Chapter 12
Chapter Twelve
COLE
Four bags & a heartbeat
“Cole, hon, I need you over at the barn,” my mother said.
“Me?” I gestured to myself.
“I said your name,” she replied tartly.
I eyed her warily. “Why do you need me over there?”
“Adele needs help moving in.”
Of course I wanted to see Adele, but I wasn’t about to say that out loud. Not around this crowd.
“She has a heart condition,” my mother added.
I knew she said that to elicit twinges of guilt, and it was completely effective.
I tried to hedge. “Excuse me? You hired her to help us lead hikes, and now you’re saying she can’t move into an apartment?”
Before my mother could reply, Tommy, who was busy getting something ready in the kitchen, chimed in, “I already told you, I like you and Adele together. I’m the matchmaker in this family.”
“You’re the cook,” I pointed out, deciding to ignore this entire line of conversation around Adele.
“I’m the chef,” Tommy corrected, with great dignity.
“Please help Adele. We want her to feel welcome,” my mother pressed.
“Of course I’ll help her, Mom,” I ground out.
“Enough with the attitude. You know you want to see her.”
I refused to even make eye contact with my mother at that comment. She’d read right through me. “When’s she gonna be here?” I glanced at the clock on the wall above the doorway.
“She’s probably already there.”
“And you’re not over there to help?” I questioned.
“I’m not. I’m old and my knees aren’t in the best shape.” This from my mother who almost never acknowledged any weakness.
Tommy swiveled to look at her, his mouth dropping open. “Grandma, you’re not that old.”
“Oh, I’m old. I don’t move things, that’s for sure.”
“You don’t?” Chloe asked as she stopped at the end of the hallway that led to the offices.
At that moment, Lincoln appeared from the other entrance to the kitchen, clearly having heard the same comment.
“Since when don’t you move things, Mom? You’ve always been so proud that you’re staying strong. You’ve got your garden, you’ve been helping get the resort ready…”
I happened to notice Lincoln’s gaze slide to Chloe really quick—lingering a few beats too long. But now definitely wasn’t the time to point that out.
My mother ignored everyone, her pointed gaze locked on me. “Cole, would you please go help Adele move her things in?”
“Yes, ma’am. Lincoln’s got hands too, by the way,” I couldn’t help but add.
“I’m helping Chloe relocate the filing cabinets,” Lincoln countered, his tone a sharp edge.
Chloe narrowed her eyes at him. “What’s wrong with helping me?”
“Nothing,” Lincoln said a little too quickly.
“I’m outta here,” I called over my shoulder, catching Lincoln’s eye and giving him a teasing wink.
My mom was in matchmaking overdrive these days. Ever since Haven, and then Jude, had gone and fallen in love, she wanted us all matched up, shacked up, and probably making babies as fast as humanly possible.
Which, come to think of it, I wasn’t so sure I wanted a baby yet. But I wouldn’t mind the act of trying to make one. With Adele.
But I didn’t need to be contemplating that. Not now. All I did was casual. All the while I kept silently reminding myself of that fact, Adele made me question every damn thing about my attitude toward relationships.
A short walk later, I was standing outside the barn, eyeing Adele—who was conveniently leaning into the back of her hatchback, talking under her breath. “Why did I bring this? I don’t even know what this is for.”
I cleared my throat. She squeaked and straightened, spinning to face me quickly.
I immediately regretted alerting her to my presence.
Her bottom was perfect—cute and lush—and I instantly missed savoring the view.
Of course, I wouldn’t have minded seeing her bent over in other places, but— My thoughts scratched like a needle stopping on a record.
Don’t be an idiot, my cynical brain chimed in. Get a grip.
Adele’s cheeks were pink, and all I could think about was the way her lips had felt against mine when we kissed.
“Hi,” she said, her voice pitched a little too high.
“Hey there. Came over to help you move in.”
“Oh. You didn’t have to do that.”
“Maybe not, but I’m happy to help.”
“No, really, Cole. You don’t have to.”
Stuffing my hands in my pockets, I scuffed the heel of my boot on the gravel. “My mom asked me to help. You know she’ll take it personally and hold it against me if I don’t. So…please let me help.”
Adele pressed her lips together to keep from laughing. And damn if it didn’t make my heart swell when her smile stretched across her face like rays of sun breaking over the horizon.
“Well, in that case, I wouldn’t want her to hold it against you.” She gestured toward her open trunk. “That’s what we have to move.”
