Chapter 6 - Sadie
The day after the wedding, Rhys takes us to a parents’ group meeting in a park near his house. Even though I’m nervous to go and mingle in the pack, part of me hopes to find a connection with the other moms.
I’ve never really had a good friend, not since college. I lost track of my entire circle when I became a mother, and it wasn’t their fault. I stopped returning their messages after I had Cassie. I just didn’t have time.
I get Cassie dressed and ready to go, noticing with some disappointment that someone has dropped off some very nice clothes for my daughter, but only faded old jeans and shirts for me.
Is this an oversight, or is someone screwing with me?
I try not to let my paranoia get the better of me, but putting on the old clothes feels like a personal insult. I push the feeling away and hold my head high as I take Cassie’s hand and walk out the front door.
“Ready?” Rhys asks, coming out behind us.
“Sure,” I answer, as he locks the door.
I take a moment to look over the house, and I have to admit, it’s one of the nicest places I’ve ever lived. It definitely needs a woman’s touch—the garden is overgrown, the outside needs painting, and the inside is very untidy. But other than that, it’s a nice, spacious, modern house.
I thought we might have to live in that ancient, creepy manor. Thank God we aren’t. I don’t think I could handle it!
We get into the Viper, and Rhys pulls out onto the street. It’s a quiet neighborhood, with only a few houses that are apparently all inhabited by pack members.
“So, is everyone in Silver Valley aware of… your family’s other aspects?” I ask carefully.
Cassie still doesn’t know everything, and I have no fucking clue how to tell her.
“No,” Rhys answers. “The majority of Silver Valley—and Diamond Springs and Kingsville, our sister groups—are normal. We settled here in the early days and just remained part of the existing towns.”
“What does normal mean?” Cassie asks from the back seat.
“It doesn’t exist,” Rhys says matter-of-factly. “It means absolutely nothing. You might say, if you’re talking about someone’s heart rate, for example, it’s within a normal range, but specifics are different for every single person.”
“So, what makes the towns normal?” she asks, her voice high and lilting as her three-year-old brain ponders one of the hardest questions of the human race.
“Well, all of them share certain attributes,” Rhys replies. “My friends and family have those, too, but with extras. Let’s just say, it’s two different kinds of normal, where those other people would say we aren’t.”
“But what makes it normal?” Cassie asks.
I see Rhys frown, an incredibly dark, confused expression. I can’t help but chuckle.
“Never dealt with a three-year-old, huh?”
“No,” Rhys mutters.
“Well, I assure you, this is completely normal.”
Cassie giggles, and I laugh, too.
“So that’s all just nonsense,” Cassie says.
“Pretty much,” I answer, hoping to end the topic there.
So, you know when I said monsters and werewolves and witches weren’t real, Cassie? Well, actually they are, and this is your dad, and he’s an alpha wolf…
I put my face in my hand and try to suppress a groan. I can’t see any of this going well, and the more I think about it, the more questions I have.
Vampires? Dragons? Like, how far does this crazy, magical world go?
I look over at Rhys, wishing I could ask him, but even if we didn’t have Cassie in the back seat, I wouldn’t know where to start.
At least Cassie isn’t upset. That would have broken me in two.
Last night was our second night with Rhys, and Cassie seems to treat the entire situation as a grand adventure.
She likes Rhys’s big house and the huge guest room.
She enjoys the food and the nice, modern bathroom.
Thankfully, Rhys has made absolutely no mention of him and me sharing a room, and if he did, I might lose my shit badly enough for Cassie to notice.
And I can’t let that happen. She’s having a great time for now, and I want to keep it that way.
It only takes a few minutes to get to the park, and a huge tribe of kids is galloping around like an unruly herd of mustangs. Their ages range from Cassie’s right up to thirteen-year-olds, who all appear to be wrangling the younger ones.
Cassie bursts from the back seat, her eyes wide and shining. “Can I go play, Mom?”
“Sure, sweetie,” I say, leaning down to give her a kiss. To my surprise, she doesn’t even notice me, just bolts straight towards the other kids. I watch her go, feeling a little bit abandoned.
