Chapter Fifteen #3
“You want something?” I asked, lifting my hips and then rocking back into her. My motions were small, just enough to create some friction but not enough to really even qualify as a thrust.
It seemed to more than do the trick with her. She brought her hands to my back and clung to me, nails digging into my skin.
It wasn’t until I began picking up speed and deepening my thrusts that I finally kissed her. Her lips were soft against mine, open and desperate but still somehow gentle. Caring. Almost loving. I’d never kissed anyone like that before, even Leah. It was new, different.
I liked it.
We took our time together on this round, teasing each other and slowing down when it seemed like Leah was too close to finishing. Even Leah seemed to have finally figured out how to slow her pace with me, no longer rushing me to some finish line.
I slowly increased my speed again until Leah was moaning against my mouth. I kept us physically close enough for our lips to still brush, just shy of kissing her. I could see her face had gone tight, brows furrowed.
“You’re so fucking beautiful, Leah,” I breathed out.
I had zero concern over my stamina—I didn’t train sometimes four hours a day for me to ever get tired in bed.
There was only one reason I was this breathless, and it had everything to do with how Leah made me feel.
“I could look at you like this all day.”
Even though it was meant to be hot, my stomach dropped. That felt way too far. Telling her she was sexy, beautiful, the best I’d ever had in bed—any of those were acceptable. But telling her I could look at her? Telling her she looked fucking beautiful?
I wasn’t going to take it back—taking it back would’ve been a lie—but if she asked, I was going to have to find a way to somehow downplay that. That felt more like a confession than dirty talk, and I didn’t have the capacity to work through that. Not while I was literally inside of her, at least.
Fortunately, Leah seemed unfazed. She either didn’t even really hear me, or she was doing a really good job of ignoring me and pretending she didn’t hear it.
Leah then closed the gap between us, kissing me again.
We moved our bodies together, nearly every inch of available skin touching.
I’d never felt so physically close to someone.
Sex had always been a good time, but I now understood what people meant when it came to sex with someone who mattered. Nothing could ever compare to this.
She held on tight, but kept her eyes open and on me instead of closing them. I didn’t look away, either. Even as I readjusted hers and my hips to get as deep into her as possible, she seemed determined not to take her eyes off of me.
“Oh,” she softly moaned. Her breath caught, her body tensing around mine. As her orgasm built up and then came crashing down, she still kept her eyes fixed on me.
Her legs trembled around me, but the rest of her body relaxed.
I brushed the hair away from her temple and gently kissed it.
Before I could move my hand away, she reached up and held her own hand against mine, leaning into my touch.
She turned her head and kissed the inside of my wrist, by far the most intimate thing anyone had ever done to me before.
And I couldn’t lie—I loved it.
I slipped out of her slowly, and she softly gasped again from the sensation of the strap leaving her body.
After taking my boxers off and leaving them and the strap in a pile on my floor, I got into bed and took her in my arms.
“Oh my god,” Leah breathed, her chest still rising and falling. “That was unbelievable.”
I kissed her, overwhelmed by how badly I wanted to.
She kissed me back deeply, her lips warm against mine.
She opened her mouth for me, and we let our tongues explore.
It was hot—so fucking hot—but it didn’t feel like foreplay.
It was honest, true-blue intimacy. It was something shifting between us; I could feel it.
It was so undeniable that I knew she had to feel it too.
When we finally broke our kiss, I looked at her and just knew that I was in trouble.
I could feel it in every inch of my body.
For the first time ever, the girl in my bed wasn’t just some girl in my bed.
She was someone who actually meant something to me.
And even though that was the scariest fucking feeling in the world, I was dying to say that to her.
But I couldn’t. It felt too soon and too weird—this was meant to be casual.
It’d never been said to be anything else otherwise.
And bringing feelings into hooking up was the fastest way to ruin a good thing; I didn’t know from having done it before, but I knew how it felt to be on the receiving end.
Suddenly, I had a lot more sympathy for the girls who’d been brave enough to shoot their shot with me. This was a nightmare.
I pulled my attention away from her face, thinking about anything else—the homework I needed to do, the games that were coming up, what Ellie and I were going to work on during our next training session—so I didn’t say something that would mess everything up.
“Should we finally eat now?” I offered, the best I could come up with.