Chapter 19
CHAPTER 19
TOBIAS BARRETT
I stare at my computer screen, the sounds of Kiki and Skyler outside playing together coming through the open window. I’m embarrassed about last night, so this morning I shut myself in my office, unable to face Kiki. I’m back to wearing my usual business attire. I feel foolish for even thinking that changing my clothes would make Kiki like me.
I exhale. I thought things were going well. I really felt like Kiki and I had mutual feelings. I’m confused about why she rejected me. Did I move too fast? Did I let Levi’s taunting get to me and do something I shouldn’t have? I shake my head and stand up.
Skyler giggles outside, and part the curtain to peek at her. She and Kiki are running through the sprinkler. Oh, dear heavens. I never should have looked out the window. Kiki’s wearing a pink and white striped swimsuit, and I can’t stop staring at her curves. I’m amazed once again that I didn’t think she was beautiful when I first saw her. She keeps proving me wrong.
Skyler screams as the water sprays her. Kiki runs and grabs her, picking her up and flying her through the air. Skyler holds her arms out wide.
“You look like an airplane,” Kiki says laughing.
Skyler giggles as she flies through the air. The pure joy on her face touches me. Even though Kiki rejected me, I swallow my pride for the sake of my daughter. Skyler matters most to me.
Kiki sets her down next to the sprinkler.
“Fly me again!” Sky lifts her arms up and I chuckle. I could have predicted that one.
Kiki’s a good sport and flies Skyler around until I’m sure her arms ache. “Let’s go dry off and we can make chocolate chip muffins,” she finally suggests. Skyler, of course, doesn’t object.
I close the window and go back to my computer. I need to respond to about a hundred emails and look at five business proposals. As I work, the smell of the chocolate chip muffins wafts in and my stomach growls. Even though I want one, I stay in my office. I work until it’s past lunchtime.
As I’m scrolling through the second proposal, Kiki knocks and then enters my office. I look up. “Yes?”
“I thought you might be hungry.” She brings a plate to me. It has a sandwich and a muffin. How did she know I was dying for one of those?
I pick up the muffin and take a bite. It’s as delicious as it smells. “Thanks.” I try to ignore her and continue reading through the proposal, but she doesn’t leave, and I can’t comprehend the words on my screen.
Finally, when it’s clear she’s not leaving, I look up at her. She twists her fingers together and shifts her weight. She’s wearing a simple tank top and cut off shorts, and she looks like she feels as awkward as I do.
Gah. I’m such a dolt. Why is this so hard? Employer. Employee. Hands off. She stares at the floor, the tension between us is palpable. “Do you need something else?” I finally ask.
“About last night…” She lifts her gaze, and I take in a deep breath.
It’s plain to me that I messed up everything. She’s uncomfortable, and I want to hide under my desk. This is so not good. “Let’s forget last night,” I blurt out.
Her shoulders square. “Yes. Let’s go back to the way things were before.”
It’s not as simple as that, but just agreeing that we need to forget about the kiss makes me feel better. “That’s a good idea.”
“Skyler’s been asking if we can go to the marina. I don’t want to bother you if you have work, but she seems so excited about it.”
At that moment Skyler comes running into my office. “Please, Daddy? Can we go to the marina?”
Guilt surfaces in my chest. I haven’t had time to take her there for the last few months. Why is it that no matter what I do, I feel like I’m failing as a parent? Is this how all parents feel?
Kiki bites her lip. “I’m sorry, I tried to keep her in the kitchen. If you’re too busy for the marina?—”
“I’m almost done.” I shut my laptop to hide my lies. I can’t say no to that angelic face grinning at me. Things might be a bit awkward with Kiki since I messed up, but we have to get past it. She’s a great nanny and I can’t lose her. “I can take you over there.”
“Yay!” Skyler shouts and jumps up and down. She runs out of the office. Kiki smiles at me, although it seems strained.
“I’ll be ready in a few minutes.” I pick up the sandwich Kiki made for me and take a bite. It’s ham and cheese, but there’s another flavor in it that I can’t decipher. “This is good. What’s in it?”
“Ham, lettuce, mayo, cheese, olives and a little drizzle of Italian dressing.”
I raise my eyebrows. “Italian dressing?”
“I don’t know why, but my grandmother always made sandwiches that way. It tastes really good, don’t you think?”
I smile, touched that she would put so much effort into making me some lunch. I know how close she was to her grandmother. “It does.”
“I’ll get Skyler ready to go.” Kiki leaves my office, and I stare down at the sandwich, my throat tight. Even though I messed everything up, she still took the time to think about me. It melts my heart.
