24. ashton
twenty-four
ashton
. . .
Somethin’ Simple - Ella Langley
Reston
Hey Ash, it’s me
Reston
*attachment: 1 image*
I was wondering if I could ask a favor?
hit me
Almost immediately after I send my text, my phone rings with an incoming video call.
I accept it and see a familiar face—Reston’s face, against the same background as the selfie he just sent—a little pixelated and jumpy on the screen.
After a few seconds, he smooths out. His hair is a little longer, a little shaggier than the last time I saw him, and he’s rocking a full five o’ clock shadow rather than the mustache and clean cheeks Jody tends to prefer, but otherwise, he’s the spitting image of his big brother.
Right down to that panty-melting grin. Even though they’re seven years apart in age, there’s absolutely no mistaking Jody and Reston Fisher for brothers.
It looks like Reston is sat on the floor, with a guitar propped on either side of him. He leans forward to rest his phone somewhere in front of him as he waves shyly with his free hand.
“Lookin’ good, Res. What can I do for you?”
“I need a favor.”
“Got that.” I smirk. “What is it?”
“I need to send you Jody’s birthday present. I can’t send it to Mom, ‘cause even though Jody has his own house, he basically still lives there. He’d find it in a heartbeat. And I can’t send it to Everett or Brooks, because my brother has no fucking boundaries and he’ll snoop.”
“So you thought of me? What in the world makes you think Jody Fisher wouldn’t just let himself into my house and poke around the way he does my brother’s?” I tuck the keys to Dad’s truck behind the sun visor and hop out, leaving the doors unlocked as I make my way toward the stable block.
Reston pauses, contemplation coloring his features. His hands hover over the neck of the guitar he’s pulled into his lap.
“He respects you enough at least that he won’t go snooping in your underwear drawer.”
He’s got a point, I guess. Barely, but a point is a point. If Jody thought there was something to find, I wouldn’t put it past him to go snooping through my bras and pants.
“So what you’re sending is small enough to fit in my underwear drawer? You want me to hide your brother’s gift with my panties?”
“Ashton?” Reston stares directly into the lens on his phone.
I hold my phone further away from me, uncomfortable with his burning gaze.
Reston and I have always been the babies of our extended ranch family, and whilst he preferred staying indoors, playing music, and writing songs to hanging out and creating chaos on the ranch with the rest of us, we still managed to forge a unique kind of youngest-kids bond.
“Stop making this weird please. I don’t want to be thinking about your panties. ”
I smirk. “Okay. Send it to me. But don’t make it obvious, ‘kay. You know as well as I do there are eyes and ears all over this ranch. If anyone sees it at the mailbox and suspects anything, it’ll get back to your brother faster’n you fell off that bull.”
“I held on for three whole seconds.”
“And it’ll get back to Jody in two.” I smirk again, and then as my curiosity gets the better of me, I ask, “What is it, anyway?”
“It’s a first-press Jenner Dunn record. Signed. Framed. Limited run. Numbered, too. Only eighty of ‘em printed at first.”
I whistle through my teeth. “Yikes, Res. You must really love your brother or somethin’, huh.”
“Or somethin’,” he says with a self-deprecating laugh.
“I know I’m kinda the black sheep. Never hung out much with y’all.
Left home at eighteen and never looked back.
But y’all always respected my choices. He—all y’all—coulda said stuff, turned your backs like I did when I didn’t want to go into the family business.
But y’all always supported me, and I don’t know if I ever told you how grateful I am, you know? ”
“You didn’t turn your back on anything. You’re family, Res.
” I take off my hat and hang it on the hook in Mayo’s stall.
A little pang of guilt pokes incessantly at me for losing touch with so many people since I left Texas.
Especially for losing touch with Res. He and I have always been the babies.
In spite of how close I’ve always been to our brothers and Brooks, there were so many times I felt as though I was on the outside of whatever in-joke the three of them had.
Reston always understood that feeling. “Family takes care of each other.”
“I know. And this is me taking care of my brother for his birthday.”
“He’s gonna love it.”
“He better. That kinda shit ain’t cheap, even when you got an in.”
“Speaking of an in. How’s Nashville? How’s life with a publishing deal?”
Reston’s face splits into a wide grin. He signed a publishing deal with a record company recently, thanks to some advice and contract help from Ruth.
Last I heard, some major label artists had been cutting his tracks for their records.
I balance my phone on the shelf that holds grooming tools and reach for a brush.
“It’s great. Been writing with some incredible musicians. It feels really good, you know? Like this is what it was all for. The hustle. The sleepless nights, the surviving on ramen and cheap instant coffee. This is where I’m meant to be.”
“Good. I’m happy for you, Res. You look good. You sound good.”
