Chapter 13
Chapter Thirteen
EMERSON
T he beautiful wedding gown I’m supposed to wear is hanging on a hook in my suite. Everything is laid out and ready for tomorrow. I love the dress but hate what it means for my future. I wish there was a way out, but I don’t see one.
I can’t put all my faith into Gideon. He doesn’t owe it to me to step in as some white knight. To make promises to me that he might not be able to live up to. Worse, that he would live up to them even if he didn't want to. I have no right to even ask.
It would be me making him do the same thing that is being done to me, and I won't do that to another person. I never get choices, but right now I have one. Tonight, I’m choosing to enjoy myself.
I pull out the key Gideon gave me. Throughout the rest of the evening, the key was my lifeline. I kept a tight hold on it, reminding myself that Gideon was close.
He was especially in my thoughts during the speech Conner's mother made.
Someone on the outside would have assumed that she and I were inseparable.
She even shed a few tears. The woman and I have only ever exchanged a few words, but she put on the performance of a lifetime.
I was told her speech was a tradition, but it all felt like a lie.
Thankfully, my eyes teared up right along with her.
Not because I was filled with joy, but because I knew it was a glimpse into my future.
Nothing about my life would ever be real; instead, it will be all for show.
That’s why tonight I'm choosing Gideon. He’s the only thing that feels real right now, and I want to cling to him.
Checking the time, I debate how long I should wait in my room before going to him.
I’m worried about running into someone in the hallway.
I check the peephole to see if the coast is clear, and my stomach drops when I see Conner.
Is he coming here? I still can’t believe I watched him do drugs.
I might be na?ve, but I’m not that na?ve.
He was using cocaine at our rehearsal dinner.
Through the peephole, I see Conner come closer, but then I spot a woman with him.
She stumbles toward him, and he half catches her as they both almost fall to the floor.
When they don’t, they break into laughter, and she kisses him.
She looks familiar, and I realize she was at the rehearsal dinner tonight.
After they make it to their suite, I wait a few more moments just to be sure. At least with him being drunk and doing whatever drugs he’s on, he’s not going to notice me slipping from my room. Why can’t he marry that girl instead?
Hurrying down the hallway, I still look over my shoulder the whole time.
Gideon's room is only one floor down, so I take the stairs. When I find his room, I don’t get the chance to use the key before the door swings open and he’s pulling me inside.
His mouth comes down onto mine as the door closes behind us and he presses me against it.
My legs wrap around his waist, and I grab him, trying to get closer.
I didn’t know this kind of passion was real, but that’s all I feel when he’s near me.
It’s in the way Gideon kisses me and how his touches are filled with possessiveness.
It makes me feel wanted for who I am and not for any other reason.
Being with me doesn’t benefit his social status or merge businesses.
He chose me in spite of all of that, and I’ve never felt more special.
"Missed you," Gideon says when his mouth begins to move down my neck.
"I missed you too.” I gasp when he nips at the tender skin. "But it was only an hour."
He lifts his head, his eyes meeting mine. “I miss you when you’re not close enough for me to touch.”
“You’re so freaking sweet. You know that?” He lets out a chuckle that rolls through his body into mine. I didn’t know a laugh could be sexy, but everything about Gideon is.
"No one has ever called me that before."
"I find that hard to believe." I lift my hand to stroke his cheek. His lips are a touch redder than normal from our kisses, and I brush my thumb over them. I can't imagine kissing anyone else but him, and I don’t want to.
"Maybe it's only for you." He turns his head to kiss my palm, and the touch is tender.
I love the idea that there is a part of Gideon that only belongs to me. God knows my heart will always belong to him. Maybe having something of his won’t make being apart so painful.
"Now what?" I wiggle in his hold, my sex rubbing against his hard cock.
"That can wait." He takes a step back and puts me on my feet. I want to jump into his arms again, but he takes my hand instead. "You didn't eat your dinner, so I'm going to feed you."
“I had a few bites,” I mumble, but he’s right. I basically pushed it around my plate.
“Not enough.” He leads me deeper into his suite, and I let out a gasp when I see what he has arranged in the living room.
The whole room is filled with candles, and the fireplace is lit.
Rose petals are scattered everywhere and on every surface, and a small circular dinner table has been prepared for us.
“You did this for me?” My eyes fill with tears at the sight of it. No one has ever done anything so special for me, let alone romantic.
