option for him too. Nodding he complied and stripped off his t-shirt.
The second she placed Valencia against his chest, I saw the love of my life—the fiercest and most emotionally distanced man I had ever known—instantly soften. My heart filled to the brim as his eyes welled with happiness, he had never looked so content.
“You three are a beautiful family, congratulations.” The nurse smiled, nodding her head to the window. “I’m guessing they’re yours?”
I laughed as we gazed towards the window to the NICU. “They’re my parents.” Looking up, Arturo caught my father’s gaze. After a beat the pair exchanged a nod and a smile.
As my attention was once again taken up by staring at my baby girl in her father’s arms, the reality of what I had been through dawned on me.
The doctors had said I had nearly died on that operating table, that my heart had stopped.
Perhaps that was why Tyler and Peyton came to me.
I faintly remembered something drawing me towards them, but the more I ran to them, the further away they got.
In my heart, I knew it was their way of telling me it wasn’t my time, and it hadn’t been.
I had a family to return to… one that needed me.
One I would never be ready to leave.