36. Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Five
Trix
As I'm cleaning the tables in the bar, waiting for Emery to pick me up to take me to Michaels for dinner, Mouse leisurely walks down the stairs. He pauses at the bottom, ambling there for a few seconds, then makes his way to the bar stools.
I'm shocked, to say the least, because he's been avoiding me lately.
Finishing the table, I move toward him, then round the bar and put the wet cloth on the side.
Tapping my nails against the wood, I look at him to find him already staring at me, his eyes shrouded with guilt.
"Are you okay, Mouse?"
He gulps, fidgeting in his seat, then he shakes his head.
Crinkles form above his brows, and he wipes his hands along his jeans.
"I'm sorry."
Frowning, I lean over the bar and gently place my hand on his arm, stopping him from rubbing them raw.
"What do you have to be sorry for?"
"It was my fault," he says, eyes glistening with tears. "You got hurt because of me."
My eyes dart back and forth between his.
"When my dad hurt me?" I ask, confused as to what he's talking about.
He nods, chin trembling slightly when he takes a deep breath.
"Mouse, my dad hurting me had nothing to do with you."
"I was the reason you went back there!" he shouts, pushing away from the bar, and almost tripping over the stool as it crashes to the ground.
Realization dawns, and I immediately shake my head, hurrying around the bar until I'm standing in front of him.
Grabbing his hands in mine, I squeeze them tight, waiting for him to look at me.
"You can't blame yourself for me going back there.
It was my choice. I knew what I was getting myself into by lying to everyone around me.
It's my own fault for not telling anyone the truth about the situation I was in.
You did the right thing by confronting me, Mouse.
Please, don't blame yourself for what happened. "
A tear dribbles down his cheek, and I quickly reach up and swipe it away.
"Is this why you've been avoiding me?" I ask. "Because you felt guilty?"
He nods. "I'm sorry."
Tugging him forward, I wrap my arms around him and rub my hands along the length of his back.
"I promise you, I don't blame you in any way for what happened, and you shouldn't blame yourself, either. The only person at fault is my father. He should be the only person feeling guilty. Not you. Not me. Him."
He sighs, and finally returns my hug, squeezing me against his broad chest.
"Him," he whispers. "Not me. Him."
My phone blaring through the room pulls us apart, and I shoot Mouse an apologetic look as I pull my phone from my pocket and accept Emery's call.
"I'm almost there," she sings, music thumping in the background. "Do you want me to drive up to the clubhouse, or wait at the end of the road?"
"Just wait at the end," I tell her. "I'll start walking now."
Ending the call, I pocket my phone and rush back behind the bar to grab my purse.
"I'm sorry, I have to go. But when I get back later, I'll find you, okay?"
Mouse nods, saluting me as I pass him, and I hurry out the double doors and down the porch steps, eager to get to Emery.
There's a weird vibe in the air tonight, and I have no idea why.
For the past two hours, Michael hasn't said more than six words to me, and that was to tell me dinner would be ready at five.
Since I've walked in here, he's stayed in the kitchen, and Emery and I have been in the living room, watching some silly show she's been bingeing lately.
The smell of roasted chicken wafts through the house, but it doesn't bring me comfort like it usually would. Instead, it's turning my stomach.
"Is your dad okay?" I ask Emery as I nudge her.
She shrugs, hardly paying me any attention as two girls on the screen start arguing back and forth.
Huffing, I get up from the couch and hesitantly walk into the kitchen, leaning against the door frame.
Michael moves from the sink to the stove, a large pan in his hands filled almost to the brim with water.
I wait for him to set it down before I speak, not wanting to cause an accident.
"Is everything okay, Mike?"
He briefly glances at me, nods, and then returns to the task at hand.
Brows drawn down, I walk further into the kitchen and pull out a chair from the small square table in the middle of the room.
"Is something wrong?"
He sighs deeply, then sets down the spoon in his hand and turns to face me, crossing his arms over his chest.
"When were you going to tell me you were working at the old farmhouse with those degenerates?"
My eyes widen, head rearing back in shock.
"Degenerates?" I mutter, shaking my head. "You mean the Steel Devils boys?"
He scoffs and shakes his head, disgust splashed across his face.
"You shouldn't be associating with people like that, Trix. I can understand you needed a job, but are you really desperate enough to put yourself in a position where you're surrounded by criminals?"
I stare at him in utter disbelief.
"Are you fucking serious?"
"Trix, I don't mean to offend you, sweetheart, but I just don't agree with what you're doing. You need to think about all of this properly."
"You don't even know them!" I shout as I stand from the table and step back, creating more distance between us. "You make it sound like they're animals."
Emery shuffles into the kitchen, eyes pinging back and forth between me and her father.
"You're the one who doesn't know them, Trix. They're terrible people, and they do awful things. I don't want you involved with them, and I'm advising you to get far away from them."
I shake my head, then take another step back.
"I know exactly who they are, and I know what they do. None of them are evil. They've all been dealt a shitty hand in life, just like I have. They've come together, created their own family, and found something in life that gives them all a purpose."
"Being around them means you're putting yourself in danger."
"I've been in danger my whole life!" Shaking my head, I glance at Emery, who's standing there quietly staring at the floor, then back to Michael.
"I appreciate your concern, but I'm old enough to make my own decisions, and I don't need your input to decide how to live my life.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've lost my appetite. "
Spinning around, I walk through the living room to the front door, slide on my shoes, and exit the house.
Walking down the street, I hear Emery's feet slapping against the ground behind me.
"Trix, wait up!"
I slow, waiting for her to catch up. When she's by my side, I send her a scathing glare.
"What the hell was that, Em?"
She flails her arms in the air. "I'm sorry. I knew he wasn't happy about you working at the clubhouse, but I didn't think he was going to be rude, and ambush you like that."
