Chapter 16 #2
Every time before this, she had known the answer was no.
She had seen the disappointment on the faces of many women hoping they could change her mind and help her see the light, that they’d be the one.
What they didn’t get was there was no one.
This was all there was, all she could be.
But she’d done a lot of things over the past weeks she never would have done in a million years.
Like throwing weddings, multiple weddings, seeing the ballet, and sitting across from this woman on what many might call a second date.
And as Cassie’s brown eyes penetrated her walls, she couldn’t help but wonder if her answer was changing.
“What can I get you ladies?” The young man in a black half-apron held his notepad at the ready, exhibiting the magical skill of every waitperson on the planet to interrupt the conversation at the most inopportune moment.
Though Drea was grateful for this particular save, not having the words for what seemed like the billionth time where Cassie was concerned, her short-lived victory lost its luster as she watched Cassie’s face dim with defeat.
Another nonanswer, another evaded moment.
She was the master of them. And though she had seen that same reaction many times before, this was the first time it truly bothered her.
They continued the dance through the rest of dinner, toeing the edge of vulnerability before retreating once again.
She wanted to know Cassie, to understand her, more than anyone in a very long time.
And she couldn’t explain it to herself or anyone else.
Why this woman? Why now? Why did she linger in Drea’s mind late at night and flit in and out throughout the day?
Did it matter, though? Couldn’t this be enough?
To enjoy her company and feel this way without risking anything, avoiding the inevitable disappointment altogether.
Maybe they could forge a different path .
. . all of the good and none of the bad. Was that possible?
As they finished dinner and walked outside, thunder rumbled in the distance, and she sensed a growing turmoil in Cassie. They walked halfway down the block in silence before she stopped under the light of a nearby awning. “Hey, what is it? What’s going on?”
Cassie blew out a breath. “I’m so confused right now.”
“Why?” She knew the answer, but she had no idea how to navigate this for the first time in her life.
Cassie closed her eyes. “God.” She bit her lip and stared down the empty street for a moment.
“I feel so stupid saying this, but . . . us. This thing.” She gestured between them and at the air around them.
“I know you’re the player of all players, and I’m probably going to ruin everything by saying this, but am I crazy? ”
Drea’s lips parted but no words came. Her throat was dry, her heart pounded in her chest so loud she could hear it, and all she could do was stare at this woman who had eclipsed everything in her life somehow, slowly but surely.
She felt things for Cassie she hadn’t ever felt before, and it scared the hell out of her.
A crack of lightning struck and a soft parade of raindrops began to fall.
“I thought you hated me, then pitied me, then maybe saw me as a friend,” Cassie said.
She put her hands on her hips and stepped back, staring at the ground as she kicked at the concrete.
“And I was fine with that,” she muttered at the ground.
“But this,” she gestured in the direction of the theater and then the restaurant, her voice tiny as she continued, “it means something to me.” There was so much hope and pain in that last word.
She stared at Drea, pleading eyes turning to something darker.
“I mean, is this what you do? Make women fall for you and then fuck with them? Because I feel like there should be a mob of lesbians with pitchforks following you wherever you go.”
Drea would have laughed if she wasn’t paralyzed by heartache and fear.
With all the women before, she had flirted and charmed her way to a fun night.
It was mutual and they knew what they were signing up for.
And if they had illusions of other things, she charmed them out of those too.
But she felt helpless with Cassie, all of her charm useless and empty when it actually mattered, with someone who mattered.
The rain fell harder, sheets of white dropping from the awning behind Cassie like snow. “Drea, what are you doing?” The anger had left her eyes. Only raw, honest emotion remained.
The simple question cut through her—through her excuses, her walls, her fear, all the years avoiding anything that would lead to a moment like this.
And as she watched the emotion in Cassie’s eyes, the beautiful specks of gold amidst the brown, a universe in a microcosm, everything seemed to fall away.
It all seemed so clear to her now. No hesitation gripped her, only resolve.
She closed the gap between them. “What I should have done the other night.”