“Don’t cry, precious,” he says, and I sniffle, trying to hold back the tears.
“This is too much,” I say, but his expression turns irritated. “You’re mad?”
“Not at you.” His face instantly softens. “This”—he waves his hand around the room—“took me no time at all. It was the least I could do. It pisses me off that a gesture so small can make you want to cry. It shouldn’t be that way, Emerson. You’re the kindest person I’ve ever met.”
“In all fairness, you don’t know me super well.” Our chemistry has been explosive since the instant we met, but we haven’t had a lot of time together.
"I don’t think you’re giving yourself enough credit. It's easy for me and everyone around you to see how sweet and good you are. You care about everyone even when they are assholes. It’s why your family takes advantage of you.”
"I know," I admit. "I wish I had more of a backbone, but I don't have that luxury."
"But you do." He makes it sound so easy. "Come on, let’s eat." Gideon pulls a chair out for me and gives me a wicked grin. "The least I can do is feed you before I feast on you again."
"Gideon." My cheeks heat at the memory, and I look down at my lap to hide it.
"Don't hide from me. Your blushes are as sweet as the rest of you." He uses one finger to lift my chin. “You’re so beautiful.”
“You’re not so bad either,” I tease, placing my napkin in my lap and watching him sit down. “Tell me things.”
“Things?”
“Yes, things.” I laugh as he reaches over and takes my hand. “Start with where you were born and go from there.”
His smile is playful as he begins talking.
We eat and talk, and I learn that Gideon didn’t grow up with money.
He went out and busted his ass to make a life for himself, and I can’t help but find it admirable.
He tells me stories from his childhood and then college.
I love hearing how close he is to his two best friends and how they started the firm together.
At some point we move to the couch where we sip wine and share stories. He asks me a million questions, and it feels like I’m talking non-stop, but it's so easy to talk to him. Natural, really. With the way we go back and forth, it feels like we’ve known each other for years.
“I bet your mom is proud of you,” I say, and he nods.
“She’ll adore you.” He seems so certain when he says it, and I don’t know how to respond.
He acts as though we have a future, but we can’t carry on an affair. I wouldn’t do that to Gideon. He’s a good man and deserves a woman who is educated and fits in. I might have experience with rich people, but I can barely function in the real world.
"Do you want a different path, Emerson?"
"I think that time has passed. College or whatever was never really offered to me."
"Do you want to go to college?"
"I don't know." I shrug. "Maybe I spent too much time reading cheesy romance novels because that's what I wanted for the future."
"How so?" Gideon's hand rests on my thigh, his fingers lazily stroking me.
"My parents' marriage is terrible, but I was able to see the possibility of love in romance books. I told myself one day I'd have that because I didn’t want the same life as my mother. Do you think that’s silly? That all I dreamed about for myself was love?"
“No, Emerson.” He tucks a piece of my hair behind my ear. “I think with your family it’s what anyone would dream of. We all want what we’re lacking in life.”
“But mine could have been an education. I could have dreamed of going to college, but I didn’t.”
“Not everyone needs to go to college, and there is nothing wrong with wanting traditional things. Maybe if you’d had love, you would have dreamed of something different, but the point is that it should be your choice. Your life shouldn’t be decided by others and forced on you.”
Gideon pulls me into his lap, and I rest my head on his shoulder, relaxing against him. For the first time in my life, I feel seen. It’s like he’s unlocked my soul and understands every part of it.
“Thank you,” I say, brushing my nose against his neck. I close my eyes, wanting to savor this moment. His fingers drift gently up and down my back, and I’ve never been more at peace.
“Don’t thank me,” he says, but it sounds like he’s far away. He’s warm against me, so I know he’s right here, but I’m too comfortable to lift my head.
When I open my eyes again, bright light is streaming around me, and I’m in Gideon’s bed. I jerk awake and glance next to me, but he’s not there.
“Holy shit.” I jump out of bed and try to remember what happened. Gideon was holding me and then it was lights out. I must have fallen asleep on him and he put me in his bed.
Where the heck did he go? I want to talk to him, but what if he left the hotel? Maybe he doesn’t want to see me get married to another man. I can’t blame him. The thought of never seeing Gideon again makes a deep ache throb in my chest.
I search the room like he could be hiding under the bed before I have no choice but to go back to my own room. Time’s up, and I have to face my fate.