Chapter 18
Iwas telling the truth when I told Elena I liked taking care of her.
It was a completely new experience for me but one I wouldn’t mind repeating.
Without her having to get sick of course.
I’d spent so many years with people watching out for me.
First my mom and dad while I struggled my way through school, and then later by a few exceptional professors who overlooked my inability to stick to a timeline and prioritize tasks, choosing to focus on my way of thinking instead of the deficits.
It took years for me to learn the skills that let me work with my brain’s natural strengths and figure out how to accommodate the perceived weaknesses.
I still relied on Anna to make sure my home worked the way I needed it to and that I had clean clothes to wear.
Even Elena had gone out of her way to fill in some of the gaps for me.
But sick Elena needed me to step up. I had to take care of her because she depended on me.
It was heady stuff and something I was determined to be good at.
Which meant, no matter what my traitorous body thought, we were not doing anything sexual. Not this time.
Mark said I needed to keep her from getting dehydrated, so that’s where I’d start. Leaving her with the remnants of her lukewarm Gatorade, I picked up the tray and headed to the kitchen to replenish supplies.
It had been a while since she’d thrown up, which I hoped meant the worst of it was over.
She’d made a dent in her chicken noodle soup.
Maybe she was up for something more solid.
I dropped four pieces of bread in the toaster and went to the refrigerator for butter and strawberry jam.
While I was there, I grabbed the bottle of ginger ale and filled two tall glasses with crushed ice.
My mom gave me ginger ale and toast when I’d gotten sick as a kid.
I tried to remember if there was anything else special about it.
The toast popped, and I fixed them the way I remembered my mom doing it.
Not too much butter and a thin smear of jam.
Since I wasn’t the sick one, I added a thicker layer of jam to my pieces.
Placing the icy glasses of ginger ale and plates of toast on the tray, I glanced around to see if I was missing anything.
Elena’s phone sat next to her purse on the table by the door.
She’d only been with me for about twenty-four hours, but I imagined someone was missing her.
Friends or work. Maybe someone else. We’d never talked about being exclusive.
I knew she dated other people. I hadn’t been looking for a relationship, and she hadn’t been looking for a relationship with someone like me.
She’d want someone who could take her out and show her off.
Someone who liked being out with people.
Not someone who lost themselves in bits of code.
None of that mattered to me. Until now.
If I took her the phone, it would bring the rest of the world into the bedroom space that had become just ours. If I didn’t take it to her, she might get up and look for it herself, which would literally take her out of the bedroom.
Not certain which was the better choice and sure I didn’t like either, I dropped the phone on the tray and headed back to my room and the woman waiting in my bed.
She’d propped herself up on pillows and was scrolling through the options on the TV. I hoped that meant she wasn’t in a hurry to leave. She seemed well enough to be on her own, but I liked having her here with me. Laughing and watching movies. Trusting me enough to fall asleep in my arms.
“What do you want to watch next?” I set the tray on the duvet and crawled onto my side of the bed.
I was perfectly comfortable in nothing but my boxers, but I could tell by the way she huddled under the covers, she was cold. I jumped up and went to my dresser, digging around until I found my MIT sweatshirt. A scrap of black fabric caught my eye, and I grinned.
Hooking my finger in the lace, I held the panties I’d stolen from her out like a trophy and watched her eyes go wide. I must have mixed them in with my things. If Anna wondered how women’s underwear ended up in my laundry, she hadn’t asked.
I tugged the covers off Elena’s legs and held the panties so she could slip her feet through the openings. Hurrying when I desperately wanted to take my time, I slid the lace up her legs and over her hips, tucking her back under the covers before she had a chance to shiver.
“Arms up,” I said, meeting her gaze and letting some of the heat I felt show. There was no way in hell I’d push her when she was sick, but I was never going to stop wanting Elena.
I held out the soft cotton sweatshirt, and she complied, pulling her hair free from the material settled around her.
Airdrying it post-shower and then rolling around in the bed turned it into a disheveled halo of soft brown waves.
Christ, she was so damn beautiful it made my chest hurt.
I liked her any way she came, but this Elena, relaxed and swallowed by my college sweatshirt, might be my favorite one.
She picked up a piece of the toast and took a tentative bite, her eyes lighting when the jam hit her tongue. I picked up my own piece and finished it in just a couple of bites.
“It tastes so good,” she said, taking another, bigger bite this time.
“I’m glad you’re getting your appetite back.” I picked up my second piece. “Make sure you keep drinking. Mark said that was important.”
“Is he a real doctor? I’m fuzzy on the details, but he seemed real.” She took a sip of her ginger ale, another one, and a smile spread across her gorgeous face.
Put together with all the makeup and polish, she was stunning. This fresh-faced no makeup version stole my breath. The pale, slightly green look had been replaced by a delicate flush I hoped wasn’t a fever.
“He is. He owed me a favor.” Needing to be certain, I held my wrist to her forehead, grateful she was warm, not hot.
“You have to let me pay you back. I’ve made myself a complete imposition.” She pushed the plate with the remaining piece of toast in my direction.