As Cassie’s eyes began to search hers, Drea took her in her arms, pulling her close as she kissed her so deeply that Cassie no longer had to ask any more questions. She would feel everything she needed to know.
Cassie wouldn’t have been able to describe the short blocks to Drea’s apartment or, once inside, how exactly they moved through it.
It was all a blur as they bumped into walls and tables, pausing at every surface to ravish each other, a flurry of hands and mouths battling to reach deeper.
When she felt the press of the kitchen counter behind her, she shifted her focus to the wet clothes clinging to Drea’s body, making her even sexier than usual.
She yanked Drea’s coat off her shoulders and Drea wriggled out of it as it dropped to the floor.
Then she slid the charcoal gray suit jacket off to reveal a navy-blue dress shirt glued to her lithe frame.
Her eyes dropped to the open buttons along her chest and the sultry expanse of silky olive skin.
She paused at the sight, but Drea smashed her mouth to hers, the tempo unyielding.
Drea made quick work of undoing the buttons down Cassie’s coat and tossing it aside.
Cassie felt her belt give way, quickly followed by the clasp at the back of her neck before Drea raised her dress up, pausing briefly for Cassie to raise her arms as she lifted it over her head.
Drea stilled for a moment, her eyes raking over Cassie’s body, lingering on her bright purple lingerie as a smile played on her lips.
She took Cassie’s hand and sat her on the arm of the sofa, kissing her as she knelt to the ground and started untying her laces and . . . kept untying her laces.
Cassie’s giggle broke their kiss.
Drea looked down at the boots and laughed. “They’re not exactly easy access are they?” She yanked at a few more laces and slid the first boot off, quickly followed by the second.
Cassie stood with her, needing to feel her mouth again.
She took Drea’s mouth in hers, lingering in the sweet deliciousness before kissing down her neck as she unbuttoned the soaked shirt, sliding it off to reveal the softest, sexiest skin she had ever felt.
Drea wrapped her arms around her, pulling her close, as Cassie luxuriated in the sensation of their skin commingling.
She had imagined what this might feel like, but nothing came close to the reality.
Drea kissed along her shoulder and up her neck, igniting butterflies in Cassie’s stomach; then she leaned back, lust swirling in her rich blue eyes. She ran her hand through Cassie’s hair, pushing the wet strands out of her eye.
“You’re so beautiful,” Drea whispered.
Cassie stared deep into those eyes that had gripped her for so long. “So are you.”
Drea ran her thumb along Cassie’s bottom lip, and Cassie watched as her eyes grew darker.
In a heartbeat, their mouths crashed together once more, their bodies following in a frenzy, as they whirled their way to the bed, bras tossed aside in the torrent.
Drea laid her gently on the bed, and as she lowered her body, Cassie reveled in the magnificent weight of her, the melding of their bodies as one.
Drea took her time kissing up to her ear, the tickle of her breath sending further jolts of arousal through Cassie’s body.
She kissed her way down Cassie’s neck and chest before taking her nipple in her mouth, the glorious ache ripping a gasp from Cassie’s lips.
Cassie watched Drea paint a masterpiece across her skin, tangling her fingers in Drea’s wild curls as she explored Cassie’s body and brought her to the brink, and when she didn’t think she could wait any longer, Drea moved her tongue lower, a visceral front-row seat to a repertoire of moves that took Cassie to the precipice and over, again and again, until she lay breathless and depleted, thoroughly consumed by the woman with the sexy grin climbing up beside her with an ocean of blue in those sparkling eyes.
“Hi,” Drea’s grin broke wide as she propped herself on her elbow.
Cassie shook her head and laughed. “Hello. You, um, definitely have some skills down there.”
Drea trailed her finger along Cassie’s chest as she held her gaze, and Cassie was struck by the enormity of her beauty. “Well, thank you.” The southern drawl dripping from her words took the sexiness factor to another ridiculous level.
Cassie rolled onto her side, resting her cheek against her wrist, so she could see Drea more fully. The sight of Drea’s breasts quickly extinguished any exhaustion she felt, and as her eyes dropped lower, she frowned at the sight of Drea’s pants.
“What’s wrong?” Drea asked.