Chapter 27 #2
“Your father happened. He ignored my desires and dropped by to see me at school, finding Carter in my apartment. Things did not go well.” She shook her head, looking away.
“As much as I adored Carter, I realized at that moment just how much in love with your father I truly was. It came down to being forced to make a choice. When I did, Carter blamed your father for interfering. Your father thought Carter had used me. For a little while, it was a mess.”
“All this time he made Carter’s children suffer, Axe the most.”
“Because your father cared so much about you, the apple of that man’s eye.”
Just like what Jose had said. Sighing, I heard the grandfather’s clock ticking, the constant noise something I’d hated as a child. Now it was a strange, silly reminder that time moved on.
Or at least it should.
“I’m in love with Axe Beckett, Mother. I don’t care what Father says. I’m through with suffering because of your pasts. If he doesn’t like my relationship, then he’s the one who’ll never see me again.”
Instead of concern, she clapped her hands together.
“That’s what I was hoping to hear. You deserve to live your life the way you want to live it.
Axe is an amazing young man. I’ve watched him grow up, sharing his hopes and dreams. His friendship with Wade was…
I was overjoyed. And your father will come around. Trust me.”
“Well, I can guarantee you that friendship has ended and do you know why? A love triangle that didn’t exist. How’s that for karma?”
“Time has a way of healing things, especially when something is as important as a relationship. Just remember that.”
As I stood, I realized she was right. “Thank you for sharing with me.”
“Past time, I think. I’ll be in the stands of the rodeo. You can share that with that man of yours.”
Of mine. I wasn’t entirely certain about that. “Ugh. Don’t remind me. There’s a lot of work to do.”
She stood, her expression one I wasn’t certain of, but when she grabbed and squeezed my hand, I was reminded of the day I’d run home crying after being forced to accept the boy of my dreams didn’t want me. “With Axe by your side, the event will be a major success. I’m very proud of you.”
“For what, Mama?”
“For following your heart.”
My heart. I’d ignored aspects of my heart for years, promising myself I’d never care enough about anyone to let them in.
And in a few short days, a grumpy smokejumper ignoring his own heart had forced me to open mine.
The irony given our two families was something I’d not soon forget.
“One last piece of advice, darling girl. Don’t wait to tell him how you really feel. Over eight years have gone by. While I’m a firm believer everything happens for a reason, I’m also old enough to grasp the reality that life is too short. If you love Axe with all your heart, tell him.”
“What if he doesn’t feel the same way?”
“Well, I find that difficult to believe, but let’s say he’s incapable of embracing the truth felt in his heart, at least you can look back and say you tried without regret or remorse. Besides, I raised a warrior and warriors go after what they want.”
“Mothers are always right.”
“Don’t you forget that.”
A warrior. As I headed out, I knew my mother was right.
The old truck rattled as I headed to the barn. How many times had I sought solace at the large space as a child? So many times I couldn’t remember. After every fight with my father, every snub from a boy, and every time I’d felt lonely, which was often, it had been my hiding place.
For some reason on this beautiful, star-filled night, I needed a little time to myself.
Once inside, I headed to the mare’s stall, filling her food trough.
As I leaned over the open gate, my thoughts drifted from her to Axe. It was interesting how he was never far from my mind.
“What do you think, little beauty? I need to think of a name. You look like my girl, Sasha. When I was seventeen, she grew sick and died. Losing her nearly broke my heart.”
The mare lifted her head, still chomping on some food. I’d learned a long time ago just how sensitive animals could be. She instantly sensed I was in a bad place in my mind and walked closer, hanging her head over the gate.
Her whinny brought a smile. “Wait. Are you suggesting I call you Sasha?” Her nudge was exactly what I needed.
I stroked her muzzle, closing my eyes. “Then Sasha it is. Tomorrow, we go for a ride.” Jose knew me so well, realizing how much having a horse here in my own private sanctuary would brighten my mood.
Perhaps in a way, my father had known as well. I’d yet to thank him.
The brief moment of peace was interrupted by my phone ringing. Hopeful it was Axe, I eagerly yanked it into my hand, frowning immediately.
“What do you want, Wade?” I stroked Sasha’s nose again before pulling away, closing the gate.
“I want to talk to you about what happened.”
“There’s nothing to talk about. You can work it out with Axe or not. At this point, I don’t care any longer, but just stay out of my way.”
“Please, I just want to talk to you.”
“No. Now, I’m going to go enjoy a nice glass of wine and pretend I was born into a different family.” After I ended the call, Sasha snorted at the appropriate time. “That’s my girl.”
After turning off the lights, I headed up the stairs, thinking about Axe all over again. He certainly had a way of making himself known.
Tossing my purse and briefcase, I walked toward the little kitchen area, the old boom box capturing my attention. I couldn’t believe it was still around. Maybe it still worked. I was shocked to find an old CD of mine inside. An eighties dance CD. Who in the world had brought it out here?
Well, the music would keep me company, maybe even helping me to relax. When it blared through the speakers, I did a little spin before heading toward the already opened bottle of wine. Every few seconds, thoughts of Axe rolled into my mind.
We’d danced around this thing we had going on. As soon as I saw him again, I would risk my heart once again.
But if this time he didn’t want the woman standing in front of him, I’d punch him in the jaw. Laughing felt good. With the wine in hand, I sat down and propped my feet on the small table, even closing my eyes as I hummed to the music.
The ring of my phone brought the same emotion, a need to talk to Axe. Life was too short. Seeing a Dallas number, I sat straight up. “McKenzie Sterling.”
“Ms. Sterling, this is Marshall Adams, the Dallas County fire inspector. I understand you’re working on a criminal case in Montana that might have a correlation to one here in Dallas.”
So I’d told a little white lie. “Yes, sir. I am. Is there anything you can tell me?”
“I can confirm the fire was arson and an accelerant was used.”
“A particular type?” If I found out it was an unusual compound, then perhaps that would help identify the arsonist. I also needed to know if it was the same one as found in the fires in Missoula.
“Linseed oil and from what I can tell, a massive concentration.”
“Linseed oil. You’re certain?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
The product was commonly used on ranches for saddles and other leather products. A cold shiver skated down my spine. “Is there anything else you can share?”
“Just that whoever set the fire knew what he or she was doing. The fire burned very hot.”
“Thank you, Inspector Adams, I appreciate the call.”
“Yes, ma’am.” As I placed the phone on the coffee table, I thought about what this could mean. There were dozens of ranches in Missoula. Including my father’s.
That didn’t necessarily mean anything.
Then why were my hands shaking?
Was it possible my father had figured arson was the only way out? No. Then he wouldn’t ask me to help him.
Unless he wanted to pull the attention away from himself.
This was crazy. My dad was many things, but he’d never do something so terrible. Would he?
“Stop. Just stop.” I jumped to my feet, trying to take deep breaths while pacing the floor.
As I thought through what pieces of the puzzle were most disconcerting, a strange sound caught my attention. I turned my head toward the edge of the loft, straining to listen. When I didn’t hear anything, I moved to the music, turning it down.
I was just jittery.
With the music back to the regular volume, I headed toward my laptop.
Bang.
What in the hell was that? It sounded like something falling.
I didn’t waste any time turning down the music, instead placing the wine on the table then heading downstairs. What in the hell was that smell?
Something nutty. Something… burned.
Sasha whinnied from her stall. My nerves on edge, I rushed toward her.
Only to notice smoke.