I shake my head. I need to get a grip. All she did was make me a sandwich.
After finishing lunch, I head to the living room. Kiki and Skyler stand as I enter the room. Skyler runs to me. “Are we going to the marina now?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Can we take a boat tour?” Skyler pleads with her hands.
I look at Kiki. “Do you get seasick?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know. I’ve never been on a boat.”
“Never?” Skyler says, her eyes wide.
Kiki laughs. “Where I grew up, there was no seashore. Not even very many lakes. Just a lot of corn fields.”
“Wow,” Skyler says, like she’s amazed Kiki survived in that environment. It makes me smile, and I ruffle her hair.
I drive us to the marina and park the car. Once we’re out of the vehicle Skyler grabs Kiki’s hand and pulls her toward the boardwalk and the network of docks and piers where all the boats are moored. I follow closely behind them.
Skyler points to a boat that’s backing out of the marina. “Look, Kiki!”
“That’s cool. Can you read what it says on the side?”
“No.”
“It reads, Willow Breeze ,” Kiki says, pointing. “That’s what they named their boat.”
“ Willow Breeze ,” Skyler repeats, like it’s the coolest thing in the world.
I leave them and walk over to the tour stand to talk to the man behind the counter. “When does your next tour boat leave?”
“In about ten minutes. You want to buy some tickets?”
“Sure.” I pull out my wallet and get us three tickets for the one-hour tour.
I motion to Kiki. “The tour starts in ten minutes.”
She brings Skyler over to me. “This will be fun,” she says and I can tell she’s trying to be lighthearted, but I still sense the tension between us that I created when I stepped out of line last night.
The man helps us climb into the boat. There are several other people on the boat already, and Kiki finds a space that will seat the three of us. We sit down, and Skyler climbs on Kiki’s lap.
I sit quietly and watch Kiki interacting with Skyler. I love how attentive Kiki is with my daughter. When Skyler is talking, Kiki’s full attention is on her. It’s like she’s mesmerized by her. I don’t know why, but this makes me even more attracted to her.
I shake my head and look away. What’s wrong with me? Why am I determined to mess things up? Kiki is a wonderful nanny. I need to keep myself in check because I’ll chase her away if I come on to her again.
Another couple climbs onto the boat, and I have to scoot closer to Kiki. I put my arm on the back of the seat without thinking about it. My hand brushes against Kiki’s bare shoulder and I freeze. I didn’t mean to touch her. I pull my arm down and look away, embarrassed that I made such a stupid mistake. Kiki doesn’t say anything.
An older woman turns to Kiki. “How old is your little girl?”
Kiki’s cheeks turn pink. “She belongs to him.” Kiki points to me.
“Really?” The woman stares at Skyler. “She looks just like you.”
Kiki’s eyes widen and her cheeks turn pink. I’m sure because she doesn’t want people assuming we’re a couple. I stand and point out at the water. “Hey, is that a dolphin?”
Everyone turns to look, including the woman. “Oh, maybe it wasn’t,” I say when no dolphin emerges.
The boat jerks to life, and the tour guide starts to talk about the island. I sneak a peek at Kiki and Skyler. I hadn’t noticed before, but the woman is right. They carry a striking resemblance. Skyler’s freckles mirror Kiki’s, their hair color is similar, and they both have a cute nose that turns up at the end. I can see why the woman would assume.
Skyler climbs off Kiki’s lap and looks over the edge of the boat to try to see marine life.
As the tour progresses, I nudge Kiki. “How are you doing? No sea sickness?”
She shakes her head. “I’m fine. This is cool. I’m learning all kinds of things about the island I didn’t know.”
The tour guide pulls the boat close to a rocky shore and stops. “You can see many turtles here.”
Skyler points and shouts. “It’s turtles, Kiki!”
Kiki kneels on the bench beside Skyler. “I see them. How many do you see?”
“Lots.”
“Let’s count them.” Kiki puts her arm around Skyler and helps her count the turtles.
After we get a good look at the turtles, the tour guide maneuvers the boat away from the island. We travel for a few minutes, circling around the other way. “We can usually see some dolphins in this area.”
He’s right. Soon we see dolphins along side the boat, jumping and sticking their noses up from the water. Skyler squeals with delight.
As she watches the dolphins, I lean toward Kiki. “I’m sorry that woman thought we were together. I could tell it embarrassed you, but don’t worry. It didn’t bother me.”
She shakes her head. “It’s okay.” She hugs herself, and the tension is back between us.
I look out at the ocean, hating the way Kiki’s uncomfortable around me now. We’d been on friendly terms before. I totally destroyed that.