12. Chapter 12
“ D o you think you can tear yourself away from that adorable ball of fur for a night?” Rafael demanded as he danced into my room.
I looked up from where I’d been taunting the kitten with a mouse on a long string. “I can’t leave Charlie for a whole night, Raf.”
“He’d survive, Annie.” Rafael rolled his eyes. “Not sure our sofas would, but that’s another issue. You need to trim his nails again.” Then, he leaned down to pet Charlie, and in a baby voice, he said, “What a troublesome brat, the cutest ever though.”
“He’s not ready to be on his own at night,” I said firmly. “Besides, where would I go?”
“Rainn wants to go out, but I had to tell him no because Joel is sick and I’m playing nurse.”
“You want me to babysit Rainn at the bar?”
“Hey, I heard that!” Rainn said, coming into the room and sounding annoyed. “He’s lying. I don’t even want to go anyway.”
“You need to go,” Rafael insisted. “Both of you do. You’re stuck here far too much.” He sighed dramatically. “Fine, I’ll have Joel come over here, and we’ll babysit the hellcat, I mean, Charlie. ”
Rainn and I looked at each other and sighed. He was thinking the same thing I was: The energy we’d expend arguing with Rafael wouldn’t be worth it. We might as well go out. “I guess maybe it could be fun.”
“Right then. Let me just go text Joel, and then I’ll watch this guy while you go have fun without us. And you’d better have fun. I don’t want you home early, you hear me?” He smirked at us and winked at Charlie.
“Tell me you love my cat without telling me you love my cat,” I called out as Rafael strolled out of the room.
Rainn sat on the bed with a thoughtful expression. “He is pretty darn adorable. Who wouldn’t love him?”
“I know, right? That’ll be my future litmus test for the guys I date. Love me? Love my cat!” I laughed. “Well, I suppose I’d better start getting ready. Getting you drunk is actually going to be fun, I think.”
“Uh-uh,” he said, elbowing me. “I’m getting you drunk. I’ll drive.”
“I’m driving,” Rafael said, poking his head in. “So you can both get drunk. Laid too, if you want.”
I rolled my eyes as I rubbed under Charlie’s chin, which he enjoyed immensely until he started to bite.
“You just want the apartment to yourself for a whole night. But it might not be as fun as you think, with this little ball of energy.” I put Charlie down and stood up.
“Also, why is it that everyone hears everything that’s said in my room?
Twice you guys have overheard each other’s conversations in here within the last, like, 10 minutes. ”
They looked at me blankly, and then Rainn groaned.
“We didn’t plan this, if that’s what you’re thinking.
I’m as reluctant as you to go out. But I’ll be a good sport.
Let’s do this. I’ll take one for the team,” he added as he walked out of my room, presumably to go change and do whatever minimal grooming he needed to do.
“Uh-oh, it’s a sports metaphor kind of night,” I said. “Now look what you’ve done, Raf.”
Rafael smiled. “You can handle it. You might even have fun.” Then his expression became more serious.
“I’ll be straight with you, Annie. The run-in with Kylan last week and then the thing with Viviana this week—well, they’ve been messing with your head a little.
You have been trying your very best not to let it, by burying yourself in work, but I can see it.
You know it’s there. I think getting out and having fun, maybe meeting someone new, may help. At least for the night, you know?”
“I sure hope so,” I said. There was no point denying it.
He was partly right. Though not so much about Viviana.
I’d decided to give her a bit of time to cool off before approaching her again, but approach her I would.
I missed my friend. I was the new and improved Annie, right?
I could figure out this female friendship thing—could it really be that hard?
But as for Kylan, Rafael’s assessment was spot on, as usual.
I had managed to devote most of my time, energy, and attention this week to working on bookstore plans and ballet choreography, but in the rare moments of quiet without work or roommates or social media to distract me, he came rushing into my thoughts, his face burned into my mind, memories rushing back, feelings coming to the fore.
And mortification too, given my ridiculous behavior of escaping into a pet store of all things.
“All right, are you going to help me choose an outfit or not?”
Rafael sighed in relief as he picked up Charlie. “I thought you’d never ask. I have to go pick up Joel soon, so we do have to make this quicker than usual. No time for a montage, unfortunately.”
“First world problems, Raf.”
“Shut up.”
I leaned on the bar and nudged Rainn, nearly cheek to cheek. “What about that tall, black-haired goddess with the hot guy in the grey striped top?”
“Uh, they’re awfully close. I think they’re together ,” he said, a slight slur in his words.
“Nope,” I said. “I’m sensing friend vibes. Maybe even brother/sister. Go talk to her.” I tried to shove him sideways off the chair, but he was too bulky.
He grinned. “Nice try. If they’re just friends, then why don’t you go approach the guy?”
“Well, I … is … ” I paused. “Words are hard.”
“Have we had too much to drink already?”
“Oh, we definitely have. But not enough to go hit on some random, apparently.”
Rainn threw back another shot. “There might not be enough alcohol in the bar for that.”
I draped my arm across his shoulders. “Aww. That bad, Rainn? Please tell me about her.”
He grunted and then waved to the bartender for another. “There’s not enough alcohol in the bar for that either.”
“Oh, come on.” I stuck out my lower lip. “It’s just you and me. I won’t tell Rafael. If you won’t tell me her name, tell me something about her. Anything.”
