Chapter 47
Jack
Noel looks out the window, watching Morgan’s dad pull away. He grabs the van keys, the vehicle we bought using the money donated during the trial. I didn’t have a choice. Julie had done enough. I didn’t want to bother her endlessly for rides.
“I need to get to work,” Noel says. “Looks like Morgan can take you and Tommy to the center.”
I glance out of the window. Her big white truck shines in the early light.
Before I can respond, he’s out the door.
The house goes quiet in a way it never has before. Morgan is here. In my house. In the morning light. And for one dizzy second, I forget to panic, because this is what I wanted. Her. With me. Like something almost normal.
I close my eyes for a moment, letting it sink in. When they reopen, I startle. Morgan blocks my path. Gently, slowly, she takes my hands in hers. Her voice is soft, and she chooses each word carefully.
“Jack. I know this is a lot for you. It is for me, too.” She brings my knuckles to her lips, delivering a tender kiss.
That tiny kiss goes through me, electric yet grounding. Still, it makes wanting her worse, because she’s acting like she already has a place here, in my heart. And she knows she does. I made that clear at Tybee Island. She holds all the cards.
She kisses my knuckles once more. “If it gets too much, I’ll go to my parents until you’re ready. Okay?”
The thought hits like a knife: her leaving, this house empty again, her scent fading out of my sheets before I even get used to it.
No.
No, I don’t want ready. I want now.
I won’t entertain it for a moment. Besides, something else is more pressing. I shouldn’t ask. I already know the word wrecks me.
Still, I hear myself say, “You want to get married, or was that your dad pushing you?”
She grimaces hard. “We don’t have to talk about that right now.”
Of course she says that.
Of course she makes room for me when her father came in here trying to shove our whole future down our throats. It makes me want to drag her into my lap and kiss her until I can be as certain as she seems.
“Jack, why don’t you do what you need to, and... can I go to work with you?”
The center.
All day.
My pulse thunders against my eardrums.
“I don’t think you want to do that,” I answer.
Suddenly, she leads me toward the couch, pulling me to sit beside her. I collapse into the cushion as if I just ran a marathon.
With a gentle touch, she strokes my temple with her thumb. Her perfume wraps around me, and suddenly the house feels different. Warmer and smaller. Like there isn’t room in it for the version of me that used to survive here without her.
“I love you,” she says sweetly.
I side-eye her, but purse my lips together. It seems so easy for this woman. She must be in la-la land again. And maybe that should annoy me, but some reckless, starving part of me wants to believe her.
“One problem at a time, remember?”
I nod, but it isn’t one problem. It’s a hundred. She must see I’m wrecked, and sighs softly.
“Okay. I’ll work at the church today, and you can go about your day separately.”
I snatch her wrist so fast, she flinches. Regret flashes through me, but not enough to let go.
“Don’t,” I say. My voice comes out rough. “Don’t talk like you’re leaving.”
I pull her onto my lap and lock her in my arms. She cups my face, her smile stretching.
“Stay.” I swallow hard. “Come to work with me.”
Because I don’t want her to go. I need her by my side. Yes. This is what I want. We can do this. She’ll love the center.
I wince, not believing that for a second.
The center is particularly loud. It’s a full house today. I’m torn in every direction, which isn’t good. I wanted Morgan to ease into the madness, not drown in it.
By lunch, I glance over. She’s opening kitchen cupboards to learn where things are. She helps set out plates and cups. She studies everything, listens, tries to predict how to help next.
Sometimes, she stares at nothing, and I wonder what she’s thinking. This isn’t a megachurch with tons of staff and everything’s clean and modern.
I clutch my chest for a second as my heart punches my ribs. It’s possible she’s already planning an escape.
However, she doesn’t complain. Every little thing she does is perfect, and lands wrong and right at the same time.
A smile at Tommy. A hand on my shoulder. Her purse in my chair.
She is turning my life into something softer, and instead of relaxing, I feel myself bracing for the moment it gets ripped away.
After recreational time, a woman crew member, Eddie, walks inside with the front of her pants wet.
Fuck, she had an accident.
I look around for Julie, but she’s busy. I go to the clothes bin and find some pants that seem about her size.
“Eddie, come here.” I hold out the pants and speak lower. “You need to change, okay?”
Her face reddens, embarrassed.
I groan softly. Julie should’ve told her. It’s better coming from another woman.
Out of nowhere, Morgan hooks her arm with Eddie’s.
“Those are nice pants!” She takes them from me. “How about we do a fashion show? Follow me.”
“Ya!” replies Eddie, now smiling.
Morgan leads her towards the bathrooms, chattering to each other.
I watch, stunned how well Morgan handled that awkward moment. Christ, maybe she won’t run.
Don’t think that, Jack. It’s too early. Hasn’t been a day.
By evening, I lock the back door, then check and tidy each room. As I move, I switch off lights. Morgan waits for me at the front desk with Tommy, sweeping under the desk.
I don’t want to take a step closer. This might be the last time I see her here, tangled in my work — an angel that doesn’t belong with mortals like me.
She catches me watching and smiles. I force myself forward.
“First day, okay?” I ask casually.
“Yeah. I’m tired, though.”
I cringe and rub the back of my neck.
“It’s hard.” I mumble. The tension builds and I can’t stand it. “You don’t have to work here. You can work at the church.”
She scrunches her brow. “Well, yeah, I planned to keep working at the church.”
“Oh. Of course you did.”
“But I want to work here too.”
“You do?”
She grins widely. “A couple of days a week would be nice. Honestly, I don’t know how you do all this, Jack.” She takes my hand. “I know I struggled to keep up with you today, but I’ll get better.”
My eyes widen, shocked she thinks she didn’t do enough. I hold her tight and kiss the top of her head. I speak into her hair.
“Don’t think that, alright? You were perfect.”
“I was?” she whispers.
“Yes.”
I can’t linger here. She’ll think I’m weak, so I let go of her quickly. I call Tommy and usher both of them out of the door.
I’m not weak. I’m skeptical, and I should be.
Although, as we ride back to the house, I can’t help but wonder if her dad got inside my head.
I mean, look at this girl. She wants to come back.
She didn’t fall to pieces. There is a reason I fell for her.
It isn’t just that incredible body and sexy smile.
She may be rich, but she’s giving and kind.
Yeah, fuck her dad and his mind games.
“Hey,” she says. “On Sunday, do you want to come to the morning service, or evening?”
“Uh.”
“Probably morning would be best. My dad leads that one. Blake leads the evening service.” She taps her fingers together, excited. “I want to show you my workplace.”
I grip the steering wheel.
“And the sermon my dad has planned is so touching. He told me all about it.”
I sit back in the seat more. As casually as I can, I ask a question I wish I didn’t have to.
“Hey Morgan. You, uh, you aren’t trying to convert me, right?”
Her spine straightens.
“No! Absolutely not.” She gives a toothy grin.
Shit.