Chapter 26 Katerina
KATERINA
The warmth of Luca's body blankets mine as he collapses beside me, pulling me against his chest.
His heartbeat thunders against mine, our breathing still ragged. I should feel sated.
Content.
Instead, my mind whirs with conflict even as my body hums with pleasure.
Damn him for making me feel this way. Damn me for letting him.
I’d been doing so well keeping him at a distance as time runs out for us. But guilt had me second-guessing what I needed to do.
It’s not fair to keep secrets from Luca when it’s his life on the line.
Then again, I have no doubt he’d give his own for Enzo, which is likely what’s going to happen.
Unable to face Luca, I woke Enzo to get ready for school and then retreated to the bedroom and wept uncontrollably.
I couldn’t pull it together to make Enzo breakfast.
I listened as Luca made Enzo pancakes and gushed over his school project.
My heart swelled with love even as it split in two.
When I finally pulled myself together to see Enzo off to school, my need for Luca overwhelmed my desire to push him away.
And now I’m here, naked in his arms, as confused and heartbroken as ever.
My body still tingles where his hands gripped me, where his mouth claimed me.
The memory of his touch sends another wave of heat through me, and I'm irritated by my own weakness.
How can I still want him when I know he'll leave again?
When I know what might be coming?
"What are you thinking?" he murmurs, pressing his lips to my forehead.
That I might have to betray you to save our son.
"Nothing important," I lie, shifting to avoid looking into his face.
I love him. Despite everything, I love him, which makes this situation a real-life tragedy.
"You're doing it again," Luca says, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. "Disappearing inside your head."
I force a smile. "Just tired."
His eyes narrow slightly. He doesn't believe me, but he doesn't push. Instead, he pulls me closer, his hand trailing lazily up and down my spine.
My skin comes alive under his touch, craving more even as my mind screams warnings.
This is the chaos he creates in me.
Desire and fear, love and resentment, need and caution all tangled together, driving me mad.
I’ve lost the war to protect my heart.
Even after we rise from bed and dress after having sex in the shower, even after we spend the day apart at our own jobs, even after playing with our son, we end up back here in bed, our bodies wrapped up in each other.
As Enzo sleeps, Luca worships my body with hands and mouth. I come from both before he even enters me.
The pleasure feels more than sexual.
It’s like he lights up my soul, so I hand myself over to him fully.
If all this is going to end, I owe it to all of us to fully embrace the beauty of our love, right?
That’s what I tell myself as I fall asleep in his arms, praying that tomorrow, we’ll have another day to live and love.
The sharp crack of gunfire jolts me upright.
Panic consumes me as more shots follow, closer this time.
Shouts and screams pierce the morning air.
"Enzo."
Luca's already on his feet, pulling on his pants, reaching for the gun he keeps under the mattress. "Stay here.”
But I'm already moving, yanking on my robe as I sprint down the hallway.
Another volley of gunshots, followed by the sound of breaking glass in the living room.
My heart hammers so hard I can barely breathe.
I burst into Enzo's room, nearly collapsing with relief when I see him sitting up in bed, eyes wide with confusion and fear, clutching his teddy bear.
"Mama?"
"Hush, baby," I whisper, rushing to him. "We need to be very quiet."
More gunfire. Is the cottage surrounded? Where are Alessandro’s men?
I scoop Enzo up, blanket and all, pressing him against me as I bring us to the floor for protection. His little heart beats wildly against mine.
"What's happening?" he whispers.
Before I can respond, glass explodes inward as bullets shatter the window.
I throw myself over Enzo, shielding his small body with mine. Shards rain down on my back. My son's terrified whimper breaks me.
"Stay down, baby." I press him into the floor. I want to move us to the closet but the path could expose us to more shots.
His eyes are huge, swimming with tears.
The bedroom door crashes open and I regret not having something to protect us like a gun.
Maksim's words echo in my head. Enzo will pay.
I kiss Enzo's forehead for what I fear will be the last time.
"Katerina!" Luca's voice rings out, desperate and raw. "Enzo!"
I realize that it’s not Maksim or his men who’ve burst in. Luca stands there, gun at his side. He rushes toward us, pulling Enzo up, gathering him close with one arm, reaching for me with the other.
The three of us collapse together in relief.
"I thought I lost you.” His voice is heavy with emotion. "Both of you."
“Luca!” Alessandro’s voice echoes through the cottage.
“Back here,” Luca calls but doesn’t move to meet them.
Moments later, Alessandro and Adriano burst in, guns drawn. Their expressions shift from battle-ready to relief when they see us huddled together.
"Thank God," Alessandro breathes, lowering his weapon. Blood streaks his face, but I don't think it’s his. "You're all right."
Adriano leaves for a moment and then returns. "Everything is clear."
I clutch Enzo and Luca tighter, my body still shaking with adrenaline.
Enzo’s small face is buried against Luca's chest, fingers gripping his father's shirt so tightly we might have to peel them off.