I glanced in and counted four bags. “This is it?”
“I travel light. I actually brought a little more than I normally would because, well…I don’t have a home base.
I have enough gear for any trips and some clothes for the changes of season.
How about you take two, and I’ll take two?
” Her tone was crisp, but her cheeks were pink and she tapped her fingertips against her leg.
She was nervous, and I wanted to wrap her in my arms and ease away her apprehension.
I forced myself to take a breath, to be rational. I wanted to argue the point and insist I’d carry all four, but I could tell from the lift of Adele’s chin that she was going to argue back. So I simply nodded. “You got it.”
A few minutes later, we’d dropped all four bags on the floor inside the small apartment.
“This is cute,” Adele said. “It’s perfect for one or two people.”
“It is.”
As my gaze arced about the space, a wave of memories crashed into me. This apartment represented a painful time in our family’s life, loaded with emotions with all of us swimming through our own waves of grief.
“Cole?” Adele’s voice brought me back to the present moment.
“This is where we stayed after the fire for a while.” I surprised myself. I hadn’t intended to explain, but something about her whisked away my guard.
Her gaze was somber. “Your mom mentioned that.”
I took a quick breath, steadying myself inside. “A while ago, Haven and Elsa were staying here, but they built their own place next door.”
“Wow,” Adele breathed, her tone solemn. I watched as her gaze circled the space. “This must have been crowded.”
“It sure felt crowded.” I chuckled. “The bedrooms are all small. It was okay. We were family, and we needed each other then. As hard as it was…” Pausing, I cleared my throat.
“We needed to be here.” I gestured out the windows, tracing an arc of the view outside with my hand.
“This is our home, our land. I know that from a technical perspective, borders, lines on a map and so on, might sound meaningless, but this place?” I curled my palm into a loose fist and thumped it over my heart.
“It’s our heartbeat. Heartfire Falls is home for us, and it always will be. ”
When I met Adele’s gaze again, there was a sheen of tears in her eyes. “I’m so sorry for all you went through.”
“I didn’t mean to get so deep,” I said quickly, trying to dodge the moment and make light of it.
But she shook her head. “It’s okay. Big things happen in life. Sometimes we just have to let ourselves feel them.”
The silence that followed felt loaded between us, but not uncomfortable. Somehow, in the space of a short time, Adele had become something I didn’t quite know how to define. But I felt it. It was something I’d never experienced and didn’t know what to do with.
She gestured toward the front of the barn. “The sign outside is beautiful.”
I smiled. “It is. Elsa painted it.”
“Oh, she did?”
“Yeah. Somehow it survived the fire. Although so did this whole barn, which is kind of a miracle, but maybe not because it was in a clearing. Anyway, she and Haven live on the property next door now. She knew what it used to look like. I think she’d say she’s not an artist, but she had a nice touch with that, and we love it. ”
“That’s so cool. I love that.” Adele fell quiet again, her gaze thoughtful before she blurted, “Are you okay that your mom offered me a job?”
Her question took me aback. “What do you mean? Of course I’m okay.”
“No, I just…” She paused, nervously sliding her fingers together in one hand while twirling the end of her ponytail with the other. “I mean, this place is obviously your family’s. It feels a little weird. But she offered.”
No matter what reservations I had about Adele—which really had nothing to do with anyone or anything other than my own damn inconvenient, roaring lust for her—I felt compelled to reassure her. I knew, for whatever reason, this was something she needed. Even if I didn’t fully comprehend why.
“You absolutely belong here. If my mom wants you to be here, then we all want you to be here. I’m not saying that just to be nice.
Plus, you’re not the only non-family member that works here.
Chloe works here. We’ve got contractors who come and go, and we hire people from town to help with local trips when we’re too busy.
” I held her gaze. “But Adele, I mean this. I don’t know why, but I think it’s good for you to be here. I already know you can hike.”
She blinked and let out a quick sigh. “I know, but…” Uncertainty flickered in her gaze.
“Your mom offered me the job, and I jumped on it. But the reality is, I can’t do any of the longer hikes unless one of you guys is with me, because…
”—clearing her throat, she gestured toward her chest—“because of my heart.”
“That’s okay. We never lead longer hikes alone. Maybe a day hike, but even those are only a few hours, and you never know what’s gonna happen on a hike. Frankly, your situation is easier to plan for than an unprepared customer—or me, or one of my brothers—being stupid.”
She bit her bottom lip and let out a soft huff of a laugh. “Are you sure?”
