22. Henrik
TWENTY-TWO
HENRIK
After a steamy kiss that almost melts my wool socks off and certainly fogs up my truck windows, I look at Carina. “Did that beach walk work up an appetite?” She nods. “How about we grab sandwiches and then head to the Brina?”
“I’m starving,” she says against my lips.
When I pull away, her eyes are filled with lust, and I’m tempted to skip the sandwiches and head to my house instead.
No. I chastise myself. This isn’t just a roll in the sheets.
This is spending time with the woman who’s consumed every thought I’ve had for months.
A woman I’ve been desperate to see and spend time with all week.
Throwing the truck in gear, I head for town before I can talk myself out of it.
It isn’t quite noon yet, so the café isn’t busy. Fifteen minutes later, we’re back in the truck and on our way to the docks.
Hand in hand, we walk toward the Brina. “Is the Brina the only crabber your family has owned?” Carina asks.
“No, my grandfather was partners on another boat, the FV Legacy, when he was younger. When he and his partner split ways, my grandpa built the FV Brina.” Standing before her, I admit, “At almost thirty-five years old, she’s still gorgeous.
” Her white-painted bow glistens in the sun, and my chest fills with pride.
Carina smiles. “She sure is. Can we go on board and look around? I’ve been around the docks my entire life and have been on many boats, but never a crabber.”
“Really?” I ask, genuinely surprised. “I thought you may have helped with NOAA’s bottom trawl survey last year.”
“I didn’t, but that study’s connected to why I worked so many extra hours this past week.”
I help her onto the Brina. “Yeah?” I question, and she nods her reply. “Tour or food first?” I ask.
Grinning, and without hesitation, she answers, “Tour.”
Thirty minutes and one tour later, we’re seated in the galley, enjoying our sandwiches.
“This is quite a boat. I can’t believe you have enough room in your cabin for a queen-sized bed.
Wouldn’t a full or twin suffice? I mean, unless you’re entertaining a guest. I know you’ve been at sea for a long time.
Have you ever… um… had female companionship with you?
” Her rambling is adorable. I laugh. She startles and then mumbles, “Sorry, I shouldn’t have asked that; it was none of my business.
” I place my hand over hers as she nervously worries through a paper napkin.
“Carina,” I say, and she stills. “Other than my mom, Mia, and Eirik’s mom, you’re the only woman who’s ever been on board the Brina.”
Her eyes sparkle. “Really?”
Lifting my hand like the Boy Scout I never was, I say, “I promise. There’s an old fisherman’s superstition that says allowing a woman onboard is bad luck.”
Her eyes go wide. Flustered, she gathers her things. “Then I need to get off the boat now. I don’t want anything bad to happen to you.”
I grab her hand and place it over my heart. “Nothing is going to happen. I don’t believe in that superstition. My mom and Mia have been on the boat several times. But I’ve used it for years to keep the guys from bringing their ladies on board.”
Once our lunch is finished, Carina stands up to gather all our trash.
Standing next to her, I reach over, pick her up, and toss her over my shoulder.
The laughter that falls from her lips is music to my ears.
My body heats as I head back to my cabin.
When I toss her onto my mattress, she squeals.
Eager to have my lips on her again, I crawl after her.
Holding my much larger body over hers, I wait for her to make the first move.
Staring into her bright eyes, I feel her hands wrap around my neck just before she pulls me down to her.
Spreading her legs, I settle between them with a grunt.
She wraps her legs around me and uses her heels to push me forward.
My thick cock rubs against her center. Even with the various layers of clothing, I can feel the heat coming off her.
Releasing a rumble from deep in my chest, she shivers underneath me.
Licking up the side of her neck to her earlobe, I nibble at the soft skin before saying, “You shivered. Are you warm enough, beautiful?” I feel her nod.
“Ever since I saw you on the dock when we left in October, I’ve wanted to get you right here,” I confess.
“In your bed?” she asks in a breathy, sexy-as-hell voice that registers in my cock.
“No… on my boat,” I admit with a laugh. “I guess the bed part’s true too.”
“But you said women aren’t allowed on boats. They’re bad luck,” she counters, her words laced with concern.
