27. Allie
Allie
S omething nudged my side. Then a small hand whacked me in the face.
I cracked open my eyes. I’d had Ollie in my bed enough times to recognize his octopus tendencies.
He was still fast asleep despite the sunlight leaking into the room. Warmth flooded my heart. He looked relaxed and he was safe.
Then I blinked. This wasn’t my bedroom.
I recognized the Langston Windward suite.
Caden’s suite.
Last night was a blur. All I remembered was the volatile, paralyzing mix of panic, worry, and fear. Then the sweet relief as soon as I’d had Ollie back.
God, Blake had lured Ollie away.
I ground my teeth together. He was a first-grade asshole to mix a kid up in his games.
Anger stirred and I welcomed the hot burn.
He had to be stopped. The entitled prick thought he could get away with anything.
I’d help Caden bring him down.
Caden .
I sat up. I’d yelled at him. He’d found Ollie, and I’d been so absorbed in my kid that I hadn’t even spoken with him afterward. Hadn’t thanked him.
Oh God.
I knew that deep down he felt like he’d failed Wells and the others on his team. He’d take the blame for this, and it wasn’t his fault.
Carefully sliding out of the bed, I noted my leggings and wrinkled, long-sleeved shirt. I vaguely remembered having a shower and pulling on clothes Tessa had gotten from my locker. I smoothed out my tangled hair and found a new toothbrush in the bathroom.
When I came back out, Ollie was still asleep.
I headed into the living area, but there was no sign of Caden.
Damn . I needed to talk with him. I needed to explain where my head had been last night, and thank him for finding Ollie.
God, I hoped the girl who’d OD’d was okay.
The front door opened, and I spun.
Caden appeared, wearing workout gear. Yum . I was so used to seeing him in suits, but looking at him in a tight, black compression shirt and black shorts made my mouth water.
“Hi.”
He quietly closed the door. “Good morning. How’s Ollie?”
My mouth went dry. His tone was cool and his face was all closed down.
“He’s still asleep, but he’s fine.” I dredged up a smile. “Thank God everything worked out okay. Is the girl who overdosed all right?”
Caden nodded. “I called the hospital this morning and she’s going to be fine. She got lucky.”
Silence fell.
“So you hit the gym this morning?” God, that was lame.
He lifted his chin. “With my buddy from the military, Gunnar.”
“The man who was with you last night.”
“That’s him.”
“With everything going on, I didn’t get a chance to meet him.
” This all felt wrong. We were talking like two strangers having a polite conversation about the weather.
He wasn’t coming to me, touching me. I wanted to close the distance, but I got the sense he wouldn’t welcome that.
Instead, he was cold, and I felt like there was a wall between us.
“You’ll get the chance to meet him,” Caden said. “Gunnar is going to be the new head of security for the Langston Windward.”
My heart stopped. “You…found someone for the job.”
“Yes. Now I can get back to my work.”
And leave.
I felt nausea crawl up my throat. “Caden, I wanted to thank you for finding Ollie last night.”
“He was missing because of me. I lost him.
“No,” I gasped out.
“I let Moreland take him. You knew last night that it was my fault. I didn’t protect him.”
“God, no, Caden.” I took a step forward and reached my hand out.
He inched back.
It was the smallest move, but it cut me deep. I let my hand drop and felt the yawning gulf between us. “It wasn’t your fault. You were busy saving that girl’s life?—”
“It was a distraction that Moreland planned.” Caden straightened. “This just…put things into perspective. You and Ollie don’t need anyone. You’re a unit, a family. That isn’t for me.”
I felt small bits of my heart crumbling to pieces. I was losing him. He was standing right in front of me and I was losing him.
“We do need you. We want you. I want you.”
He shook his head.
“Caden…” My voice was a broken whisper.
“This is for the best, Allie.”
Anger poked through my pain. “Best for who? Me or you?”
His head jerked.
“You came home from the military, and it was tough and there were challenges, and then you left your mom and sisters.”
A muscle ticked in his jaw. “It was better for them.”
“No, I think it was better for you. Your job means that you don’t have to get too close to anyone, you don’t have to care. This way, you won’t lose anyone, you avoid the pain.”
His face hardened to pure stone.
“You move around, you don’t plant roots, you don’t let people in.” I took a step forward. “Until me.”
He stayed silent.
I shook my head. “You’re running away, and that’s not for my benefit.” I stared at him, willing him to talk to me.
He stayed silent.
I looked away, trying not to lose it in front of him. I’d hold myself together. I was good at that. “As soon as Ollie wakes up, we’ll get out of your way.”
Spinning, I faced the windows and wrapped my arms around my middle, trying to hold all the broken pieces together.
I waited for him to say something, anything. I wanted him to say something.
A moment later, I heard the front door open and close, and knew I was alone.
My heart felt like it was going to fall out of my chest. A tear ran down my cheek, then another.
God . I hurt so much.
