Chapter Twelve
Chapter Twelve
As she pushed open the door to her small apartment, Rakell’s nervous system was zinging. Bernardo’s word, impressive, was lighting up in her brain like it had been written in the sky with sparklers. She kept whispering it to herself, making sure she absorbed it. She tossed the duffle bag to the floor, anxious to call the person she wished she could tell everything, the one she knew would be excited that her dreams were becoming a reality. She ached to call her dad, but she shrugged that off… couldn’t let her brain go there. Then the thought hit, the comeuppance she’d feel when she landed a major role and could prove her mom’s declaration wrong. “When this doesn’t work, you’ll be back, Rae.”
“No, Mom, I won’t…I’ll never go back, never,” she hushed to herself. As the thought of her mom’s words shattered her excitement, she was saved by her phone lighting up, a Facetime call. “Matt!” she yelped, wishing she could jump through the phone and hug him.
Jonathon and Matt mirrored her enthusiasm about the audition. Jonathon declared that he was treating himself to ‘the good’ Champagne tonight. “I love you guys. Jonathon, thank you for always making me feel high on life! Oh, and Matt, I really appreciate your sage advice,” she snickered.
Jonathon roared, then whispered as if Matt wasn’t temple to temple with him, “Rakell, I hear your code. He’s like a wise old man. Matt is the perfect example that 30 is the new 60.”
Rakell laughed at Matt's stern face just as Jonathon said, “Opening Champagne in your honor tonight, Rakell.” He shifted his eyes toward Matt. “Old man, you're welcome to join me.”
She giggled, hoping she’d be joining them soon. This felt so close, so real. “All right, you two, I love you, but I don’t know anything for sure yet. I’ll call you when I hear…hopefully, you can open the really good stuff.” Just as she set her phone down, it lit up again.
Lana : Hey, can I call you? … Send
Rakell : Sure … Send
“Hi, I’m so ginned up after the audition,” Rakell spit out before Lana could get a word in.
“I bet you are. Um, you’re on speaker. Levi’s here…we wanted to…first, I’m excited for you,” Lana said, her forced enthusiasm halting the bounce in Rakell’s step as she paced back and forth. “Have you told Jake?” she added dryly.
What the hell? The fa?ade in Lana’s light voice, coupled with the way Levi cleared his throat at Lana’s question, pricked at the back of her neck. “Uh, yes, he knows. I was at his house when I got the original call, and I texted him after the interview. But why…I mean, are you two making sure I’m being a good girlfriend to Jake?” she asked sarcastically. What’s going on?
Lana groaned. “No, Rakell, we know you guys are figuring stuff out but…huh...”
“Hi, Rakell,” Levi interjected, “I guess Jake didn’t share this with you, but I think I should.”
“What, did something happen, is Jake…” Rakell croaked, her chest tightening. “What’s…”
“No, nothing like that. It’s just that…” His pause was careful, making Rakell more anxious.
“Levi, spit it out. What’s up?”
Levi interrupted her urgent words with a long sigh. “Jake knows Bernardo. They haven’t met, but in general. Let me share an old Instagram post with you. It will clarify our concern, what we are not doing a good job saying right now.”
The text picture came through. Rakell glimpsed it, taking in a young woman with black shoulder-length hair and big, brown eyes, nestled on Bernardo’s shoulder, smiling like a Cheshire cat at the camera. The angle made Rakell think it was a selfie, while Bernardo’s eyes were cast toward her. She had to be in her twenties…but he was known for dating younger actresses, that wasn’t an anomaly in Hollywood. “So, I see Bernardo with a younger woman. I’m pretty sure there are oodles of pictures like this, but what does Jake have to do…”
With a sigh, Levi interrupted: “Look at the name of the account, the woman. It’s…”
“Jessica Ortiz. Oh yeah, she’s the actress slated to play in the new superhero series alongside…yeah, I know the name. Wait, Jessica Ortiz.” That name conjured a feeling of familiarity but not enough to bring any realization. “Wait, she…did Jake date her?” She searched for the date on the post. Was this the girl?
