Chapter 7 #2
I tried over and over again, sending a few texts saying to call right now and Aurora wasn’t in a stable place. Honestly, I couldn’t think of a single reason that he wasn’t answering.
Except apparently, he was handling Aurora mentally breaking.
We pulled up to the condo and somehow Ellie knew where she was, glancing up. “Fuck, she’s on the roof.”
“How do—” I started to ask, but she was already at the front door and all I cared about was Aurora.
Not how her stepdaughter knew where she was. It was just useful in that moment.
As much as I wanted to race up the stairs, it was a thirty-story building and realistically it was smarter to wait for the elevator when there were two of them. I wasn’t the only one who looked ready to tear out their hair which honestly shocked me about her daughter.
“Finally,” Theresa growled as the elevator dinged. We got on and she hit the button. “You have keys to the roof, right?”
“No, but there’s a garden,” Ellie answered, sighing when Theresa shot her a look. “I thought it was peaceful for her because she liked the coven fields. I didn’t think…”
“You couldn’t have known,” Alexis muttered. “We all had different pieces. Fix first, blame and drink our guilt away later.”
Good, at least they were going to feel guilty, not just me.
I was the first off the elevator and followed the extreme distress I felt knowing it was her.
“Please, Aurora, don’t leave me with the guilt of this,” Xavier was gently saying to her. Relief filled his eyes when he saw us.
“The one time I want to be selfish and…” She trailed off when she registered that he’d changed and slowly turned and looked at us. Fresh tears filled her eyes. “My life will never be my own, not even when I can stop suffering it. Now you will just lock me up again.”
I bellowed her name when she made a break for it and tried for the edge even with Xavier so close to her. The guy easily scooped her up and I sank to my knees in relief.
“I should have jumped from the carriage,” she repeated softly, crushing me.
“I don’t know what that means,” Ellie muttered.
“Do you know anything about her?” I choked out as I pushed to stand and spun on her. “She got scared after she was sold as a child and tried to jump out of the carriage on the journey.” I growled when they gave me blank looks. “While traveling along a cliff.”
I ignored them and went to Aurora when Xavier sat her on the bench, hating the detached way she sort of registered me.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. “Don’t leave me.”
“I can’t live with them knowing my shame,” she mumbled, not focusing on me. “It was better they just hated me.”
“Aurora, please, it’s not your shame,” I begged. I didn’t know what to do when she shook her head. “Okay, we’ll leave, beauty. Forget the court case and divorce. We’ll just go. We don’t have to stay in Atlanta or by ASH. I can get a job anywhere. We’ll just—”
She focused on me then and reached out to touch my face but dropped her hand. “You are such a good man. I won’t ruin your life too.”
I cupped her hand and brought it to my cheek. “You are the only one who sees that. That’s why you’re good. You see what others can’t. You see the kid I was and how I was manipulated.” I gestured to the others. “They see the man who did wrong and don’t care the reason. You care. You do.
“You are the only one ever who has said you’re sorry for the boy I was. I need that, Aurora. Please don’t make me lose that. I need you, okay?” I choked on a sob. “How could you just come say goodbye to me like that? I wouldn’t recover from that. None of us would and—”
“You would. I bring nothing to—”
“That’s not true,” I shouted. “I heard about the benefit. You were the one who thought to use women who have gone through the Amanda’s Hope program as caterers.
To show how people who get help shine. It’s your time to shine, Aurora.
Please, ask for help. Stop shouldering it all because you have sinned. Your sins aren’t as bad as you think!”
I broke down, begging her to listen to me and not give up as tears rolled down my cheeks. To please fight a bit longer and see this wasn’t her shame but what was done to her.
I wasn’t sure if it was working, but then I fought dirty, knowing what someone good would react to.
That they were needed.
I mopped up my face and made her focus on me.
“I have magic on me. My adoptive parents put magic on me.” Concern instantly filled her eyes and she wasn’t lost in her head.
“That super powerful witch at ASH confirmed it. They bound my lion somehow. He comes out, but—it’s done damage to me.
I’ll be a mess if they take it off and I could die if they don’t. ”
“How could they do that to a child?” she demanded, rage filling her eyes. “How does—what do they have to do? What is the recovery?”
“I don’t know,” I admitted. “I got scared and walked out. I was going to tell you after we finished talking and—” I was so touched that she cared so much when I was such a useless piece of shit that I lost my head for a moment and kissed her. Just a soft brush of our lips and then another.