“What about you, huh? Jody said you’re workin’ horses, that mean you’re back in Texas for good?”
I sigh. I run the brush through Mayo’s tail and he snorts softly.
“Still a couple months of kitchen internships left before I get signed off and graduate.”
“So, back to the big city, huh? You gonna stay? I don’t expect many kitchens in Farrow County are big enough for Ashton Tanner.”
“I don’t know, Res.” My words come out in a whisper. Like he senses the ache in my chest, Mayo turns and pushes his head into me gently, and I hold my eyes closed for a long moment.
“You don’t gotta decide anything right now, Ash.” I glance up at Reston’s image on the screen. “You don’t gotta make any decisions. But whatever you choose, I’ll be here for you. We all will. That’s what family does, am I right?”
“Right,” I say with a tear-filled smile.
“Go on, get. I have a date with my best guy, and I hate to break it to ya, but you ain’t got enough legs to fill that spot in my heart.
” I reach for my phone and angle it so Reston has the perfect view of me posing next to Mayo.
Mayo bares his teeth as he grunts out a heavy puff of air. Reston laughs.
“Hey, Mayo. Bye, Mayo. Catch you later, Ash.”
“Hey, text me when you send it.”
“I will. Have fun.” Reston ends the call before I can do it, and I stuff my phone in my pocket before reaching for Mayo’s saddle, hung beside my hat. I get him ready to ride, replace my hat on my head, and lead him out of the stables.
“Good boy,” I murmur. “Stop right here.” I push up onto the concrete block beside the building and swing my other leg over his back, settling into the saddle as I hook my feet into the stirrups.
The comfortable, familiar ache begins to burn in my muscles as Mayo starts to trot.
There really is nothing like having an enormous man between your thighs.
Mayo and I ride out to the ridge. It takes us about forty-five minutes, and there’s a fastening post and a small well out there, where Mayo drinks some water while I sit on the dry grass and stare out across the plains.
It’s a clear day, and from here, I can see nearly all the way to Austin.
This is one of my favorite places on the ranch.
It’s where I come to think. Where I’ve come to cry once or twice.
Where Everett and I have ridden our horses and tried to figure our lives out.
I told Res I didn’t know if I’m back in Texas for good, and the truth is, I don’t know.
I still have unfinished business in New York, with internships to complete, and a loft to move out of before I can officially move back to the ranch.
Move home. But there’s a part of me—a large part, maybe my entire heart—that isn’t sure if that can happen at all.
Because when Everett inevitably finds out about me and Brooks, it’s all over.
Everything about what Brooks and I have been doing is wrong.
We’re lying to people. We’re putting so much at risk—not only our relationships with our best friends and my brother, but our own friendship, too.
I’ve wanted more than friendship from him for my whole life now, but I’ve always been afraid of what could happen to our friendship if we take that step.
The lines have blurred now. He’s still my best friend, Brooks.
He’s still my brother’s best friend. But he’s also the man who rocks my world.
The man who drove me out to a lookout point on a quiet road in the dead of night, just to fuck me beneath the stars on a blanket in the bed of his truck.
The man who brought bottled water and washcloths so I could clean myself up afterward, and who drove home with my hand in his the whole way.
Who kissed me sweetly on my doorstep before leaving in the shadow of night.
The fire is already burning. It’s simply a case of whether we let it light us up or burn us down to the ground.
Just as I’m standing up and dusting dried grass pieces from my shorts, my phone buzzes in my pocket.
Jody
hey pocket rocket my place 2moro to break new horse
“Hey Ashton, are you free tomorrow to help me break a horse?”
There. I fixed it for you.
and don’t call me Pocket Rocket. It’s rude.
Jody
sry ashy. See u 2morro
I’ll be over around 11. Have some of that strawberry lemonade waiting
Jody
youl have to ask mom to make some
YOU’LL have to ask her to make it if you want my help :)
see ya tomorrow, bestie
With a little help from the edge of the well, I climb back up onto Mayo’s back and point him in the direction of home.
Home.
When my brother told me he’d married Ruth—a woman he’d known for only a few months, and spent only a handful of days with over the course of their long-distance relationship—he told me he knew she was the one because she felt like home.
Being with her felt easy, he said. Like she quieted the world’s noise; when he was with her, he felt the kind of contentment you feel when you come home after a long day of honest work.
Coming back to the ranch felt like that.
New York City is loud, always; it’s vibrant and bold and everything I thought I wanted.
At the time, it was what I needed. Now, though, I’m not so sure.
Now, I’m ready to finish my final internships and get signed off.
Graduate from this course and come back to Texas.
Back to the ranch. To my family, my horse. My people. Brooks.
It’s a decision I’ve been putting off making, but it turns out it might have been one of the easiest decisions of my life.