Pushing back the stray pieces of her blonde hair, I place a kiss on her nose. “I already told you, I don’t believe in that superstition. There is nothing bad or cursed about you. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the opposite. I’m lucky to have found you, and it feels so good to call you mine.”
“I’m yours?” she asks with a raised eyebrow.
“Yes, you are. I know we haven’t been dating very long, but the connection I have with you is unreal.
You make me feel so much. And I want things I’ve never considered before.
Even though that’s terrifying as fuck, it’s oddly comforting too.
I don’t know what it all means, but I know how incredibly special you are, and I know how lucky I am to have you in my life. ”
A sweet sigh falls from her lips as she rubs her hands up and down my forearms that have her caged underneath me. “And you said you’re not good with emotions.”
“I’m not,” I protest.
She blows out a breath like she’s frustrated with me. “No? Because that was the perfect thing to say.”
Overwhelmed by the moment, I resort to something I can handle. I lower my body, dropping a soft kiss against her lips before moving to my side and tucking her into it.
Lying there with Carina wrapped in my arms, I whisper in her ear, “Can you tell me how you know Norma?”
“Norma had been like an aunt to me. She was dating my uncle Jakob when he was lost at sea.
Before we lost him, they came over to our house often for family meals.
Even though I was only ten, I remember how much they cared for each other.
Right before the accident, I heard my parents talk about how Jakob and Norma were getting married.
“Losing him was devastating for so many. For many years following his death, I didn’t see her and then right after I started driving, I visited Glass Beach and we ran into each other.
It was awkward at first, but until I left for college, our paths crossed multiple times as she was walking her previous dog, Baraby, and I was hunting for sea glass. ”
“Do you know if they were engaged?” I ask. She shakes her head. Pulling her hand to my mouth, I kiss her fingertips.
“One minute they’re there and the next, they’re not. I can’t even imagine losing someone, especially someone I love, in such a tragic way. You don’t even have a body to bury.”
I feel a shiver shake her body. “Are you warm enough?” I ask as I pull her closer.
Nodding, she says, “Losing someone like that? It’s my greatest fear.” Looking down at her, I see her eyes are wet and she’s staring off into the distance.
She’ll have to face that fear every time I go fishing.
The realization of her confession sits heavy on my chest. It’s like I have a massive boulder resting on top of my ribcage, threatening to crush me.
“I think that’s why Norma does daily beach walks.
It’s cathartic. It helps her feel close to Jakob, her one true love. ”
With her nuzzled next to me, I consider what she said. “Wow,” I mutter against her head as I run my fingers through her soft hair.
Carina yawns and then quiets. My mind is anything but.
Thoughts, concerns, and fears overwhelm me, and vie for positions of importance.
I don’t know which to confront first. Breathing out, I remind myself to embrace the facts.
Yes, I have one of the deadliest jobs in the world.
But safety is always a top priority. My boat is well-constructed and maintained.
I trust my crew. I don’t take unnecessary risks.
I’ll always do whatever I need in order to return home safely.
Looking at the gorgeous woman in my arms, I wonder if my life will be too much for Carina to handle. A fisherman’s partner has to be sturdy and strong. I know she’s both of those things, but the question is whether she’ll want to step into that role.
Fear invades my mind, and my stomach tightens.
Would it be worth asking her to take that risk for me?
To conquer that fear she’s held for so long?
Until earlier, we hadn’t even talked about our feelings for one another.
What if she isn’t as serious about me as I am about her?
Holding her tight, I know I don’t want to lose her.
But I also don’t want to ask her to overlook her fears and concerns to be with me.
An image of my mom pops into my mind, and a smile tugs at my lips.
She is the strongest woman I’ve ever known.
While we were growing up, she never once showed concern that Dad wouldn’t come home.
When I joined the crew, then Edgar a few years later, I saw small glimpses of her fear.
But when it was time to set sail, she always held her head high and forced a smile to her lips.
She knew that her fear could be a distraction to us, so she kept it to herself.
Like always, she put our needs in front of her own.
She buried her worry and concern, told us she loved us, and diligently prayed for our safe return.
Could I ask Carina to do the same, knowing what she’s been through?
While she sleeps in my arms, I wrestle with that.