47. Maia
47
MAIA
T he sun is high in the sky, flowers starting to bloom, as the final month of spring comes to a start. The outside of my bedroom window shows a beautiful and serene day. I hope that the calm vibes continue.
“We’re on our way over now,” Alex says, the phone crackling slightly on his end since he’s calling me on the car speaker as they drive over here from home. “We’ll probably only be fifteen minutes or so. Are you sure you still want to go out for lunch? We can just head home if you’d rather and make something so you and Phoebe can get settled.”
I nod before verbalising it so he can hear that I do still want to go out. I’ve missed them so much, even if it was just one night.
We went to the second pack meeting yesterday after I bonded with Seb, and the guys dropped me off at my place so they could “sort themselves out”. There were some very heated goodbyes, and honestly, anyone watching would assume I was sending them off to war.
We were a tad dramatic.
I half-expected at least one of them to crawl into bed with me at some point through last night and put an end to my miserable tossing and turning. When the morning light came and nobody was here, I was pretty disappointed that they didn’t.
But I did wake up to numerous texts from each of them—Seb the most, followed by an eager Ben—and promises for a nice lunch before we tackle the rest of their family drama.
The bonds have been stable, their feelings ranging from amusement to brief annoyances, but mostly they’ve just been content. Since they’ve got in the car to come and get Phoebe and I, though, they’ve felt determined and full of joy.
It might be a bit over the top, but I feel the exact same way.
Despite my soul feeling so empty, I’m very glad that they seem to be on the same page. All the messages have been confident, and even when chatting to them, they’ve been calm and prideful.
So I’m glad to know that they’ve figured the plan out. It’s great, and it means that now they’ve come up with the plan, we can go ahead and enact it.
I’ve got faith that whatever is going to happen regarding Emily— Morgan— is something that they can handle properly, but it also means that we can get on the same page for dealing with the Grey family as a whole.
The custody battle is soon approaching, and we need to figure that out, too. Getting it laid out, prioritising, and?—
“Enough,” I hear from who I think is Seb. “Stop.”
“Stop what?” Ben, I think, asks.
“Worrying.” Topher leans in closer to the speaker. “We’ve got a plan, princess, and we’ll go over it. But, first, we’re going to have dinner and pretend that your mates don’t come from a very fucked up family.”
“We’re not fucked up, though.” Ben laughs. “Actually, maybe some of us are.”
“Which ones?” I ask, letting their teasing ground me.
“Seb.” Three men say it at once, and I giggle. We chat for another few minutes, their jokes and calmness helping soothe me.
“I’m good now.” My words are timid, but they can feel the confidence in my chest.
“Are you sure, princess? We can stay on the line until we’re there.”
“No, I’m okay, honest. I’ll get Phoebe sorted and meet you outside the front.”
“Okay, little butterfly. We’ll see you soon,” Alex says. “Love you.”
The phone goes dead, and I grin down at my happy little baby. She’s been full of smiles all morning, even during her second bath of the day. “What do you say, my love? Shall we go and see our daddies?”
She doesn’t react, even when I wish she would, and I sigh as I head through to start locking up the house. After the whole pie incident, I thought I’d feel weird being here, even though I knew it was Julie, but I didn’t.
Realising that the unknown I was so afraid of was just my murderous mother-in-law really made it so much easier for me to be here.
Everything has been the exact same each time I’ve visited, and it was no different yesterday. The only true panic was about being alone when I’m so used to having my men there.
I lock the back door, double check the windows in the kitchen are locked properly, and then start getting Phoebe into her car seat. She’s very content and doesn’t whine as I do the fastenings up.
I’ve got no idea where the guys are going to take us for lunch, but she’s due a nap—as always—so hopefully, she’ll sleep throughout the meal so I can eat. My guys have been even more amazing than usual since my dinner with Topher as we each rotate through who entertains her during meals.
I take the brunt of it, since I’ve got the boobs, but she’s often very entertained by her daddies .
Every day, it becomes more and more normal for the guys to just step in and do what she needs or what I need. They’re acting like my partners, like her daddies, and I know that’s because I’ve been allowing it.
The early days were hard. The first month was even harder because, whilst we made progress, I still kept them at a distance.
But this last month… it’s been perfect, even with the outward problems. Sure, we’ve had our moments where we’ve bickered, and we’ve got multiple big weights hanging over our heads… but our life can be so good.
There’s not even a single whine as I tighten her straps, and I grin down at my daughter. “You’re such a good girl. Your daddies should be here soon, and we’ll go get mummy some food.”
