Sylvia
OVER TWO YEARS Later…
I couldn’t believe I had to co-parent with a fuck nigga. The very sight of his ass made me sick to my fucking stomach and I might have loved my kids but I hated they had a genetic connection to him. Their being good kids meant my genes were definitely doing the heavy lifting.
Thank God.
“You looking good, Sylvie.” Dave had the nerve to lick his lips as he came up the porch like that shit was going to entice me into giving a fuck about him or what his dick was doing.
“I’ve always looked good, Dave, and I’ve told you that we don’t need to make small talk when we exchange the kids. There are their bags they’ll be outside in a second.”
I pointed to the bags on the floor of the porch before glaring back at his stupid face.
I wasn’t even upset about his cheating, which was crazy to say.
I was angrier that he’d wasted my time. I thought things between us had been good.
More good and great times than bad but it was clear that my so called husband was only able to be so agreeable to me because he was out living the single life whenever he could get it in.
In the divorce so much had come out about his extracurricular activities and the different women he’d been sleeping with.
He’d lived a double life when I could’ve been gone somewhere living my best life alone.
Instead, I’d held him down while he’d basically played at being an adult.
My great aunt had given me the deed to the house we lived in and I had land out in the country we’d always talked about building our dream house on.
But the house would only happen if I financed it because in two decades Dave made no effort to move past where we currently were.
I was annoyed with myself for putting up with years of broken promises.
It was easy to see how apathy had sunk in within those last few years.
That’s when the good times turned to nothing at all.
“You still ain’t over me, Sylvie?”
I glanced up and realized he’d moved closer to me which had me taking a step back.
I damn near heaved at hearing his words because I was used to him saying this shit.
Dave thought I was sitting around pining for him simply because I hadn’t gotten into another relationship.
It had nothing to do with wanting him but with being thoroughly disgusted with every man I’d come across.
The one I’d let some of my guard down for disappeared into thin air.
Additionally, I’d had more issues than I cared to remember with my babies once we split up.
They’d begun to act out and within two months I’d put them into therapy in order to ensure they could navigate the transition.
Dave didn’t make it any easier since he wasn’t willing to attend sessions or do any of the work necessary. Which only made me hate him more.
“We are not friends, call me Sylvia, nigga. And it’s not that I’m not over you, you just disgust me.
As do all men at this time.” I shrugged at him wishing he would leave me the hell alone.
It was far too hot outside to be talking to this nigga I didn’t even like.
I could see him watching my movements, taking in my frame with too much appreciation.
I’d always been fit but working out was how I’d gotten back to myself after he got put out.
It allowed me to work out my frustrations and punch away my fury so I didn’t play roulette with my freedom.
“Two years and you still ain’t forgiven me?
We been divorced for over a year we should be able to co-parent without there being a problem.
Besides, are you saying you into bitches now?
” His eyes perked up like he was going to be invited to a sexscapade between me and my imaginary girlfriend.
It was wild to see how terrible of a liar he was from this side.
Once I removed those rose-colored glasses I had to wonder if I was just as stupid as he was.
“You don’t have the power to make me change my sexuality. I’m unfortunately still attracted to men. And no, there isn’t a problem. I let you have the kids whenever you want even though that shit is few and far between. It’s not my fault your girl is intimidated despite me not wanting you at all.”
Dave had fucked up and gotten his side bitch, Bianca, pregnant not too long after I’d found out about their affair.
For some reason she felt as though this was going to be her triumph but he’d been taking her through hell the same way he’d done me.
She had attempted to flaunt her pregnancy and then her baby in my face and I didn’t give a damn.
Hell, I’d sent the kids to the shower so they could help celebrate their sibling.
There wasn’t anything about him having a kid with someone else that bothered me.
My feelings were completely gone for him.
“She just knows that I have feelings for you.” He tried to lower his eyes at me and look…contrite? Remorseful? Fuck if I knew but he was failing at it miserably.