This is good. She didn’t get out to play groups much before, because I was too busy and tired. This is a great improvement for her, and I need to get over my shit and let her enjoy it.
Rhys takes my hand. I jump a little, then remember the situation and try to look relaxed as we head up the grassy hill towards the other parents. It’s a small group of men and women. All of them turn to greet us, waving and smiling.
While Rhys introduces me, I’m sure I see disapproving glances shot my way, but I try to brush them off.
I’m imagining it. I’m just nervous.
Rhys immediately gets into a deep conversation with a couple of people, and I catch the vibe that wherever he goes, he’s in demand. Even though the conversation seems frivolous, Rhys gives the others his full attention, listening thoughtfully and replying carefully.
“So, how’s life with the alpha?” one of the girls asks me.
I look over at her and try to assess how to answer the question. “It’s nice, thank you. It’s only been a day, so I don’t really know.”
“Don’t get used to it,” she murmurs with a catty smile.
“What?”
“Oh, nothing,” she says, walking away. “Never mind.”
“Don’t worry about Helen,” one of the others says, shaking my hand. “She’s always rude. I’m Ella, and this is Carly and Eva.”
“Nice to meet you,” I say, shaking hands. Even though everyone shakes my hand, I can feel hostility in the air, and Eva actually wipes her hand on her skirt after touching me.
“I’ve always wondered,” Ella says, “what’s it like to have such dull senses. I mean, you’re practically blind and deaf, right?”
“Excuse me?” I ask in disbelief.
“Well, you can’t see the details on that branch above us, can you?”
“I can see the bark and the leaves, if that’s what you mean.”
“No, no,” Ella snickers. “There’s an ant crawling by the third bud, and a node at the edge of that leaf—you can’t see it?”
“No,” I answer.
All of them giggle and whisper, hiding behind their hands. I try to control myself, but something must have shown on my face.
“Oh, dear, it’s alright!” Ella says, coming over to put an arm around my shoulders and rubbing my arm. “Don’t go getting upset. We’ve never been able to talk to a human like this before, and we’re curious, is all.”
“Uh-huh,” I mutter.
“Don’t worry,” she says, rubbing my arm again. “You’re okay.”
I’m getting the horrible feeling she wants to pet me on the head like I’m a lap dog!
“Um.” I take a step away from her. “Thanks. This is all pretty strange to me.”
“Yes, it is,” Ella says in a soft, almost cajoling tone.
Oh my God! She thinks she’s being nice to me!
“Would you like something to eat or drink?” Ella asks, gesturing to the table nearby.
I want to run away from them, but I just nod, following the other women to the table.
I preferred Helen’s bitchiness.
As I sit with the others and try to answer their questions without exploding, I turn to watch Cassie. I see Helen bending down to talk to her, laughing and encouraging her to play with the others and test her strength.
At least they’ve accepted her. I couldn’t handle it if any one of them disrespected my baby girl.
I manage to get through the day, even though it’s probably the most infuriating experience of my life. Reactions from the other wolves range from Ella’s condescending curiosity right up to full-blown, barely concealed hostility, but I control my reactions so I don’t antagonize anyone.
I don’t have to do this forever, but I do have to keep things pleasant while we’re stuck here.
When we go home, I expect Cassie to protest, but she’s so worn out from playing all day that she happily gets into the car and collapses on the back seat, a massive smile on her face.
“Did you see me run, Mom?” she asks. “I beat some of the bigger kids, and I climbed the monkey bars, too!”
“Yes, baby, I saw!” I say, covering my fear with feigned excitement. “You can really climb!”
A three-year-old should not be able to climb like that. It freaked me the fuck out!
I push my discomfort down as I get in the car, knowing that I have to support Cassie in exploring her true nature and can’t ever show how much it scares me.
And it really does.
By the time we get home, Cassie is fast asleep. I take her up to our room and tuck her in, relieved that Rhys has disappeared to his room as I move around the house, getting something to eat and taking a shower.
I don’t want to have to deal with him constantly, so it’s good he’s not in my way, but after the treatment I received today, I can’t help thinking that his words at the wedding were true and he’s looking down on me, just like them.
A spike of rage I’ve been holding in all day rises in my throat, making me want to yell and scream.