He was quiet for a long time, and I didn’t think he was going to indulge my curiosity. But finally, while staring into his glass, he muttered, “She’s way out of my league.”
That was not at all what I expected him to say.
“What? Impossible. You’re a catch by anyone’s standards.
Look at you. I constantly regret the fact that we’re not attracted to each other at all.
” We’d tried one awkward date, not long after being introduced through Rafael.
After dinner and a chaste goodnight kiss, both of us had admitted to feeling a total lack of romantic potential.
But great friends we had become. And I was certain he’d make a perfect partner for the right woman someday.
He had dated here and there, but rarely did his relationships last very long.
Rainn put his head on my shoulder. “Thanks, Annie, but trust me on this one. I don’t just mean she’s out of my league in terms of looks, though she’s beautiful too.”
I looked at him quizzically. “I don’t get it. It’s not like you’re all brawn and no brains. You’re the new IT manager, and you have a master’s in software engineering—if that doesn’t make you smart as hell, I don’t know what does.”
He waved his hand dismissively. “I mean, I’m good at what I do. But this is a literary agency. Some of these people read, like, James Joyce and Faulkner, I can’t even remember his first name. It’s a whole other league, you know?”
“Hmm, I don’t know. I wouldn’t consider myself in a different league from you, and I read those authors in college. I even liked some of Faulkner.”
He looked at me doubtfully and sighed. “You just need to trust me on this one. Even if somehow she was attainable, she’s probably not available.”
I gasped. “Wait a minute, go back to the agency thing. She works with you? That is a fairly important detail!”
“Uh, I thought I mentioned that to you guys before.”
I searched my memories. “Hmm … it’s possible you did. I might’ve been distracted. But that’s a whole new level of interesting.”
“I mean, we both work at the agency, but we work in different departments. No regular interactions.”
I nodded. “Because her job is …”
Rainn shook his head with a lopsided smile. “Not falling for that. I’m not that drunk. But it’s cute that you tried.”
“I had to try.”
“And what about Kylan?”
My smile faltered, and my words slurred a bit. “W–w–what about him?”
“What are you going to do?”
I stared at Rainn. “I don’t know what you’re asking. What is there to do , other than hope we don’t run into each other again? I can’t guarantee that unless I … like, move to another country or become a hermit. It’s tempting, but a little extreme, even for me.”
He searched my face and stared for a long moment. “Annie, is that what you want? To just hope you never cross paths? ”
“I—well—”
“Haven’t you even thought about trying to reach out?”
I swallowed with some difficulty, beginning to wish I had some water to drink instead of another shot. “I don’t … no, I haven’t.” I shook my head, feeling a bit queasy. “No, I haven’t considered that. What’s the point?”
“The point,” Rainn said, studying me far too closely, “is closure. This stuff with him has been tearing you up for years. It’s driving you crazy even now.
Maybe talking to him would help bring you some peace, finally …
I don’t know.” He chuckled. “I mean, I’m no expert, just an IT guy, and a drunk one at that, but closure is what you’re supposed to find in the rom-coms, right? Worth a shot.”
I shot him a dubious look. “I—I don’t know. I really think he’d just refuse to talk.”
“But would that really be worse than where you’re at now?” he asked.
“Oh, it could definitely be worse. If he did agree to talk, it wouldn’t be some magical healing conversation but just something to open old wounds and make me feel even worse.
I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it.
Let’s just … talk about something else.” I shook my bracelets on my wrist. “Tell me about the agency. What’s it called again? ”
“Franchersantz Agency.”
“Fran–cha–what?”
“It’s a made-up name that combines all the founders’ names.
Kind of cool but also kind of unfortunate, if you ask me.
Franchersantz.” Rainn smiled. “It’s a cool place to work though.
I like it so far. You know, I’ve actually been meaning to ask if you’ve thought about agency work.
You’re interested in book publishing, and obviously literary agencies are a key part of that.
I don’t know all the ins and outs of what positions and duties there are, since I’m just an IT guy, but I could find out if there’s anything that might interest you.
Or you could go on the Franchersantz website under the Careers page.
No, scratch that. Let me find out for you—I’ve got a good friend in HR, the one who referred me to the place.
Remember Robin Johnson? You met him a few months back.
Anyway, maybe with my connections, I can get you an interview faster or something.
” He scratched his head. “Sorry, that was a ramble and a half. Don’t mean to be pushy. ”
My jaw was nearly on the table. “No, I … can’t believe I never thought of that.
You work in a freaking literary agency. This could be an amazing connection for me, Rainn !
Yes, please do whatever you need to do to hook me up with something there, however menial.
I’ll do third-shift toilet cleaning if I have to. ”
“Anything for you, my sweet,” he said. “Ugh, why couldn’t we be soulmates? Not even a tiny spark. Stupid fate.” Then his eyes widened in alarm. “And don’t you ever tell Rafael I got drunk enough to think about a ‘soulmate,’ much less utter the word. I’d never live it down.”
I stood up and started bobbing my head as I tried to pull him off his stool. “Come on, Rainn. I think this calls for some of our hot BFF moves.”
“Can we even stand up straight enough for this?” he asked doubtfully as we clasped hands.
I bent back and spun around, and I smiled. “We don’t have to stand up straight—that’s the great thing about dancing.”