Chapter 17 Jamison
Jamison
“Try it now!” I call to Sean from behind the hood of a silver Honda Civic. The engine revs to life. I slam the hood shut and hold out my open palm waiting for Sean to exit the car. With a heavy sigh, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a twenty, slapping it begrudgingly into my hand.
Sometimes, when the guys and I are bored, we make bets on different things at the garage.
What color car will pull in next? What type of person will be driving it?
How many times will Zeke fall asleep at his desk?
Today, I bet Sean I could replace Mrs. Reed’s alternator in under an hour.
Fifty-seven minutes later, I’m twenty bucks richer.
The schedule has been light today. A dead battery here, a flat tire there, and then Mrs. Reed earning me a little extra cash. It’s a nice problem to have after working so much overtime this week, but it also means more downtime to think about Claire.
The last forty-eight hours have been agonizing.
To go from finally being with her to complete radio silence is a new form of torture, even for me.
For the first time, maybe ever, I felt okay slightly opening up to a woman.
That combined with the magic that was that fucking kiss, turned my world completely upside down.
All I have thought about the last two days is her.
Like nicotine, when she hit, adrenaline coursed through my veins.
But now, the withdrawal from it has left me on edge.
Unsteady. Restless, until I can next satisfy the urge.
The ease of conversation, the lack of judgment, the way she knew exactly what to say.
Her hand in my hair, her body against mine, her tongue brushing against my own.
I thought that kiss would get her out of my system.
A quick high and then I’d fall back down to Earth, fulfilled.
Satisfied. But it’s only worse. She’s the most dangerous kind of drug.
I avoid this type of situation on purpose.
How do I let myself get attached to someone who can just bring me pain?
Who can leave? Who deserves more than me in the first place?
I walk through the bay doors for some fresh air.
Leaning against the concrete wall, I slide a cigarette into place.
I close my eyes still thinking of her. Sean returns from pulling the car around back and instantly leans against the wall next to me.
Unfortunately for me, he also sees the benefit of a slower day and for him, it's that this is the first free moment he’s gotten to confront me about Friday.
“So, what the fuck was up with Friday night?”
“Dude, don’t start. That idiot in the jersey had it coming. If you had heard—”
“Not with that guy!" he cuts me off. "I don’t care about the bar. You say he had it coming, he had it coming. I’m talking about the lady!”
I shake my head now confused. “What?”
“The girl you were with! At Enzo’s? Come on, don’t hold back on me.”
I kick off the wall and face him completely. “How the hell did you find out about that?”
“Mikey texted Ro and told him you were havin’ late-night snackies with a total babe, and Ro told me. Because he's a good friend.”
I roll my eyes. “You guys seriously have got to get a life. And I didn’t tell you because…" I pause, looking off to the side. "Because there’s nothing to tell.”
Sean brings his palm to his forehead. “Okay, I have known you for five years—”
“Three years.”
“Okay, three years. But I’ve been your best friend—”
“Ronan’s my best friend.”
“Fine. You have been my best friend for three years. In those three years, you have talked about a woman exactly zero times. And now, all of a sudden, you just bring this girl to Enzo’s, and your residence I may add, and there’s nothing to tell?”
I consider all of the ways that I could respond to that, but in keeping with my newest trend, I try the truth. “The guy selling the Maverick, it’s his daughter. We met when I returned the car. Ran into each other at Enzo’s once before and then again on Friday. We hung out. That’s all.”
“Oh, you just hung out? After closing. With a good-looking girl. Whose dad owns the car of your dreams? While eating the world’s best pi—”
This time, it’s me who does the interrupting.
“Yes, Sean. We just hung out. Now can we drop it?” I realize it’s my anxiety causing me to snap.
I take a long drag of my cigarette to consider everything.
Talking about this makes it so much more real.
What if she’s already forgotten about the whole thing?
See, this is why I don’t do this. There’s now something at stake.
No, keeping our time tucked away in my memory is its safest place for now. There’s a scary thought.
“Well did you at least get her number?”
Jesus, even he thinks of it. Again, I get restless. Dropping my smoke, I move my hands to my hips, hang my head, and exhale a defeated sigh.
“No. I didn’t,” I say angrily, and as I do, I realize I’m mad at myself, not him. Dialing it back, I lower my voice. “Can we just leave it alone?” I drop my hands and take my first step, heading back inside.
“Hey, Jay,” I stop as Sean makes a poor excuse for whispering. “If it doesn’t work out with the pizza girl…" he pauses, pointing behind me. “Maybe you can shoot your shot with her.”