“Of course I’m sure.”
Before I knew it, I stepped closer and put my hands on her shoulders. I meant it to be reassuring. But touching her felt like touching a live wire—not her specifically, but us, and whatever this was that burned between us.
She blinked up at me, a flush rising on her cheeks.
“I’m sure,” I added, my tone husky and low. Yet again, I wanted to kiss her. Because for fuck’s sake, I always wanted to kiss her when I was close to her.
“My mom’s gonna expect you to come to dinner,” I said, trying to think of anything to distract me from kissing Adele.
“Well, that’s the thing. I said I’d move in today, and Jasmine invited me to card night,” she said quickly.
I filled in the blanks. “Oh, you should do that.”
“You know about that?” Her eyes widened.
“Of course I do. Elsa, Chloe, and Kendall often go. Mom will want you to go. Come with me to the main house. At least say hi to her.”
“Are you sure? I mean… I…”
I was relieved to have something to talk about to keep me from wanting to kiss her and being stupid enough to act on the urge.
I forced myself to take my hands off her shoulders and turned toward the door.
“Come on. We’ll find out if Elsa’s going.
Chloe’s probably going too. I’m sure one of them can give you a ride. ”
As I started walking outside a moment later, with just her presence beside me, it felt like there was some kind of line connecting us, a flickering sizzle of electricity.
Her stride was long and confident, and she looked around as we walked. “It’s so pretty here.”
“You’ve been all over Alaska,” I pointed out. “Everywhere is pretty.”
She cast me a lopsided smile. “It is.”
“Do you have a favorite part of Alaska?”
She tipped her head to the side, idly kicking a stone as we walked.
“I don’t know. I actually like this part of Alaska a lot. Southeast is stunning, but it’s a little too rainy for me. I love where I grew up outside of Fairbanks.”
“But winters are long,” I added.
“They sure are,” she agreed.
“Are your parents still up there?”
“They are. They love it.”
“You mentioned you have a sister.”
She looked surprised I remembered when she glanced over. “I do. She’s in Anchorage.”
“Well, that’s close.”
Her smile turned a little bashful. “Yeah. I’m hoping she’ll come visit.” The flare of hope in her eyes made my heart twist a little.
While I didn’t know all the details of Adele’s life, I sensed there was some complexity, maybe sadness, tangled up around her family. Specifically, her sister. If there was one thing I understood, it was the complexities of family and all the emotions that came with it.
I loved my family. All my brothers, the sister we lost, and the father we lost. But love didn’t mean things were easy or smooth or picture-postcard ready.
“I’m sure she will,” I said softly. “Anchorage isn’t far.”
Adele nodded before she took a quick breath. She gestured her thumb over her shoulder as she stopped walking. “Thank you for helping me carry everything upstairs.”
“Of course.”
As she looked up at me, for a moment, it felt like I had fallen into a forest. Her eyes were so stunning. Looking into them was like looking through a canopy of green leaves shot through with sunlight falling in misty shafts and casting everything in a soft glow.
I didn’t realize I’d gone quiet until Adele prompted, “Cole?”
I gave my head a shake and cleared my throat before asking, “Do you need a ride anywhere?”
She looked puzzled. “No. I’m here. I have my car,” she pointed out. “By the way, thank you again for fixing the wires the squirrels chewed.”
I chuckled. “No problem. Turned out not as bad as it could’ve been.”
“So anyway, I don’t need a ride,” she added.
For a beat, I was confused, but then remembered I’d asked her a question. Fuck me. This woman had my brain scrambled.
“I hope I can ride into town with Chloe or Elsa, but just because I don’t want to show up on my own. Do you guys have your own card night?”
I chuckled. “We do. Sometimes.”
I almost asked her—again—if she planned to eat dinner here at the resort. This conversation was starting to feel repetitive, and I realized the issue. I wanted to linger. I was usually a little more socially skilled than this.
Adele blinked up at me, and it was all I could do not to just kiss her.
There was nothing about this moment that called for a kiss.
Except we were alone, and even when I wasn’t alone with Adele…
I wanted her. But this way I felt with her was so foreign.
I felt like I was tiptoeing through a brand-new land, one where I didn’t have a map, and it was filled with curious, unknown details.
Specifically—I didn’t know how to flirt anymore. Not with Adele. Not when we were alone.
I cleared my throat and tipped my head to the side and startled the hell out of myself when I said, “I want to kiss you.”
Her mouth dropped open. “Huh?”