Chapter 26 #2
Satisfaction filled Suyin. Finally, finally … a confession. But she was also slightly concerned. Iris wasn’t taking this well at all.
“I just got my life together!” she cried.
“I just barely learned how to take care of myself! Two years ago, I could hardly remember to eat because I was so obsessed with revenge and so fucking angry all the time!” She was half in tears.
“I love Meph, I love him to death, but I cannot be pregnant right now! I’d need like ten more years to even consider—”
“Iris!” Suyin figured it was time to intervene. “Iris, calm down. You’re not pregnant.”
“You can’t know that. I’ve been having unprotected sex. This morning! I did it this morning! Oh my god—”
“Iris! Calm down. According to my father’s grimoire, Cambion conception involves complex magic for it to be possible. It’s extremely difficult.”
“You’re … sure?”
“Yes. It can’t happen by accident. There’s no way. If you don’t want to get pregnant, you won’t.”
Iris took two wobbly steps back to the table and dropped into the chair. “Oh, thank god. Thank the lord on high and all the dickish angels.” She sat up and jabbed a finger in Suyin’s direction. “You scared the living hell out of me! Don’t do that!”
Suyin couldn’t help but smirk. “So, you’re not really into the idea of motherhood, huh?”
“Fuck no. Babies scare me.” Iris laughed. “Not saying I’d never want them, because things change, but honestly, knowing Meph couldn’t was a relief because then it wasn’t my choice, and I’d never have to—”
She broke off suddenly and stared at Suyin, evidently just realizing what she’d admitted to.
“Relax,” Suyin said, rolling her eyes. “I already knew.”
“W-what?”
“I know about your demon boyfriend.”
“How!”
“Seriously? How could I not? You’re a terrible liar, and what kinda name is ‘Meph’ anyway?”
Iris groaned and buried her face in her hands. “I told them they needed fake names, but they refused to listen. It was all some big joke to them, picking out stupid names and then making fun of each other instead of using them. They’re idiots, the lot of them.”
“How many demons are in Montreal right now, Iris?”
Iris lifted her head and winced. “Five.”
“All Meph’s brothers?”
She nodded weakly.
“And Lily’s boyfriend, Mist, is one of them?”
Another nod. “You can’t tell anyone, Suyin. They’re not evil. I know it sounds crazy, but you have to believe me. They just want to live on Earth and be left alone. They’re not even breaking the rules anymore. They got permission since Raum’s—”
“I’m not going to tell anyone, and I already know they’re not evil.”
“You do?” Iris looked incredulous.
“Wasn’t I just explaining to you how they evolve souls?”
Her eyes narrowed. “Why aren’t you freaking out?
I was the world’s biggest demon hater. You went along with all my harebrained revenge schemes.
You listened to me rant for hours about the evilness of demons and how they should all be exterminated.
And now you’re just accepting that I’m in love with one and we’re all besties? ”
Suyin laughed. Because yeah, she got why Iris was confused. It sounded ridiculous even to her. And what she was about to say was even more ridiculous.
“I’m not surprised because I kinda made friends with my own demon.”
“The one that took you to Hell?” Iris dragged her hands down her face. “Shit, how did we skip over that part? What happened? Who was it? How did you escape?”
“I didn’t escape. Like I said, we became friends.” Friends who fucked each other’s brains out. “He let me come back because …” She trailed off, the words sticking in her throat when she realized she’d reached the limit of what the blood vow allowed her to say.
“He let you? After he kidnapped you?”
Suyin winced. “He isn’t great at boundaries, and he doesn’t particularly give a shit either. But it’s hard not to like him anyway.” She rubbed her face. “Shit, I sound like you, making excuses for all your shitty exes.”
Iris snorted. “I used to hate myself, didn’t I?” She smacked a palm on the table. “Don’t change the subject! Who is this fabled demon with a complete lack of boundaries and respect who somehow still managed to worm his way into your cold, dead heart?”
Suyin snorted. “I can’t tell you. I swore a vow.”
“A demon took you for some nefarious purpose, and he made you swear a vow you wouldn’t tell anyone about him or why he wanted you?”
“Sounds about right.”
Iris narrowed her eyes for a moment. And then, slowly, they grew wide. And then she sat up straight and said, “Oh my god, it’s Murmur, isn’t it?”
Suyin didn’t even have to say anything. She stared at her friend in shock.
“Shit, it is!” Iris banged her hand on the table again. “That creepy, lying, backstabbing son of a bitch! No, no, you can’t be friends with him.”
Well, the cat was out of the bag. She hadn’t even tried to hint at his identity, and Iris had guessed it anyway. “Why not? How do you know him?”
