23. Stephanie
STEPHANIE
Staying at work after hours had become the norm for Stephanie over the last several days.
The idea of going home was painful, because she knew that once she got there she would be alone with her thoughts.
Here, at least, there was work to distract her, to divert her from the constant revisiting of everything she had lost. Alone in her house, there would be nothing but silence, and Stephanie just couldn’t face it.
For the first few days she’d done this, Kaylie had stuck around.
She was loyal and hardworking, eager to impress.
But yesterday evening, Stephanie had told her to go home.
“You don’t need to be here,” she’d said gently.
“I’m just trying to get some extra work done because I’m expecting to be busy in the coming weeks. But you should go home.”
After a little persuading, Kaylie had been convinced. Stephanie half wished her assistant was still around—it helped to have someone to talk to, just to fill the silences. But it wasn’t fair to keep Kaylie here just because she couldn’t face being on her own.
She really did need to get this work done. The morning sickness episodes were still happening, and she anticipated having trouble coming into work as the weeks progressed. It would be better if she was on top of things. That way, when things began to slide later, she wouldn’t fall as far behind.
At least, that was the hope.
The marketing firm she was in talks with had sent over a portfolio of the ad content they wanted to run.
Stephanie opened the folder and skimmed through the contents.
She would read it in depth later—right now she was having a little bit of trouble focusing on the text.
The doctor had told her brain fog might be one of the symptoms of early pregnancy, but he had really undersold it.
This was a bigger problem than the morning sickness was, at least at the moment.
She couldn’t focus on the writing, but at least she could look at the pictures.
She’d made it clear to the firm that she wanted men and women represented equally in her advertising so people would understand that her products weren’t gendered.
The top image was of a man with bright blue eyes and messy hair that reminded her painfully of Elijah’s.
I wonder if the baby is going to look like him. If every time I look at my child, all I’ll see is Elijah, and I’ll never be able to forget about the fact that I fumbled the best thing I ever had.
There was a knock on her office door and she looked up, expecting to see that Kaylie had come back.
But it wasn’t Kaylie.
Elijah stood there, as if summoned by her thoughts.
For a moment, she could only stare at him. She couldn’t even breathe—it was as if one wrong move might make him disappear, and she was afraid to move at all.
“I went to your house,” he said quietly. “But you weren’t there. And then your neighbor came out and told me that you had been working late recently, so I thought I might find you here.”
“How did you know where my office is?” she managed. “You’ve—you’ve never been here.”
He held up his phone, and she saw the SilkSoft website. “It’s on your About Us page.”
He was right. “I’d forgotten about that,” she whispered.
“I’m sorry if I shouldn’t be in here, but the front door wasn’t locked, and… well, I wanted to see you. I think we need to talk about everything. If you’re willing, I mean.”
She stepped back. It was definitely awkward, completely unexpected, and yet there was no chance she was going to send him away.
Not after these last few days of wondering whether she was ever going to see him again.
No matter what he said now, it would be better than the complete silence she had been dealing with.
He came into the office, and Stephanie was suddenly hyperaware of how little space there was. She gestured to the chair she kept for guests.
But Elijah shook his head and remained on his feet. “Stephanie,” he said. His voice was hoarse. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. About the baby.”
A shiver passed through her. “I don’t know what to say, Elijah. What I did… I understand why you’re angry. I can try to explain, but…”
“Stop.” He held up his hand. “That’s not where I want to start today.”
“Okay,” she whispered. They could start anywhere he liked. She knew her role today was to be as accommodating as she could. I’m lucky he came back to talk to me at all.
And no matter how she felt about anything he had to say, she knew that she would have to accept his words.
She owed it to her child. It was her behavior that had gotten the two of them into this mess, and anything she could do to bring her baby’s father back, she would.
Even if Elijah wasn’t willing to be a part of her life, he had to at least consider being there for the baby. Surely he would.
He swallowed and looked down.
Stephanie’s heart hammered.
When he looked up again, his blue eyes fixed on hers.
“I made a terrible mistake,” he said.
She was sure she must be misunderstanding him. “What are you talking about?”
