Chapter 14
LILIA
Our lips brushed.
I was kissing Hadrien. A gargoyle.
I wasn’t sure who’d closed that last breath of space between us—maybe both at the same time. All I cared about was that we’d finally bridged that space to touch. Yet, even on my tiptoes, I wasn’t close enough. I arched higher, holding on to his broad shoulders for support.
He tasted of the burgundy wine we’d shared at dinner. His scent stirred me—ancient, like the stones of the castle, and yet wildly masculine. It was intoxicating.
Hadrien kissed me slowly at first, but then he reached around and held the back of my neck in his large hand, tipping my head back, bringing me closer to him, and seizing control. Heat curled through me and pooled low in my belly.
I wanted more of him. So much more…
And that was the problem that woke me up.
What was I doing?
This was wrong.
Wasn’t it?
I pulled away, breaking our contact, yet remaining close enough that our breaths still mingled. He released my neck and I lowered myself to the soles of my feet. I struggled to regain my senses as I sought the reasons why kissing him was a bad idea.
Right. He’d forced me to stay here. He wasn’t just a vastly different species, but he was cursed and turned to stone at sunrise. Stone! Sweet goddess, he wasn’t even human. His size alone should intimidate me, not draw me closer like a tether.
And he was grumpy and gruff and controlling.
Yet, he could also be considerate and sweet…
No. Not helping.
Avoiding eye contact, I muttered, “That was probably a bad idea.”
A heartbeat. Then two, before he responded. “Right.”
“Just caught up in the heat of the moment,” I rationalized.
“Yes,” he agreed.
The silence stretched.
I cleared my throat. “Shall we—” I glanced at the boundary marker and along the imaginary boundary through the forest, aware of the sudden formality in my voice.
“Should we continue?” I squeezed my eyes shut.
He could interpret that as my invitation to resume the kiss—which wasn’t necessarily a terrible idea…
“With the ward,” I spat out louder than I intended to clarify my intention.
Hadrien remained quiet, during which time the tension grew. I wanted to shake an answer out of this unyielding stone.
“Channeling that kind of energy can take a toll.” His voice was low, revealing nothing. “No need to force it. We can continue tomorrow.”
“Right.” I straightened, then motioned with a halfhearted gesture toward the castle. “Perhaps we should head back then.”
He grunted, a sound I took as agreement, then headed toward the castle.
I walked beside him, the tension in the space between us pulsing with heat…
and awareness. Why was I responding this way?
I shouldn’t feel any sort of attraction to him.
He had imprisoned me. He was cursed, enormous, a different species entirely, and gruff enough to make a thorny rose bush seem cuddly in comparison.
I had every reason to feel nothing for him but wariness.
And yet…
The way he’d welcomed me into his library as if offering something precious to him.
How he’d asked me to dinner with the careful cadence of someone who wasn’t sure he remembered how.
He’d told me about his soldiers, even though I could see how it pained him.
He watched over the garden from his perch and I’d gleefully waved at a statue, which was absurd, except that it felt natural.
The problem wasn’t that I didn’t understand what I was feeling. I understood it all too well—which confused me even more.
I finally stole a glance at him, my massive, stoic gargoyle, and his stony profile revealed nothing.
No, not my gargoyle—just the gargoyle who I happened to make a deal with and live in his castle with for the foreseeable future.
Yet, also the gargoyle whom I’d just kissed. My fingers rose with an itch for me to press them against my lips, feel the heat of him that still lingered there.
Kissing him had been a terrible idea, waking up a part of me that wanted more.
In my bed that night, I stared at the ceiling, repeating all the sensible arguments in my head. He was cursed. He wasn’t human. He had forced me to stay here.
I sighed. None of it mattered.
I knew what I wanted.
More.
And that frightened me more than he ever had.
The next night, Hadrien and I maintained a formal distance, giving each other space after that unexpected kiss.
But we still dined together, albeit more reserved than the night before.
Conversation was stilted. We kept it to plants, the wards, the castle, magic—anything besides the kiss.
Since we still had to work together, we still had to figure out a way to work together.
After dinner, we walked through the forest to the ward, both of us silent. I bit my lower lip as I wondered if he was thinking about what we’d done out here last night.
No, that wouldn’t help me get it out of my mind. Hadn’t I thought about it far too much after I’d returned to my room last night? Thinking about him and how he’d touched me with his large hand. How he took control. How he kissed me…
I exhaled. This wasn’t going to be easy.
“Everything okay?” he asked.
“Yes, just thinking,” I replied.
“About?”
Your hands on me. Your lips. What else we could do alone together…
“Some spells I was reading about earlier,” I lied. “What we should try tonight.”
“Ah,” he said with a grunt.
“We’ll figure it out,” I said, trying to convince myself as much as him.
When he arched a brow with his usual skepticism, I added, “We just need to find the right combination.” I motioned to him. “I need to find the right source to act as a conduit.”
We didn’t say much as we walked into La Forêt de Veillepierre after the sun had set.
What could we say after that charged moment between us when we’d been out here alone last night?
I didn’t have a clue. I shouldn’t want him, not after what he’d done to my family and me, and yet—he’d still shown some kindness.
And I couldn’t help but feel for him in his torment, caused by our common enemy—the queen.
Once we reached the ward, we held hands and tried to ignite that spark of energy as we’d done the night before. Nothing. No spark. No heat like that electrifying warmth that had coursed through us both last night. Something was off. Was it the tension between us? Or something wrong with the spell?
After several frustrating minutes, I shook my head. “It’s not working tonight.”
Hadrien’s lip rose in a semi-scowl. “Must have been beginner’s luck yesterday.”
“No,” I countered. “It’s us.”
He cocked his head and appraised me. “What do you mean?”
“We’re too tense.” I rolled my shoulders and shook out some tension in my arms.
He stared at me and then blinked slowly. “Do you have a suggestion?”
I gazed back at him as my lips tugged up into a sly smile. “Got any games in the castle?”