For a moment, we simply exist. But then Luca rises, handing Enzo to me. “Bratva has some fucking nerve.” He starts to leave, and I know what’s going on, and it’s a suicide mission.
Alessandro steps in his way.
“Don’t stop me.” Luca’s voice is deadly.
“If you want to die today, be my guest. You may have had luck in the past being a stupid asshole, but if you go after them now, you’ll die. Is that what you want?”
Enzo wails. “I don’t want Daddy to die.”
I stand on shaky legs. “He shouldn’t hear this.”
Luca shakes his head. “No. He shouldn’t.” He turns. “I won’t die, buddy.”
But we all know he can’t make that promise.
He turns back to Alessandro. "They got into the compound. They came for my family. How?"
Alessandro's jaw tightens. "Security breach at the east gate. We're still counting bodies."
"This wasn't just another attack." Luca steps closer to his brother, fury radiating from him in waves. "They were after Katerina and Enzo."
I close my eyes as reality hits. I’d waited too long to respond to Maksim’s ultimatum and he’d come for Enzo.
“So it appears.”
The magnitude of what just happened washes over me. We could have died. Enzo could have died. All because I was too torn between my heart and my fear to make a choice.
“It means there’s still someone in our midst giving info to the Bratva,” Adriano states.
"We need to move you all to a safer location," Alessandro says, meeting my eyes directly for the first time. There's something new in his gaze. Almost as he sees me as family, not Bratva. "The main house has better security."
Luca turns to me, his expression softening as he takes in Enzo's trembling form in my arms. He reaches out, his hand gentle as it cups our son's cheek.
"No one will ever get this close to you again," he promises, his eyes burning with conviction. "I swear it on my life."
My throat tightens with emotion. This is my fault.
"Luca. I need to tell you something—about the phone call the other day."
His expression changes. It’s wary. As if he knows what I’m going to say and is disappointed in me. "They contacted you."
I nod, shame and guilt washing through me. "Maksim threatened Enzo if I didn't…" I can't finish, not with our son's ears so close.
Luca understands, but there's no accusation in his eyes.
"We end this," he says. "Today."
We don’t gather anything as we leave the cottage and head to the main house.
I follow Luca, Enzo still wrapped in my arms.
His small body feels heavier now, exhaustion replacing adrenaline.
He hasn't spoken since we left the cottage, his face pressed against my neck, damp with tears.
Alessandro walks ahead, barking orders at men who move quickly and efficiently, securing entrances, checking windows.
"You'll stay in my room," Luca says, his hand at the small of my back as he guides us up the grand staircase. “Enzo too.”
I nod, too drained to argue.
The smell of gunpowder and blood clings to him.
Some of it has transferred to my robe.
To Enzo.
When we reach Luca's rooms, he pushes the door open. "I'll have guards posted outside," he says, checking the windows, the bathroom, the closet. "I need to meet with my brothers, figure out our next move."
He's all business now, the tender lover from hours ago replaced by the ruthless enforcer.
After he leaves, I carry Enzo to the massive bed, settling us among pillows that smell like Luca.
Enzo finally lifts his head. "Are the bad men gone?"
"Yes, baby. Your daddy made sure of it." I smooth his hair back from his forehead. "You were so brave."
His bottom lip trembles. "I was scared."
"Being brave doesn't mean you're not scared. It means doing the right thing even when you are scared." I press my forehead to his.
As I hold my son, rocking him gently until his breathing steadies, guilt continues to overwhelm me.
I could have prevented this.
If I'd gone to Luca immediately after Maksim's call, if I hadn't hesitated…
Pyotr's face flashes in my mind, not as he was in death, but as the brother who taught me to ride a bike, who held my hand at our parents' funeral.
Another failure.
Another person I couldn't save because I waited too long to act.
Now Enzo has paid the price for my indecision.
My beautiful boy, traumatized by violence no child should witness, all because I was too afraid to choose.
I kiss Enzo's forehead as he finally drifts to sleep.
The sound of hushed voices filters through the door.
Our protection.
The fortress is locked down.
But fortresses can be breached.
We learned that lesson today.
Maksim won't stop. The Bratva wants Luca's head, and they'll burn everything to get it, including my son.
As I hold my son, I realize that I could still end this.
One call. One betrayal.
The thought makes me physically ill. I carefully extract myself from Enzo and rush to the bathroom.
My stomach heaves, but nothing comes up since I haven’t eaten.
I turn on the sink faucet, splashing cold water on my face, avoiding my reflection.
I can't bear to see the woman who's even contemplating such treachery.
But isn't a mother supposed to do anything to protect her child? Even if it means sacrificing the man she loves?
Still… there has to be another way. A path where I don't have to choose between them, where I don't have to play God with the lives of the people I love most.
I return to bed, watching Enzo's peaceful face.
I press my hand over my mouth to keep a cry from escaping as I realize there’s only one choice I can make.