Chapter 4 #2
“What?” she asked.
“Thinking too loudly,” he said.
“Maybe stop noticing things, and my thinking won’t bother you,” she insisted.
“No,” he breathed. That single word rolled through her like warm whiskey. She hated how much she liked it.
The silence stretched again before Jonnas spoke quietly. “Do you have food at your apartment?”
The question caught her off guard. “Um, kind of,” she lied.
His eyes narrowed slightly. “That’s not an answer.”
“I have ramen,” she said proudly, but Jonnas looked horrified.
“I’m serious,” he growled.
“I can tell. Which part of my answer is upsetting you?” she asked. She rolled her eyes when he didn’t answer. “I’ve been busy.”
“You’re growing a human,” he reminded.
“That human currently likes ramen,” she defended. That was another lie. The human growing inside of her didn’t seem to like any food—including ramen.
“That human is not making nutritional decisions for itself yet—you are,” he said.
Dani bit back another smile. This shouldn’t feel domestic, and it definitely shouldn’t feel intimate, and yet every little thing about this conversation made something warm unfurl in her chest. No one had ever fussed over her before—not like this.
Not with this strange mix of control and care.
“You don’t have to do this,” she said quietly.
Jonnas glanced at her again. “Do what?”
“Act like—” She struggled for the words.
“Like this matters to you already.” His jaw flexed as he pulled into the parking lot outside her apartment complex.
Dani immediately wanted to crawl under the seat and die.
Her apartment building wasn’t terrible exactly, but it definitely wasn’t nice either.
The brick exterior needed work, and one of the balcony railings looked crooked.
Mrs. Green from apartment 2B was smoking on the front steps, wearing a leopard-print robe and fuzzy slippers.
Jonnas took one look at the building and frowned. Mortification flooded her. “Don’t,” she snapped immediately.
“Don’t what?” he asked.
“Don’t judge me,” she spat.
His expression shifted instantly. “Dani—”
“I know where I live,” she said defensively. “I know it’s not fancy, and I know my car sucks, and I know you probably think this place is—”
“Stop.” The sharpness in his tone silenced her instantly. Jonnas turned fully toward her now, his gaze steady.
“I am not judging you,” he breathed. She looked away anyway, because people always judged her—always.
“You know what I see?” he asked quietly.
She shrugged. “I see a woman who’s been taking care of herself with no help.
” His voice softened slightly. “I see someone working her ass off.” Emotion clogged her throat unexpectedly because no one had ever looked at her like that before.
Not like she was strong, instead of struggling.
“I’m not helpless,” she whispered.
“I know,” he said.
“Then stop treating me like I might break,” she insisted. Something dangerous flickered in his eyes then.
“You think taking care of you means I think you’re weak?” he asked. Dani’s breath caught.
Jonnas leaned slightly closer, his voice lower now. “There’s a difference between helpless and cared for, baby girl.” There was that name again. Every time he said it, something inside her melted.
“You really need to stop calling me that,” she whispered weakly.
“No,” he whispered. Her thighs pressed together instantly. Jonnas seemed to notice the effect he had over her again, which was instantly humiliating. The temperature inside the SUV shifted immediately.
“You like it when I call you that,” he said softly. It wasn’t a question. Dani stared at him in horror.
“You’re not supposed to say that out loud,” she insisted.
His mouth curved slightly. “Why not?”
“Because it’s embarrassing,” she admitted.
“Why?” he asked.
She looked away from him. “Because normal people don’t react to things like that.” The second the words left her mouth, she regretted them. Jonnas went very still and then was dangerously calm.
“Who told you that?” he asked.
Her stomach twisted. “No one.”
“Bullshit,” he challenged. Dani swallowed hard. She hated this part because she hated talking about this. Telling another person what she liked and needed wasn’t easy and usually ended up badly for her.
“You wouldn’t understand,” she insisted.
“Try me,” he said.
She laughed nervously. “You really want to have this conversation in a parking lot?”
“If that’s where you need to have it,” he said.
That answer hit her harder than it should have.
Jonnas watched her carefully before speaking again.
“You think wanting someone to take care of you makes you abnormal?” he asked.
Tears burned unexpectedly behind her eyes because when he said it like that, it sounded so simple, so harmless.
But every past experience she’d had told her otherwise.
“You don’t get it,” she whispered. “People hear things like that and think there’s something wrong with me.”
His expression hardened instantly. “Well, those people are idiots.”
Dani blinked at him. “What?”
“You heard me,” he growled. Warmth flooded her chest so fast it almost hurt. Jonnas reached over slowly, giving her time to pull away before brushing his knuckles lightly against her cheek.
“There is nothing wrong with wanting comfort,” he said quietly.
“There is nothing wrong with wanting someone you trust to take care of you.” His words wrapped around her heart painfully, because that was the problem—she was starting to trust him.
It was all happening way too fast, and that terrified her almost as much as how badly she wanted him.