Chapter 20
Chapter Twenty
Roxy
I was rubbing a towel over my hair when the knock at the door came. I rushed over to open it, and Horace gave me his crooked smile. It was kind of unhinged, but I appreciated the effort.
It was then he noticed I was only wearing an oversized T-shirt. “Apologies,” he said, looking scandalized. “I can leave and return with your repast later, my lady.”
“It’s fine. Bring it on in.”
“As you wish. Would you like me to alert your companion?”
The sound of a door closing came from across the hall. “No need,” Lothar said and walked in.
Was he still angry with me? I wasn’t sure I could handle moody Lothar right then, not when my heart already felt as if it’d been pulverized.
Horace unloaded the food from the tray onto the table at the window. “I’ll return to collect the dishes.”
“Thanks, Horace,” I said and shut the door behind him. “Hungry?” I asked Lothar when I felt his gaze burning into me.
“Very.”
I fought back a shiver at the rough edge to his voice, and what he was obviously implying, and took a seat at the table. I popped a piece of cheese in my mouth. “How’s B liking his new accommodations?”
Lothar took his seat opposite me. “Seems like he has a lot to say. Thankfully, I can’t understand any of it.”
I chuckled. “The male always was a blowhard. He once told me that he wrestled and killed a pair of vysan single-handedly. Oh, and he likes to tell everyone that he was the one who got Lucifer’s throne back when Diemos went rogue, and we all know it was the knights.
The lords sat on their hands while we were locked out and did sweet fuck all to help us.
” I shook my head. “The male is delulu, seriously. I don’t know what Lucifer has planned for him, but whatever it is, it’s past due.
” I selected a grape and took a sip of my wine, then glanced across the table when Lothar hadn’t said anything.
He sat back and crossed his arms, and his eyes went from red to gold and back again, doing that weird rapid switch they’d done earlier. It was as if his beast was fighting for freedom, which didn’t make any sense at all. “Are you okay?”
When he said nothing, but also didn’t look away, I rolled my eyes and made a show of selecting a slice of meat that had the perfect meat-to-fat ratio, when inside I was barely holding it together.
The silence dragged on, and I refused to be the one to fill it.
I carried on eating, and he eventually did the same, but still he studied me the whole time.
He wasn’t doing it to intimidate me, that wasn’t what hounds did, especially to females.
It was as if he was searching for something, trying to figure something out, and that terrified the hell out of me.
I tore off a piece of bread, put it in my mouth and forced myself to chew even though it suddenly tasted like sawdust. He wasn’t himself, and he was changing more with every day we’d been on this hunt.
If I didn’t get away from him, and soon, I was afraid it was only a matter of time before Lothar remembered everything.
“You rolled your eyes at me before, why?” he said suddenly, breaking the silence.
I actually jumped, so deep in my own worries. “I know you have limited emotions, Lothar, but even you can’t be that dense.” The feeling of being backed into a corner, of what might happen if I didn’t do something to stop this now, had my reply coming out a lot snappier than I’d intended.
He sat forward, resting his elbows on the table. “I get it, you want me to pretend I’m perfectly fine with you giving me the brush-off, but just so you know, I absolutely am not fine.”
Heat rolled through me in a wave of anger and fear.
I needed him to let this go. “This whole scorned-lover bullshit is getting old, Lothar. We fooled around a couple times, nothing more. You’ve said, more than once, it was only about getting each other off.
Are you saying you want me to ignore my own feelings because of what you want?
Are you saying you want me to force myself to be with you, and if I don’t, you’ll throw a tantrum and give me the silent treatment until I relent? ”
His brows shot up. “That’s not what I said. And do not use the word force when it comes to you and me. I would never fucking do tha—”
“Well, that’s the way you’re acting. I thought, if nothing else, we were friends. Obviously that only applies when you get things your way.”
He growled and reached for my hand resting on the edge of the table.
I pulled it back right as someone knocked on the door.
I shot to my feet, because, honestly, I didn’t trust myself alone with this male, let alone him touching me.
He was my Achilles’ heel, the chink in my armor, my kryptonite, and I was afraid, even with everything I knew, that if he touched me again, if he kissed me, I wouldn’t be able to resist him.
I rushed across the room and yanked the door open. Horace blinked up at me, an odd look on his face.
I scanned him from head to oversized feet. “Is everything okay?”
He jolted a little, then nodded. “I’ve come to clear away your dishes if you’re finished?”
“We’re done, thanks.”
He hustled across the room, loaded up the tray, and headed back across the room, but before he walked out, he turned back, and it looked as though he wanted to say something.
“Horace? Are you sure you’re okay?” I asked him again.
“I want you to know, my lady, that my loyalty to Lucifer has never and will never waver.”
I smiled. “He knows that. That’s why he granted your request to come here. He rewards loyalty.”
The demon bowed his head and backed out, taking the tray with him. I didn’t shut the door after him. Instead, I held it open and turned back to Lothar. “I’d like to get some sleep now.”
“I’d like to continue our conversation,” he said, his jaw stubborn.
“Well, I wouldn’t. Please leave.”
His eyes narrowed as he stared at me from across the room. I stayed where I was, continuing to hold the door wide.
“Roxy—”
“I need you to leave,” I said again, more forcefully.