She gurgles, and I grin, before lifting her up from the floor. I carry her out, along with the bag, stumbling ever so slightly. The guys should be here in a few minutes, and it’s a nice enough day that we can wait. I lock the front door, bending down to put the keys in the bag, and freeze. There’s a shift, so subtle I don’t know what alerts me to it, but I just feel it.
The hair on the back of my neck rises up, and there’s a warning feeling in my chest.
“Hi, Maia.” A familiar voice accounts for my panic, and my stomach seems to fill with lead.
“Why are you here?” I whisper. I can feel the palpations, my legs tremble with the way I’m half balancing, and I quickly rise to my full height before spinning around to face him. My height is nothing compared to his size, but it makes me feel better to be at a smaller advantage. I take a few steps forward, hoping to keep his attention on me and not Phoebe.
The guys are on their way.
It’ll be okay.
I just need to stall .
I hope they can feel my panic and get here faster but without risking themselves.
He’s standing at the edge of my street, a good three or four metres away, with a pair of shorts on that are a washed out black. His blond hair is windswept, and there’s a few specs of mud across his white T-shirt. There’s no difference in this man than there is in Ryan.
It’s how he fooled me for so long.
How he took advantage of me.
But just because Ethan thinks he’s entitled to see me, it doesn’t make it true.
“You told me that you’d come if I needed you,” I say, ignoring his look of confusion. My tone doesn’t waver, I’m confident and firm. “I never called for you, Ethan.”
“Where did you hear that name?” he asks, and I roll my eyes.
“You tried that bullshit last time,” I say, crossing my arms in front of my chest, hoping the confidence is what wins out, and not the panic, in my scent.
I do not want him thinking he’s got the upper hand.
Even so, it’s very obvious that he does.
“Last time?” His eyes narrow.
“Don’t do this, Ethan. Why are you here?”
“I came to see you.” His voice is gentle, so much like Ryan’s. It makes my stomach turn, the acidity burning my throat. “And to see Phoebe.”
“Don’t look at her,” I snarl, anger filling me as his eyes snap back up to me. I’m not playing these sick games with him any longer. “ Do. Not. Look. At. Her.”
“Maia, what—” He has the audacity to look shocked, as if I’m the one who is being unreasonable here.
“Phoebe is mine.” She gives a soft whine but doesn’t start to cry, so I don’t turn to look at her. I can’t let him out of my sight. I’m already at a huge disadvantage. “Mine and Ryan’s. We made her. Not you. Not your horrible family. None of you have a claim to her, Ethan. So just leave us alone. Please.”
Anger fills his face, the fury so powerful that my heart stops just for a second. I can feel my nerves coming alight, my whole body preparing for a fight. I bury the fear deep, knowing that Phoebe only has me to protect her right now.
Ethan might not be a bad guy, you know, a tiny little possibility that there’s some goodness inside him even after the way he betrayed his brother.
But he lives at home, with his parents, who are not good people, and my daughter will never be around them, no matter how badly they’re trying to steal her from me.
“You want me to leave you alone? You’d deny me seeing her?” There’s a broken note to his voice, and I can feel myself softening.
Stop it, Maia. This is not Ryan.
This is Ethan . The coward who has tormented me. The man who is working to take my daughter from me. The man who wears the face of my first love but is a rotten soul.
“She’s not yours!” I hiss, and I hate the flash of pain across his face.
“She’s family.”
“Yes. My family. She’s not going to be around the toxic people that Ryan escaped from. She has nothing to do with you.”
He scoffs, glaring at me. “You know nothing about Ryan’s life.”
“I’m glad you’ve given up the pretence of being him. Are you going to keep up the pretence of not being Ethan, too?” I whisper, shaking my head as his eyes flash. “Why would you do this, Ethan? Why would you punish me this way? Why can’t you just—” I choke out a sob and take a breath to try and calm myself. “Why can’t you just leave me alone?”
“Punish you?” His eyes narrow, and he takes a small step forward. “This was never about punishing you, Maia. Not in the beginning, anyway.”
“And now?” I glare at him, trying to gather the confidence I held, rather than sobbing.
“He loved you. My brother truly fucking loved you.” There’s a sneer on his face, one I’ve never seen on Ryan. The bitterness that laces his tone is so strong it breaks my heart to hear it.
Not Ryan. This man is not the one you love, Maia.
“I love him.” I cross my arms in front of my chest, a soft smile filling my face as I think of Ryan. “No matter that he’s gone, I still love him.”
“You’re a liar!” Ethan roars, his voice echoing through the near silent streets. “You’re moving on, Maia. You’re leaving him and his memory behind, believing whatever shit they tell you. You’re letting my brother’s memory be tainted by their poison.”
I try not to let his words hurt me. I try to pretend he isn’t wearing Ryan’s face as he hurls these hateful words at me.
But I fail.
