Chapter 14
I’m slinking around campus after my Possibilities of Portraiture lecture, sipping on an iced mocha from the Workshop, half wondering if I should go home, half wanting to just very casually swing by the Quad Media office to see if Felix is there.
He’s definitely been there at this time before, so the odds are good.
Plus, I should check the pigeonhole to see if anyone’s sent in another problem, so I really do have plausible deniability.
And besides, it’s a perfectly acceptable time to suggest a drink, and even busy magazine editors need a break with their cute little pink-haired girlie.
It’s settled. My work here done, I make my way out of the café and through the little courtyard towards the building that houses the Quad Media rooms. Coming in the opposite direction and walking inescapably towards me is Aaron Hayes, a pleasant but unremarkable fling from my first year.
We make awkward eye contact, but I refuse to pretend we don’t know each other so I cheerily greet him with a ‘Hello, Aaron!’
‘Hi, Mary-Elizabeth,’ he mumbles, passing me before doubling back. ‘I just wanted to say I went to your club night, and it was pretty great.’ He’s shifting slightly awkwardly from foot to foot as he addresses me.
‘Oh! That’s nice of you to say,’ I reply graciously, feeling vaguely like minor royalty.
‘Would you want to . . . get a drink sometime?’ he asks, raising his eyebrows optimistically.
‘Like a date?’
‘Well . . .’ He swallows and clears his throat. ‘I don’t know if I would call it that, but . . .’
I sigh. I truly only have eyes for Felix at the moment.
Sometimes I have to live out the advice I dispense in my columns, and it feels apt that only this term I had to extol the virtues of rejection.
‘I had a great time with you but I’m not really in a dating mode right now.
But I’ll see you around, and I hope you come to the next one? ’
‘Sure,’ he says, blushing deeply. ‘I’ll see you then.’
The funny thing is, I couldn’t get a scrap of attention from Aaron after we slept together. It was like as soon as he got what he wanted he lost all interest, and now I’m a bloody superstar DJ he wants to hop back on the Mary-Elizabeth hype train! Classic. Just as Tyler predicted!
When I make it to the Quad Magazine office, I can see the light is on through the glass panel at the top of the door, which means someone must be there.
I push the door open and – yes! I have truly hit the jackpot!
Not only is Felix here, but no one other than Felix is here!
This is the best of all possible scenarios.
His head jerks up from his laptop, his floppy hair falling across his face. ‘Oh!’
‘Only me,’ I say, setting my bag down on a chair and walking over to the desk where all his stuff is spread out.
‘Were you coming to do some work?’
‘No, I was just looking for you.’
‘Why? What’s up?’
The directness of the question takes me aback. Why wouldn’t I be looking for him just because I want to see him? I shrug. ‘I hadn’t seen you in a while so thought you might be here.’
He smiles, but there’s an air of impatience around him. ‘Well,’ he says, holding his arms out to me, ‘that’s very nice of you, but I’ve got a lot going on right now,’ he says, before kissing me, which is nice, but also he is very much brushing me off.
‘OK . . .’ I say warily. ‘It’s not a big deal, I just thought I’d come by the office, don’t worry about it.’ I should have bloody gone out with Aaron Hayes instead, shouldn’t I?
‘I’m sorry, Mary-Elizabeth, it’s just . .
.’ He shakes his head bitterly. ‘You just don’t get it, do you?
How messed up things are here? How hard I’m having to fight so that the magazine doesn’t just disappear?
That problem hasn’t gone away, you know, and it’s my responsibility.
It’s a big responsibility! Having to make our case to the union for continued funding, having to explain what we do that’s so .
. . bloody . . . special and unique that the newspaper doesn’t do, can’t do, justifying the continued relevance of the magazine.
They want to shut it down, or at least stop funding it.
It’s like we’re in this silly battle with the newspaper, and the newspaper will always win because it’s more proper. ’
I sigh. ‘I didn’t know things were that bad.’
‘Well, you wouldn’t, would you? You have basically no responsibilities, you just do your column and that’s it, but I’m the editor and it’s all resting on my shoulders,’ he says, exasperated.
‘OK . . . well, if there’s anything I can do to help . . .’ I pick up my bag and go to leave the office. I mean, it’s technically true that I have basically no responsibilities, but I don’t like the way he says it.
He drops his head into his hands. ‘I’m sorry. I’m just stressed. I didn’t mean to take it out on you.’
I turn back, keen to stand my ground a bit. I shrug from the doorway. ‘Whatever, don’t worry about it.’
‘No, wait, come back,’ he says, stretching his arms out to me from his swivel chair. ‘Come here.’
That’s more like it! I casually stroll over to him, and he gestures for me to sit on his lap.
I decide to be brave and not worry about the weight limit of the Quad Magazine swivel chairs.
He wraps his arms around me from behind and leans his head against my back.
‘I’m sorry. I’m just not in the mood today.
Shall we do something nice soon to make up for it? ’
I pause for a moment, wanting to make him sweat a bit. But finally I relent. ‘Sure, why not?’
Because that’s what I’m here for, isn’t it? The why not? It’s fun, it doesn’t matter, it’s chill.