His nostrils flared, but he stood. He strode toward the door, then stopped in front of me, and I braced when he dipped his head and breathed me deep into his lungs. He growled low. No disgust on his face now, just hunger.
He made another sound, one that was utterly sexual. “We will finish this conversation later, kitten,” he said, then he swaggered out of my room and disappeared into his own.
I woke with a jolt, a rolling boom fading into the distance. Lightning flashed through my room like a strobe light, and I shoved back the covers and rushed to the window. The thunder hit again a moment later, so violent I was positive the tower rocked from the force.
The weather here was always wild and stormy, but something seemed strange, off.
Rushing back across the room, I slid my feet into my boots, opened my door and walked out into the hall.
A loud crash came from somewhere downstairs at the same time another round of lightning lit up the darkness in a riotous show of eerie, glowing blue light flickering against the dark glossy walls.
Lothar’s door opened, and he strode out, feet bare, and hastily pulled on jeans.
“You hear the crash downstairs?” he asked.
“I was just heading down to check it out.”
He nodded and followed me down all seven floors to the foyer. A demon was at the desk and greeted us, and I strode over while Lothar scanned the area and scented the air. “I heard a loud noise down here, what’s going on?”
The demon grinned, flashing his pointed teeth. “Apologies for waking you. The storms here are intense at times, one of our cleaning staff got a fright and dropped something—”
“Something really fucking big,” Lothar said behind me.
The demon nodded. “Well, yes it was, you are correct, but I assure you, all is well.”
“Where’s Horace?” I asked.
“He’s asleep. I’m working the night shift.”
That made sense of course, but then again, Horace was devoted to Lucifer, and I couldn’t imagine him resting, or taking time off with one of Luci’s handmaids here. “I’m just surprised he’d leave his post tonight.”
“I have been training under Horace for many years,” the demon said and bristled. “I assure you I have everything well in hand.”
“Of course, I meant no offense. We’ll head back up now.” I hadn’t been here for a seriously long time. Things changed, but still an unease slid through me.
“Sleep well,” the demon said, his lips curving.
We started back up. “I hate this place,” Lothar said beside me.
“It’s definitely not my favorite. Did anything seem off to you?
” I said and tried not to look at his bare chest, or the trail of dark hair below his belly button that thickened, then disappeared behind his barely hanging-on zipper.
The thing was straining, forced to do all the work without the help of a button, since he’d not bothered to do it up, and it was losing the battle.
“No more than when we got here. This whole fucking place seems off to me. If you’re asking if I sensed anything new while we were down there? No. Nothing.”
I relaxed a little…then his hand brushed mine, and I jumped, my gaze slicing up to his face.
He was looking straight ahead, though. I bit my lip and looked down at my feet.
Don’t look at him. His hand brushed mine again, and my breath literally caught.
I couldn’t even handle the back of his hand touching mine, for fuck’s sake, how could I possibly resist him if he did more than that?
“You smell really good,” he said low.
My throat went dry. “Still no stink, huh?” I forced out.
He shook his head. “That’s gone now. I think for good. This must be how you smell to everyone else.”
We rounded the landing and headed up another flight of stairs, and his hand brushed mine again. I sucked in a breath. He had to be doing it on purpose. I tried to put more distance between us, but the staircase was narrow. “I guess I’ll take that as a win. I’d rather not stink up the place.”
As soon as the last word left my mouth, Lothar spun on me and advanced.
“What are you…” My back hit the wall.
His huge body pressed into mine, his chest pumping hard as he curled his arm around my waist. The other thrust into my hair, and he hauled me off the ground.
“Kitten, you smell like clean cotton and soap, and something else, something I’d never been able to scent on you before, but it’s exactly what I imagined you should smell like.
” He dragged his nose up my throat, breathing deep.
“And blended with all of that, all that is you, is warm, welcoming female, and it is fucking intoxicating.”
I shivered and desperately tried to catch my breath. Welcoming female. In other words, he could smell how much I wanted him, just from the sight of him walking out of his room a short time ago. “Lothar—”
He slammed his mouth down on mine, his knees bending as he curled his big body around me, his arms tightening like he thought I’d try to escape and was attempting to get me closer as he kissed me like a triumphant warrior home from battle.
I should stop him, but I couldn’t do it, despite every reason that I should end this right the hell now. No, I threw my arms around his neck and pulled him closer.
Matching his hunger was impossible, though, I could only surrender.
His fingers cradled the back of my head as his mouth devoured mine, his lips giving fierce, claiming kisses that made my head spin.
In that moment, I lost my way to the power of his need for me, and I ceded to his will.
There was no fighting this—not when his resolve to have me was far stronger than mine was to resist him.
Maybe I could have this? Just one more night.
We’d be going home tomorrow, and once we reached Hell, our time together would be over. I squeezed my eyes closed, praying for mercy, begging the gods to give us this one night without repercussions.
Just give me this one night, then I promise I’ll give him up. I’ll walk way and never come back. I’ll give him up forever.
It was what I had to do. There was nothing else that would guarantee Lothar wouldn’t get hurt. Lucifer said there would be dire consequences if he learned the truth. I had to protect him. That was more important than my feelings.
All I asked for, was tonight.