Because his words are accurate. I am moving on. I am leaving the ghost of my fiancé in the past, and I’ve bonded with my future. I won’t ever forget him, and I’ll spend the rest of my life aching with where he’s gone… but I also won’t wallow in my grief.
Not just because I have four men here determined to make me happy but because Phoebe shouldn’t have to live a life where her mother knows nothing but sadness and grief.
Her biological dad died. He was murdered and taken far before his prime. But fate always has a way, and Ryan and I weren’t endgame, no matter what we believed.
And I can’t understand why Ethan can’t grasp that, either.
I stare at the man in front of me with venom in my eyes. “How am I the villain just because I moved on?”
I purse my lips as I feel his anger pouring at me, and my lips quiver.
“Because he loved you,” his brother spits at me, the venom strong enough to burn. “Because you’re living with his enemies. With the people who cost us him.”
Him.
Not her?
Not her.
“Ryan is dead, and I owe him nothing. ” Don’t I deserve to be happy? I glare at the carbon copy, letting my anger take force. “I loved him, Ethan. I still love him. I won’t let anyone—not you, not your family, and certainly not my mates—try to twist me against him. I know exactly the man he was. But I also deserve to live . He’d never, ever have expected me to spend the rest of my life in mourning.
“We have a daughter together, and I know the kind of man Ryan was. He’d want me to give her stability, and happiness, and show her the good things that exist in this world. He couldn’t tell me about the werewolf world, not whilst he was trying his best to live without it.
“But now that I do know, I know he’d want me to protect her from your family. He’d want me to protect her future and keep her safe from the toxic people in your world thinking her only worth comes from being a female-born wolf. I know who Ryan was, do you?”
He looks like I’ve struck him, his eyes wide, his lips parted. “Maia?—”
“And yet, you’re over here, playing the games you have been, showing up here pretending to be him, messing with my house, and stealing my things?—”
Ethan freezes, his skin looking abnormally pale. “What?”
“Acting like it hasn’t been you sneaking around doesn’t change the truth,” I hiss, stepping away from him. Phoebe’s silent, and I’m scared to turn around and check on her because it gives him another advantage, so for now, I’ll keep him in my sight. “You are a vile, horrible man who needs to find a better hobby than harassing a widow.”
“Maia, I’ve never?— ”
“Save the lies!” I shriek, the sound stinging my throat with how screechy it was. He shakes his head and gives me Ryan’s soft smile.
“I’d never fuck you around like that, sweetheart,” he says quietly. “Ryan would’ve had my ass for it.”
“Yeah, well, Ryan is dead .” My head is pounding, and I shake my head as tears fill my eyes. “So I suppose now you can taunt his widow, steal his child, and just pretend to be the man you think he was. But Ethan? You’re never going to match up. Ryan was kind, and smart, but he was also a man who didn’t hide in somebody else’s shadow.
“He wouldn’t sit back and be your parent’s puppet. He’s the type of man to know the world isn’t perfect, but rather than accept it for what it is, he works actively to change it. I wouldn’t have accepted anything else.
“Much like your enemies . The men who have bonded with my soul, warm my beds, and helped me raise your niece are more like him than you ever could be, even with sharing his face. Ryan was pure, and now that I know about this world, I completely understand why he wanted to leave it.
“So, please, just fuck off, and leave me and my child alone.”
I break down into sobs just as the car pulls up, and my mates arrive. Phoebe’s in the car seat at the doorway, and I don’t know which one of them stays inside the car, but I do know it wasn’t Seb based on the way he charges over to me.
He sneers at his cousin but dutifully wraps me up in his arms as another one of them darts behind to grab the car seat.
“You’re wrong, Maia,” Ethan says, his words carrying through the air. “I’m not and never will be my parent’s puppet.”
“No, you wouldn’t be,” Topher says, closing the car door as he strides over to where we’re standing. There’s a blank expression on his face, but anger is simmering away inside of him. “Because we fucked up here, princess, and I’ve led you to believe something that wasn’t actually true.”
“I don’t understand,” I whisper, clutching onto Seb as the tears continue to drip down my face. Seb’s angry like Topher, but not because of Ethan. He’s angry because I’m so distraught.
“This isn’t Ethan, little love,” Seb says quietly. He rubs circles into my lower back.
My teeth start to chatter, and my legs nearly give way. Seb’s grip is the only thing keeping me up. “Ryan… Ryan is dead.” I can’t look away from the blond man. “He’s dead.”
“Yes, he is,” Ethan— or… not Ethan— says. His tone is sad, empty, even.
“But Oliver is not,” Topher says quietly.
“I don’t—” I start before, as always, my eyes roll in the back of my head.
I didn’t want to be awake for this reveal, anyway.