“Did you know he made a bargain with Mist that he wouldn’t betray us, and then he went and did it anyway? He found some loophole in his promise and sold us out. It’s because of him that Meph and I were taken by Valefor and brought to Hell where I was nearly fucking killed.”
Suyin winced. Murmur had told her this story. From Iris’s perspective, however, it was pretty incriminating. Damn it, Murmur. Do you have to make it impossible to defend you every single time?
“Valefor was a sick fuck, and Murmur sold us out to him in five seconds, all so he could get his hands on your precious book—”
“Wait—You knew?” It was Suyin’s turn to get bug eyes. “You knew about The Book of Gamigin and didn’t tell me?”
Iris looked sheepish. “Well, I knew Murmur took it. But I didn’t know why he wanted it or what it’s about. But everyone seems to be talking about that damn book lately. First Murmur, and then Sunshine wanted it, and apparently, she was on a mission for some big head honcho in Heaven—”
“Heaven? An angel?”
“Yeah, Raum’s girlfriend, Sunshine. She’s an angel.”
Suyin groaned. “This is so fucked up. An angel? Jesus Christ.”
“Su, I’m serious. Murmur isn’t fun, sexy evil like Meph.
He’s just evil evil. All he cares about is whatever diabolical master plan he’s cooking up.
He’ll lie, cheat, steal, or kill anyone to get what he wants.
I don’t know what he told you to convince you that you’re friends, but he was lying. You can’t trust him.”
“Damn it, Iris. Why couldn’t you have told me all this a month ago? I could have used this information when I ended up in a dungeon in Hell with no idea who he was. I had to figure everything out the hard way.”
“I’m sorry. I really am. But I’m glad to hear you agree. I’m serious when I tell you not to mess with him—”
“I agree that he’s diabolical and will do anything to achieve his goals. I don’t think he’s evil though.”
“Su …” Iris’s tone was pitying, and it made Suyin’s skin crawl.
But was she doing what Iris thought she was? Making excuses for someone who didn’t deserve them because she’d blinded herself to his true nature?
If so, it would be a first. She’d always been detached, even from the people closest to her, and usually, she preferred solitude over enduring an unworthy person’s company.
She knew Murmur was morally ambiguous. She knew he’d done and would continue to do questionable things to achieve his aims, and he was never going to be sorry about it.
But she’d also seen him show empathy, and she knew he felt something for her, in whatever capacity he could.
He had a soul—therefore, he had the potential to be good.
And in her eyes, none of what he’d done was inexcusable.
That was until Iris told her that he’d almost gotten her killed. His side of the story had conveniently left out that tidbit of information.
Which in turn made Suyin wonder … how many other things had Murmur done that she didn’t know about? She’d thought she’d made a clear judgment about him based on her observations, but could she really make an informed decision without all the facts?
“Look,” she told Iris. “I’m not making excuses for Murmur. I mean, he left me in a cell for days with no food or water. But—”
“He what?”
Probably should have skimmed over that bit. “But he and I swore a binding vow. Even if I don’t trust him, I know he has no choice but to stick to that at the very least.”
“How careful were you in your negotiations? Because I’m telling you, I saw him swear on his own blood that he wouldn’t come after me, Lily, and Mist, and he wouldn’t tell anyone where we were going or send anyone after us.
And yet, somehow, Valefor showed up here saying Murmur sent him.
He found a way around that vow, and I still have no idea how. ”
Okay, that was a little freaky. “He has no reason to kill me. In fact, I can’t tell you why, but he has a vested interest in keeping me alive.”
“He could lock you up in his dungeon forever.”
She grimaced. That did sound like something he’d do.
“Su, I’m serious, this is dangerous. We should go to Meph and his brothers right away and see what they can do—”
“No.” She held up a hand. “That’ll just piss him off, and that’s the last thing I want. We have a weird kinda friendship right now, and I’m choosing to trust in it.”
Iris was shaking her head, but she knew Suyin well enough to know that when she made up her mind, there was no changing it. They were both stubborn like that.
“So … are you really half demon?”
She suddenly smiled at her friend. For the first time in her life, all her secrets had been aired. Iris knew everything there was to know about her. “Yeah. Crazy, right?”
“You’re going to have to tell me about your family and why you didn’t know. You’ve never really talked about your mother. And I need to hear every detail of the conception ritual so I can make sure to avoid it at all costs.”
Suyin chuckled. “I think you secretly want little demon babies running around. A whole brood of them, tugging on your pant legs, demanding peanut butter sandwiches—”
“Stop it!” Iris waved her hands frantically. “I’ve already got one man-child. I don’t need another.”