But she didn’t respond.
I pulled back and horror filled me when she looked as if I’d just slapped her, more tears and agony in her eyes.
“So nothing has changed,” she whispered, lowering her head. “You said men ask now, but they don’t and still just take what they want.”
“No, I said some do and it’s—we’re not property to—” Ellie started to explain.
“I’ll ask,” I blurted, completely taking my hands off of her.
“I’ll ask for everything. I’m sorry, I should have asked.
I’ll ask to touch—I asked to hug you before, right?
I—this was—I was—I won’t mess up again. I’ll ask even to look at you, okay.
Please, I’m sorry. Please don’t hate me for pushing you—the kiss or talking—I didn’t want you to get blindsided. ”
And for maybe the first time in my entire life, no matter what had happened to me, I broke down ugly sobbing.
It so wasn’t about me right then and I knew that, but realizing what the puzzle had been before me and what Aurora had intended to do…
If Xavier hadn’t been there to stop her or figure it out… I really wouldn’t have recovered.
No matter what Aurora thought.
“What do you mean blindsided?” she asked quietly as she reached out and took my hand in hers.
I tried to mop up my face and get my shit together.
“When you go to court for something like damages, it’s an all-access pass to your life, Aurora.
You have to give over everything to prove what they did damaged you.
That’s medical records—everything.” I nodded when understanding filled her eyes. “And a lot of it is…”
She gave me a sad smile. “You were on the other side of it before. You were the mean one tearing into people like me.”
“Yes,” I whispered. “I was, and I would immediately use what you told me. You said your family knew and they will use that. I’m sorry.
That’s not why I told you to tell—I thought your group could help you and they would tell you that or I could figure out more, find out when your next hearing was or whatever.
But you told Alexis—she’s trying to help. ”
“He’s right, Aurora,” Alexis said as she moved up next to me. “Creed is completely right and protecting you. We both are. I know this will be hard, but trust me if you never trust me again that you have been through so much worse. I know this feels so much worse because—”
“Because for a moment you had hope,” I interrupted.
“I know. I know. I came here and that hope was taken away. You gave it back to me, beauty. Please, let me give it back to you too. Trust me this time and I will give you that hope like you did by telling Ellie. I’ll tell them and set them straight. I’ll handle this.”
She studied me quietly. “There’s no chance you kissed me on a whim but really like men, right?”
I did not see that coming in all the responses I could have possibly considered. “No, I’m sorry if I gave some indication that I liked men, but I don’t.” I frowned, completely confused.
“Oh, that’s a shame,” she whispered, seeming lost again. “I was really hoping you did.”
I felt like she kicked me in the nuts, and I opened my mouth to ask why she blushed if she didn’t like the way I looked, but stopped when Alexis moved her hand to my shoulder.
“Or Creed seems like a good guy and will probably be willing to speak with a trauma counselor at ASH and learn how to be in a healthy relationship and help a survivor of extensive sexual abuse, Aurora. You deserve to have the perks of being a woman, especially you who has had all the suffering of one.”
She frowned and focused on Alexis. “You think one could really fix me to want men like that? I never have even if I find them pleasing to look at.”
“Because you were a child when you were first raped,” Alexis whispered.
“And yes, I’ve seen it. I know someone not at ASH even who has worked miracles with people.
” She swallowed loudly. “She worked miracles with me and now I have a healthy sexual appetite and not a day goes by that I don’t think the work I put in was worth it. ”
Aurora studied Alexis for several moments. “You truly know, don’t you?”
“Yes, I do. I also know you have one question circling that seems to be holding you back. Just ask. I promise—I understand now and I will help you, doll.”
That seemed to be what Aurora needed to hear.
“How do I open up to the group and not make them feel like I did Creed? Like his trauma was insignificant because it wasn’t as much as mine?
It’s not worth my healing to hurt the healing of others.
That’s why I can’t talk in those meetings, and I’m stuck. ”
I looked over my shoulder at Ellie and Theresa, taking in their shocked expressions… And that’s why I was furious with both of them and thought they were entitled, spoiled brats.
Yes, they were wronged.
Yes, they acknowledged they could never see Aurora clearly.
But it was right in front of their fucking faces that Aurora would burn for strangers to help them and they painted her the villain of everything and for everyone.
Which honestly made them villains in Aurora’s story too. In a way, it really did.