“Yes, Jessica Ortiz. She and Jake were dating. I mean, no one thought it would last, but she publicly broke up with him, using that post along with others from Nobu, and it was with…”
Rakell couldn’t force back the gasp that rushed from her, panic gripping her throat, her stomach swirling with acid. “Oh fuck, it was with Bernardo Cappuccino…Jessica is the other woman he ENDED. The one that was permanent.” She struggled to get more words out from her constricted throat. “Ohhh. Oh, shit. Levi, he didn’t say anything, nothing…but I knew something was wrong. He didn’t seem like he’d slept at all the night after I got the call about the audition. Fuck, fuck, fuck.” She gulped air, sitting on the edge of her bed, trying to run the past few days through her head. “He didn’t say anything.” The elation from the audition evaporated, and in its wake, angst. Did Bernardo know, is that why he’d spoken to her in that cocky, salacious way? Had he been taunting her? Her brain shifted back to Jake, understanding that he was putting himself aside, not interfering with her opportunity despite how he had to be reeling internally. Her eyes clamped shut, emotion aching to be released. “Oh, I can’t believe he did this. He didn’t…he…” The words to explain what Jake’s action meant to her were out of her grasp…it was the action of love. Someone can say they love you, but when they push their fears aside to clear the path for your dreams, that was love lived. It was something far more profound and encompassing than love said. But she was still unsure of how to react to this knowledge.
“Rakell,” Levi started, gravity to his voice, “I can’t claim that Jake’s my best friend, but I have known him a long time, interviewed him dozens of times, and I can tell you after that happened, he has consistently refused to talk about her. He literally said to me, ‘If you interview me, I’m suggesting you don’t ask about her. If you do, that will be my last interview with you.’ And if you're me, who wants access to one of the best quarterbacks of our time and an all-around decent guy, you listen—because you don’t jeopardize that kind of relationship, and since no one was speculating they were going to get married or anything, she was just another…”
“I think what Levi is saying,” Lana interjected, “is that Jake wasn’t really attached to her, but he is to you…obviously, and we just thought you should know. I think he’s trying not to mess up your audition, but he has to feel…”
“I have to go. I need Jonathon to help me with something. I, I need…Jake to know that I’m standing up for him, that he’s on my mind. Shit, Lana, I don’t know how to…” Her words scrambled along with her thoughts as she slid off the edge of her bed to the floor.
“It’s okay, we just wanted you to know. Sorry we put a dent in the excitement. We…”
“No, it’s…I want to do this right, he needs to know. Thank you for telling me. Okay, bye.” The rush of thoughts, what was going through Jake’s head? She had so many questions, but what could she do? How did she let him know she cared about him deeply…saying, I love you too, seemed like a contrived reaction.
Rakell looked at her watch. Jake’s at dinner right now with Dwayne and the coaches , she thought, pushing on Jonathon's contact. She wanted to get this done fast. “Jonathon, hey I need you to help me do something.”
“Hey, Rakell, are you okay?”
“Yes, I mean, I’m not sure.” She detailed the story to him, and even in her panicked state, his over-the-top expressive reactions like “Girl, this is better than the Housewives of Beverly Hills ,” and “Oh no, she didn’t,” and “Women are crazy, don’t they know they’re signing up for pushing a wheelchair sooner rather than later,” made her face stretch with a grin. She had an idea, and Jonathon was more than eager to comply.
“I’m on it, Princess. Text me all of them. Can I use some photos from the Sports Illuminated shoot and, of course, a few of you with Matt and me?”
After they finished discussing the details, she let the phone drop to the floor, pulling her legs to her chest, resting her head on her knees… and waited. This plan was out of her comfort zone—hell, she’d made it clear that she didn’t want this. Yet she wanted to take the chance. “Jake, you’re not the only one who can go big,” she said into the air with a giggle, thinking about his response.