I don’t care… why would I even care what he thinks?
I curl up next to Cassie, trying to clear my mind and relax so I can sleep.
***
I end up falling into an incredibly deep slumber, and when I wake, the full glory of the sun is streaming through the window.
Shit, I slept in! It’s late.
I run down the stairs, desperately looking for Cassie, hundreds of ugly possibilities running through my mind.
He’s taken her. I don’t know why or where, but she’s gone, and I’ll never see her again…
As I reach the kitchen, I hear Cassie’s laughter outside, and I go to the back door. In the small backyard, Cassie is playing tag with her father. She’s shrieking with laughter while he roars and walks around with overly menacing steps to plod after her, his hands up over his head.
I watch them run back and forth for a while, conflict twisting my guts.
It’s good they get along. I want that for her. But I can’t help feeling left out…
When they notice me, Rhys lifts Cassie up onto his shoulders and jogs over, both of them laughing and trying to wrestle each other. Cassie puts her hands over Rhys’s eyes, and he staggers around, pretending to be blind even though he can see through her fingers.
“Good morning, Mommy,” Cassie says, beaming. “We’re going to have breakfast, then go out and visit Rhys’s family. Does that sound fun?”
“Sure,” I say, trying to smile even though it feels like I’ve been shot through the chest.
This does not sound like my idea of fun.
When we get inside, Rhys makes pancakes while Cassie chats excitedly about all the games she played with Rhys that morning. I drink my coffee slowly, trying to be encouraging, but resentment is simmering deep inside me.
They’re so connected already, but I can’t tell her the truth. I never expected him to be so drawn to her, or for my baby girl to accept him like this… especially after he literally kidnapped us!
After breakfast, we get ready to go out, and again, I feel upset by having nothing nice to wear. Rhys doesn’t even seem to notice, which makes me feel worse, and we go out to the car with Cassie chattering brightly to Rhys while I walk behind.
Am I being paranoid, or are the clothes a deliberate statement about what they think of me?
Over the course of the day, we visit Rhys’s extended family. All of them are excited to meet Cassie and ignore me.
I’d try not to take it personally, except that it absolutely is personal.
For the first time, I see evidence of the disease.
Many of the older folks are confined to wheelchairs or cannot get up from bed, even though humans of the same age would still be mobile.
I notice signs of weakness in younger people as well, and a few of Cassie’s cousins are completely robbed of vitality, even though they’re still children.
I wish I could say I care, but really, all I care about is Cassie. Is this going to happen to her, too?
Ice-cold fear leaks through my chest as I imagine if Rhys had never come and we were going about our lives, only to have Cassie come down with a deadly disease no one could treat or identify.
I can’t shake the faint touch of fear, and it stays with me over the next few days as we fall into a routine. I watch Cassie closely for any signs of illness, but she seems more energetic than ever.
As days go by, I begin to feel more energized myself. I put it down to working so hard for so long; my body has now finally recovered with some good food and rest.
By the end of the week, however, I’m restless. During breakfast one morning, Rhys announces his duties are completed for now as far as introducing us to the others, and he’ll be going back to work.
Oh my God, he expects me to just sit around this house cooking and cleaning for him?
“What am I supposed to do?” I ask him, trying to keep my tone light but not succeeding.
“Anything you like, really,” Rhys says. “I don’t know if you have any hobbies? You can always go and spend time with the parents’ group.”
Fuck that.
“I want to work,” I say. “I’ve taken care of myself my whole life; I’ll get bored without a job to do.”
“I can provide for you,” Rhys says, taking a sip of coffee. “There’s really no need.”
I shake my head, feeling a bubble of panic rising in my chest.
I can’t get trapped in this house—or with the pack. I’ll go mad.
“I want to spend a lot more time with Cassie,” I say. “But I need a job. I have to maintain my independence—you can’t take that away from me.”
I won’t be your slave!
Rhys looks at me as if he knows I’m choosing my words carefully because we’re in front of Cassie. He can hear the echo of what I’d say if it weren’t filtered.
“Okay,” he says. “That’s not a problem, but I’m going with you on your job search.”
“Fine,” I say, defeated.
I might not be a slave, but I’m still a prisoner.