“Walking out on you the way I did,” he said. “There’s no excuse. I can’t begin to apologize enough for that.”
“No…” she frowned. “You did it because… because of me. Because you were angry at me.” She drew a breath and spoke quickly.
“And it makes sense that you were. After what you found out about… well, about everything… I always knew you would be angry if you learned what had happened. If you knew that I had agreed to go out with you because of my agreement with your father. But I just hope you know, that ended a long time ago. It was a terrible mistake, one I should never have made… but almost everything we had was real. I knew early on that I had true feelings for you, and the moment I realized it, I contacted your father and told him I couldn’t go on doing what he wanted me to do.
I knew that it would be dishonest to go on seeing you, to have real feelings for you, and to take his money at the same time.
I never took a penny from him, and I’m so sorry that I let myself believe even for a moment that it would be acceptable to do that. ”
“Please stop.” He stepped forward. His hand came to rest on her shoulder.
Stephanie closed her eyes and relished his touch. She hadn’t thought she would ever feel it again, and so much was communicated there. His hand rested lightly on her, warm and reassuring. Soothing. This wasn’t anger. It couldn’t be.
“I didn’t come here to make you apologize to me,” he murmured.
“I spoke with my father, and he told me everything. He told me the whole thing was his idea. And he told me the same thing you’re telling me—that you called it off weeks ago.
” His gaze searched hers. “You called it off before you were pregnant.”
“God, yes,” she breathed. “Whatever you think of me, Elijah, please don’t think that this pregnancy had anything to do with all that.
This baby came from love. I loved you. I do love you, truly.
I wouldn’t have gotten close to you if not for your father’s involvement, but if my feelings hadn’t been real, this baby would never have been conceived, I promise you that. ”
He nodded. “I know,” he said. “And I understand why you made the choices you did. I’m not angry.”
“Really?” That seemed too good to be true.
“How could you not be? I know what your father has put you through. I knew all along that if you ever found out, you would feel like I was siding with him against you, and I knew how awful that would be for you. I should have told you, but… well, I was afraid. I was afraid I’d lose you.
” Her eyes filled with tears and she turned her face away, ashamed to let him see.
He cupped her cheek and turned her back to him.
“You aren’t going to lose me,” he murmured.
“Stephanie, all I want is you. All I want is our baby. I meant what I told you the day we learned you were pregnant. This is wonderful news. I’m overjoyed.
Truly, I still am. I was shocked that day, but I’m ashamed of how I handled myself.
I know you, and I trust you, and I should have stayed to talk to you about it instead of believing the worst and running off.
I promise you, if you take me back, I will never do anything like that again.
I will always stay, even when things seem too hard to bear.
You’ll never be left alone in anything. Not like that. ”
She shook her head, laughing through her tears. “If I take you back?” she repeated. “Have you forgotten so soon that I’m the one who broke your trust?”
“Stephanie, when you made your agreement with my father, I was a stranger to you,” Elijah said.
He took her hand, and she stared, unable to believe that this was happening.
“You didn’t break my trust,” he went on.
“You couldn’t, because you and I didn’t have trust with one another then.
We have trust now. And I’m standing here with you now, and I’m telling you that I trust that you would never do anything to hurt me. That you would never lie to me.”
“I wouldn’t,” she agreed, tears spilling down her cheeks.
“I know who you are.” He reached up and brushed away a tear with his thumb.
“Whatever came before, we can forget it. Maybe you were opportunistically trying to advance your company. Maybe I was a wild playboy who ended up in the tabloids far too often. But all that was before we knew each other. Before we trusted each other. Before we loved each other.”
He traced her cheekbone, her jawline, with his fingertips, and she exhaled shakily.
“All I want now is to be with you,” he said. “All I want is to make you happy, and to build this family together. Can we put the past behind us and start fresh?”
“I can’t think of anything I’d like more,” Stephanie said softly.
He wrapped his arms around her, pulled her close, and kissed her, and as their lips met, a joy like nothing Stephanie had ever felt in her life exploded within her.
She was getting her second chance—and so was he.
And she knew from the bottom of her heart that they would guard the trust—and the love—they had built between them for the rest of their days.