Chapter 20
THE END OF THE ROAD
AS PREDICTED, IT HAD TAKEN BELIAL OVER AN HOUR TO walk home from the club. His new neighborhood was ritzy and full of mansions, and as a result, the streets were dead silent, save for the occasional car passing by. It was oddly calming.
When he got home, he ditched his clothes on the bedroom floor and stood under the scalding spray of his shower for over half an hour before sprawling out on his enormous bed.
The house was so quiet he could hear the ringing in his ears.
It was late, well after two in the morning. The room was dark. But he wasn’t even close to sleeping.
Instead, he lay on his back and stared at the ceiling. He couldn’t get the terror in Skye’s eyes out of his head. Eyes open or shut, the sight of her backing away from him was burned into his retinas like he’d been staring at a too-bright light.
His phone rang on the nightstand. He would normally never answer a call this late, but he had a feeling he knew who it was.
“Bel, are you okay?” Eva asked immediately when he picked up. “What happened?”
“Don’t ask me if I’m okay,” he replied. “Ask your friend.”
“What happened?”
“I scared the shit out of her.” He spoke through gritted teeth. “She took off running like the hounds of Hell were after her.”
Eva cursed.
“Have you spoken to her?” he asked. “Did she make it home?”
“I talked to her.”
He waited for more. The silence was suspiciously weighted. “And?”
“And …” Eva took a breath. “You’re right. You scared the shit out of her.”
“What did she say?”
“Um … well, I don’t know exactly what happened, because she couldn’t really explain the supernatural shit. So she kinda translated it into thinking you’re a big, terrifying red flag.”
Bel winced. “She’s not wrong.”
“What exactly happened?”
“A car almost hit her. Some drunk idiot running the red light. I tried to shove her out of the way, but I pushed her too hard and she went flying.”
“Oh, damn,” Eva said.
“That’s not all.”
“Uh-oh.”
“The car hit me instead. I got … pissed. Lost my temper a little. Smashed the hood in.”
“With what?”
“My fists.”
“Oh my god.”
“Bunch of humans saw me.”
“Shit. Was there fire?”
“No. But it was close.”
“Shit.” Eva was personally acquainted with the phases of Bel’s temper tantrums. First, his eyes flickered with hellfire, then he started to gain height. The air around him would waver with heat waves, and then he’d burst into flames.
But that was only the beginning.
“You got hit by a car though?” Eva asked. “Are you okay?”
“The car was in worse shape than I was.”
“Well, that’s kinda badass.”
He snorted. “Ask Skye how badass it was.”
“She thinks you have like, next-level anger issues.”
“Again, she’s not wrong.”
“And … she’s inexplicably, irrationally terrified of you.”
“What?”
“Yeah, I had to help her through a near panic attack just from talking about you. I think the supernatural stuff made her instincts go haywire. She doesn’t even understand why she’s so scared.”
“Fuck.” He really had traumatized her. This was exactly why Eva hadn’t wanted him hanging around her. Maybe he ought to foot the bill for all the therapy Skye would need to cure her sudden crippling fear of tall blond men. “Eva, I—Shit.”
“It’s fine, Bel. Actually, I wanted to say I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to glare at you from across the club like this was some stupid high-school drama. I was just worried—”
“You were looking out for your friend. There’s nothing to be sorry for.”
“I know, but I don’t want you to think it’s because of you. I mean, it is kinda, but you’re a great guy, and—”
“It’s fine. And please never call me a ‘great guy’ again.”
She snorted. “My apologies. What I mean to say is that it has nothing to do with you personally. I just don’t want Skye to get hurt. She’s human, and she doesn’t have the Sight. I just don’t want her to get caught up in all this.”
“Eva. I get it.”
She sighed. “Did you have fun at Bootleg at least? It was great to have you out with us again.”
“Yeah, I did.” He dragged a hand through his hair and then dropped it back onto the bed. “But I think it’s safest if I stay away from humans for a while.”
“You live on Earth, Bel. Humans are kinda par for the course.”
“I know.”
But his slip-ups were piling up. First Meph’s fingers, now this idiotic display. How long until he lost it and did something really terrible? But he couldn’t force himself to stay at home all the time and expect not to lose his mind either. He didn’t know what to do.
That was the problem with his celibacy pact. Sex had always been an outlet for his temper. When he’d stopped, he’d cut himself off from one of his primary forms of release without offering an alternative.
Naiamah was right, that bitch. Repression never works. Knowing she had called that from the get-go, back when he’d been all optimistic about his new life plan, pissed him off. Just once, he’d wanted to do something different.
He’d wanted to be someone different.
“Look,” Eva said, “maybe I could talk to Skye, explain to her that—”
“No. You were right before. She’s safest far away from all of us. If it’ll help her feel better, you can tell her I said I’m sorry for losing my shit, but that’s as far as I’ll go.”
She blew out a breath. “Fine. I hate this though. It would be nice for you to have some company, you know? You’re a catch, Bel. What woman doesn’t want to sit and drink fancy wine while you cook her a five-course meal? That’s the dream.”
He grunted. It was a nice fantasy. But he was pretty sure it wasn’t “the dream” to date a flaming rageaholic who blew up every time someone looked at him sideways.
He wasn’t about to make some poor human risk her life every second she was around him in case he tried to push her out of the path of a moving car and ended up launching her halfway down the block.
And that wasn’t even touching on why he hadn’t started having sex again after reaching his six-month goal. He would rather die than lose control and flambé someone in bed. Just knowing that he had to worry about that was enough to kill his desire.
“I should go, Eva.”
“Yeah, me too. It’s so late, I feel like my eyes are bleeding.”
“Thanks for inviting me tonight.”
“Aw, of course. It’s never as fun without you there. We all miss you when you’re not around.”
“You’re starting to sound like your mother, you know.”
“She wants you to come over for dinner again.”
“Of course she does.”
“Night, Bel.”
“Night.” He hung up. And then, because he was feeling sorry for himself, he chucked his phone across the room. It was vaguely satisfying to see it smack the wall.
Then he groaned. If he’d dented the drywall of his fancy new house, he was going to punch himself. He wouldn’t mind if his phone broke though. Then he wouldn’t have to endure any more awkward conversations.