"You could've given me a heads-up! I didn't even know he knew, let alone the fact that he wasn't happy about it."
She huffs, dropping her arms and letting them slap against her thighs.
"He's just concerned. He cares about you, Trix, and he wants to make sure you're safe."
"Well, you can tell him I'm much safer there than I am at the trailer park!"
Her brows draw down, casting shadows over her light blue eyes.
"Why aren't you safe at the trailer park?"
Oh, shit.
Sighing, I chew on the inside of my cheek, glance around the street, then focus on my best friend.
"My dad came back. Let's just say, he wasn't too happy to see me." Her eyes widen, and her jaw goes slack. I point at my face. "Why do you think I'm wearing makeup?"
"He hurt you, didn't he?"
I nod, and she gasps as she steps toward me and gently grabs my arms.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
I shrug. "I didn't want you to know. I was embarrassed, and I didn't want to be a burden."
Her eyes dart between mine, and she frowns.
"So, are you staying at the clubhouse, then?"
Flattening my lips, I nod again.
"Reeve wasn't happy when he saw my face. He went after my dad, then demanded I leave the trailer park and move into the clubhouse. I've been staying there for the past week."
"And you didn't tell me?"
I sigh. "I didn't feel like I could. You didn't have the best reaction to me working there, let alone if I told you I'd moved in. If it helps, I haven't told Liam, either. He doesn't know anything. I left you both in the dark about it all because I didn't want you both to know I failed."
She releases a dry laugh.
"Why in the hell would you think you've failed?"
"Because I'm meant to be standing on my own two feet, living life by myself, not relying on other people to help me get by. I haven't managed to do that."
She tuts, then places a tender hand over my face and shakes her head.
"I don't want to hear another word. You are living life by yourself and standing on your own two feet.
It may not have been exactly how you planned it, but no one's life ever is.
Who cares if you've accepted some help along the way.
Everyone needs a helping hand in life at some point.
You're one of the toughest people I know, Trix, and nothing you do could ever disappoint me.
I will always be proud of you, and you should be proud of yourself too. "
My vision blurs, eyes burning with tears.
"I hate when you're so sappy like this," I blurt, wiping at my face before the tears can fall.
Laughing, she wraps her arms around me and pulls me into a tight hug.
"You love it, really. Now, come on, let's get you home."
We don't speak on the way back to the clubhouse. The only sound in the car is the music thrumming through the speakers at a low volume, filling the space around us.
As we start driving up the long, winding road, past the trailer park, sadness washes over me, knowing Reeve isn't at the clubhouse, waiting for me.
I turn to Emery.
"Are you busy tomorrow?"
She shakes her head. "I have a class tomorrow morning, but I'm not doing anything after that."
"Do you know if Liam's busy?"
"Honestly, I haven't spoken to him lately. He's been studying non-stop, so we haven't spent much time together."
I sigh and glance out the window as we reach the clubhouse.
With my stomach in knots, I look back to my best friend.
I think it's time I'm honest with her and Liam about everything.
"Can you try to get him to come to your apartment tomorrow? I think it's about time I talk to you both, not only about my dad, but also about the feelings I'm developing for Reeve. I don't want to keep lying to everyone."
Her head whips around, and she stares at me with wide eyes.
"You have feelings for Liam's brother? Oh my God… wait! Is he the grumpy tattooed hunk you were referring to in your messages?"
Cringing, I nod.
"I feel awful about it, but I just can't help myself."
She laughs and shakes her head as she pulls the car to a stop outside the clubhouse.
"Trix, you shouldn't feel bad. We can't always control who we fall for. I'm sure Liam will understand."
"I'm just worried he won't."
"Well, I'll make sure he's at my apartment tomorrow, and I'll be there as moral support for when you tell him. I've got your back. Always."
Reaching over the center console to hug her, I squeeze her tight, then press a quick kiss against the side of her head.
"Thank you, Em."
Pulling on the handle, I open the car door and climb out, then grab my bag from the footwell and hoist it over my shoulder.
"Dad will come around, you know?"
Pausing, I look at my best friend, noticing the hopeful glint in her eyes, and although I know Michael will never be accepting of me being around the Steel Devils, I nod and smile softly at her.
"Yeah, maybe he will."
Waving my fingers goodbye, I close the door and trudge over to the porch steps, huffing as I reach the top and open the door to the empty bar.
One more day, then Reeve will be back.
With disappointment coursing through my veins, I slowly make my way up the stairs and through the living room to Reeve's bedroom.
Pulling my phone from my pocket, I check for any messages from Reeve as I push the door open and kick my shoes off, groaning when I see no new ones.
"Something wrong, Red?"
I jump, head snapping up. I gasp when I see Reeve sitting on the edge of his bed with a cheeky smile spread across his handsome face.
My eyes scan the length of him, running over his dark, tousled hair, down to his electric blue eyes that are twinkling with mirth. He rubs a large, inked hand over his thick beard, and my gaze catches on his dusty-pink lips.
His leather cut is tight around his shoulders, accentuating the muscles in his arms, and the light gray top he's wearing makes the dark tattoos littering his skin stand out.
My gaze drops to the black denim jeans stretched across his thighs before darting back up to his face to study his features again.
"You're really here," I mutter, still not confident he's not a figment of my imagination.
He chuckles and pushes himself up from the bed, standing only a few feet away from me.
"I couldn't bear being away from you for another day. As soon as the deal was done and I was sure everyone would be okay without me, I rode back by myself. I needed to be back here… with you."
A smile splits across my face. I hurriedly walk toward him, lift onto my tiptoes, and wrap my hands around the back of his neck.
He ducks down, arms circling my waist, and we both lean toward each other until our lips connect.