“That’s too bad for the both of you and your newest kid. A child should have two parents that give a fuck about them. Not two who are constantly battling with one another over his father’s wandering dick.”
“Your mind on my dick, Syl?” That sly grin was back on his face and I was back to wondering where the hell my kids were and why it was taking so long.
I rubbed my eyes wishing my babies would hurry the fuck up so I didn’t have to deal with this man. The day my son learned how to drive was the day I wouldn’t have to worry about this man stepping foot on my property again.
“You honestly don’t get it do you? I don’t have any feelings for you anymore.
I don’t like you as a person. The only reason you’re still in my orbit is because of the kids and I am counting down the days until I don’t have to do anything with you any longer.
Selene is ten so I only have eight more years to freedom. ”
“Damn, it’s like that?” I had to narrow my eyes at him because he looked genuinely confused at my lack of fucks to give toward him.
“Yeah, straight like that.”
He scoffed and ran his hands over his waves. It was the one move he always did when he was frustrated. “You doing too much—”
“You doing a whole lot of talking to not even like this bitch, Dave!”
I rolled my eyes as the stupid bird he’d knocked up rolled down her window to yell out of it.
She thought that I would feel some type of way about her calling me a bitch but I didn’t.
She was angry and didn’t want to take it out on the person that had caused her pain.
She needed him to save face in our town so I was naturally the bad guy.
Despite the fact that I hated this nigga’s guts.
After they’d gotten fired from Beacon Grove elementary, the only job she could find was to go and work at a daycare.
Plenty of people didn’t like her morals but my former in-laws vouched for her with the owner.
I was sure they were getting over on her, because she was viewed as a bad risk.
People in Beacon Grove looked at her as an outsider and being one who’d been a party in adultery meant very few people fucked with her.
I hated it for her because Dave was just as at fault but he had patriarchy and being a lifelong resident benefiting him.
Since Dave wasn’t getting paid nearly as much as he had when he was working for the school district, I hoped she got free childcare out of the deal.
Dave turned to her and I took my time to throw her a smile and a wave.
“I told you about disrespecting her. All that shit ain’t necessary.
” I knew his words had more to do with trying to save face in front of me now than any type of actual respect so I didn’t feed into it.
I heard a door opening and knew Ms. Geraldine got tired of straining herself so she just came outside to be nosy.
I glanced her way and sure ‘nough she was sipping on some sweet tea and got comfortable on her front porch.
I nodded her my acknowledgement and she threw her hand up giddy to get the dirt before anyone else.
“You’re smiling in your ex’s face like me and your baby aren’t sitting here in the car waiting on you!” She hung further out of the car window oblivious to how her actions were making her baby holler out in the back seat. Dave clearly heard his daughter crying by the frown on his face.
“Man, chill out!”
Bianca looked ready to step out of the car and confront both of us and I could only sigh. I swore I would never let her or Dave bring me down again. But if he couldn’t control her we would be locked in for round two.
Thankfully, the kids opened the door with their book bags on their backs.
They were supposedly road tripping to the amusement park with their dad, since this was one of his weeks to have them during the summer.
Our custody arrangement was supposed to be 50/50 but I was lucky if Dave got them every other weekend.
I didn’t complain because I wasn’t keen on Bianca hovering over my children.
They’d told me on more than one occasion that she’d told them they could call her mom or stepmom but I was thankful that Dave had gotten her ass together before I had to.
She must’ve forgotten the way I’d lumped her head up two years ago, but she could get a repeat fucking with my babies.
“Bye, mama! We’ll text you some pictures.”
My son, who was the oldest, Dorian leaned down slightly to give me a hug. At fourteen he was slightly taller than I was and he was too happy about the height he had coming in.
I hugged him back as my daughter’s arms went around my waist. At ten she was as tall as my shoulder and I was sure she would be looking me in the eyes before she was a teenager.