“Don’t be silly. Mark’s a friend and you’re not an imposition.” I met her gaze before snagging her abandoned toast. “I’m sorry you got sick. And I still want to play with the things you brought.”
I got an image of Elena with the delicate chains clamped to her nipples, bent over, waiting for me to slide the metal plug into her ass. I’d fuck her while she wore it, tugging on the chains while I buried myself in her tight, wet heat. Yeah, I still wanted to play.
“But I like spending time with you.”
She tipped her head, looking uncharacteristically shy, and then she smiled at me. It was as if the world lit up.
“I like spending time with you too,” she said.
I polished off the toast so I could avoid doing something crazy, like asking her if she wanted to play girlfriend.
“You didn’t answer my question. What do you want to watch next?” I repeated when she looked at me, confused.
“I’ve already taken up so much of your time. Don’t you have to work?” She glanced at her phone.
I thought this was the moment she’d start to pull away, but she didn’t pick it up.
“I finished what I had to do this morning while you slept. I’m taking the rest of the day off.” I picked up the tray and set it on the floor beside the bed. Leaning back against the pillows, I opened my arms for her and waited.
It took two very long seconds for her to decide and snuggle in against me.
“I picked last time. You choose this one,” she said, resting her cheek on my chest.
“How do you feel about alternative farming practices that trap carbon and reduce greenhouse gas emissions? There are also baby pigs and some chickens.”
“I feel like that’s a very good idea.”
I tucked her head under my chin and hit play on the farming documentary I’d been meaning to watch since I read an article on healthy soil being able to sequester and hold carbon from the air.
My kind of computing used a fuckton of energy, often from some not so clean sources.
Ignoring the inherent pitfalls, AI could do some amazing things, like predict diseases before they formed and save lives.
None of which would matter if we didn’t have a planet to live on.
By the time the snails laid waste to the fruit trees and the ducks laid waste to them, Elena’s soft snoring rumbled against my skin. I thought about reaching for my phone to record the sound so I’d have proof, but that would mean letting her go, and I had no intention of doing that.
When Elena woke again, the afternoon light was sliding into evening. The movie finished an hour earlier, and I’d spent the time looking up alternative farming practices on my phone. That rabbit hole led to sustainable architecture, which led to using mushrooms as building materials.
“What time is it?” She peeled her face off my chest, and I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from making a smart-ass comment about the imprint my hair made on her face.
“After four.” As soon as she sat up, I stretched my arm, grateful when the blood flow returned.
I could have eased it out from underneath her earlier, but I didn’t want to risk waking her. Sleep seemed to be the best medicine. Every time she woke up, she seemed to feel a little bit better.
“I’ve taken up your whole day.” She watched me as if she expected me to agree. “I’m feeling so much better. I should probably go home.”
“Not yet.” It shocked the hell out of me. Social interactions usually wore me out fast. I’d never thought about sharing my space with anyone before, but I liked having Elena in my bed. I didn’t want her to leave and despite her words, she didn’t seem in a hurry to go. “Are you hungry?”
She tipped her head, considering. “Yes, very.”
“I can fix that.” I still had the sub I’d ordered for her but that felt like too big a stretch to start. “We should still probably go slow. What about ramen?”
“That sounds perfect, but let me get it this time. You’ve done more than enough.” She swung her legs over the side of the bed.
“Don’t be silly. I order so much from them, I’ve got an account.” I watched to make sure she was steady on her feet before reaching for my phone. “Tonkatsu ramen okay, or do you want to look at the menu?”
“That’s the pork one, right? That would be great.” She headed to the bathroom, closing the door behind her.
I placed the order then looked around the room.
I kept my spaces deliberately sparse with just the things I needed to function.
It meant even when I forgot to pay attention, the clutter couldn’t get too out of control.
In the bedroom that meant my TV, bed, dresser, and nightstands currently holding an old Gatorade bottle and our glasses leaving wet rings of condensation on the dark wood tops.
I set the empty glasses on the tray to take to the kitchen and swiped at the rings with the paper towel tucked under Elena’s empty plate.
Left on my own, the tray would sit beside the bed until Anna collected it or it grew legs and walked to the kitchen.
I didn’t think I was too good to clean up after myself.
I just didn’t think about it at all. Once I finished using something, I had to force myself to remember to put it back where it belonged.
It was another thing that changed with having Elena in my space.
I looked at things the way she’d see them and knew the clutter would bother her.
Her phone still sat on the tray. When I picked it up to set it on the nightstand, it flashed with an incoming text.
J
In Hong Kong researching a new place. I saw this and thought of you. Beautiful, vibrant, breathtaking. I’d love to show it to you sometime.
The screen filled with an image of the city skyline that looked like it had been taken from the top-floor lounge of a busy skyscraper.
I dropped the phone on the bed as if it stung me.
Ignoring the questions I wasn’t about to ask—like who the fuck was J, and what else he planned to show Elena—I grabbed the tray and headed for the kitchen.