There was a knock on the door, then I heard it open.
“Hello?” Tessa’s voice. “I saw Caden leaving, and he said to come in.”
Swiping at my tears, I turned. “Hey.”
“How are you and Ollie? I thought—” My friend stopped in her tracks, staring at me. “What happened?”
“What I should have known would happen. Caden pulled the plug on us.”
“No.” Tessa moved to me and threw her arms around my shoulders.
“He’s shut down and pushed me out.”
“He’ll come to his senses, Allie. Things are just a little raw after what happened last night.”
I felt cold, then hot. “I…need some air. Will you stay with Ollie?”
She nodded. “Sure.”
I slipped into the only shoes I had, the green ballet slippers that matched my Tinkerbell dress. I remembered how excited I’d been for Caden to take that stupid dress off me, for me to make love to him with those silly wings on. The pain made my lips tremble.
If I was going outside, I needed better shoes than these. I had some running shoes in my locker.
“I won’t be long.” I pressed a hand to my aching chest. “I promised Caden we’d get out of his suite once Ollie was awake.”
“That man…” She shook her head. “He’s shaken up after last night. He’s out of practice with feeling and dealing with his emotions. It’s going to work out.”
She hadn’t seen him. Hadn’t heard the resolution in his voice. I needed to get out of there. “I’ll be back in a bit.”
I used the stairs to avoid running into anyone. I didn’t want to talk and I certainly didn’t want to run into Caden.
I made it to the locker room and opened my locker. That’s when I saw the block of Dandelion chocolate resting on the shelf. I picked it up, smoothing my fingers over the pretty wrapper. He must have left it for me yesterday.
Before he decided that we weren’t worth the risk.
I closed my eyes.
After a shaky breath, I pulled my shoes and hoodie off the shelf. I pulled the hoodie on and slipped the chocolate bar into the pocket. I sat down and laced up my shoes.
Some fresh air would help me clear my head. I just needed to shake this off enough so I could deal with it. Just like I’d dealt with every other shitty situation. I was Allie Ford. I wouldn’t break. Not when I had a little boy depending on me.
When I reached the lobby, I scanned around to make sure there was no sign of Caden. I was halfway across the space when I heard masculine laughter. My head whipped up
Blake and the ESG were walking into the great room.
I stood there, rage filling me. It welled up, oozing into every corner of me like acid. It was far better than the pain.
Blake had instigated all of this. He’d terrified me, he’d taken Ollie, all as part of his sick game. Indirectly, he’d driven Caden away.
I sucked in a breath. I was sick of being a pawn. Hands balling, I strode into the great room, aiming right for Blake and his cronies.
His friends saw me coming and elbowed each other. When Blake’s gaze hit me, he rose from the chair, a superior look on his face.
Walking right up to him, I shoved him in the chest. “You touched my kid. You crossed a fucking line.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Don’t be even more of a cowardly asshole than you already are.” He had to be stopped.
I was going to stop him.
I’d find his damn drug stash, get the evidence we needed, and watch him get locked behind bars.
A plan snapped into place in my head.
Lowering my voice, I leaned in. “Do you know why I was interested in you and your…side gig? Why I kept hanging around? Because I wanted a fix.”
His eyes widened. “Bullshit.”
“My brother and his wife were both shot in the head by a carjacker. I had to identify them. I inherited my five-year-old nephew. I gave up my dream job and life in New York City to come back to the bumfuck mountain town that I escaped. All I do is clean other people’s crap and take care of my kid. That’s it.”
His gaze turned assessing. “You’re cozy with that security guy.”
I cut a hand through the air. “I like a good fuck when I can.” Ugh, I hated spilling these lies, but I needed him to trust me. “I need some relief from the grind.” I cocked my head. “I was hoping you had one for me. Of the chemical variety.”
He watched me for a moment. “Maybe I had you wrong.”
“Obviously. You didn’t need to shove me in the trunk of a car or take my kid.” I crossed my arms. “Now I think you owe me.”
He cocked his head. “Okay, Allie. I can hook you up.”
I made myself smile. “Now?”
“Now.” He took my hand, and I had to fight the urge to yank away. “We’ll be back later, guys.”
He towed me out of the great room. Discreetly, I glanced up at one of the security cameras.
Come on, Caden.
Things between us might be messed up, but I knew he’d want to stop Blake.
As we crossed the lobby, I looked for the cameras again. Behind the reception desk, I saw Coral frowning at us. I gave her a long look.
Before I knew it, we were outside.
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“For a little walk.”
The Halloween Spectacular area was mostly packed up, but there were a few trucks and workers taking things down and cleaning up. We walked past the biking area, but I didn’t see Sierra thankfully.
Then Blake led me up one of the hiking trails and into the trees.
God, how would Caden find me here? There weren’t any cameras.
We walked along the path, and I slipped my shaking hands into the pocket of my hoodie.
My chocolate bar.
I pulled it out.
Blake glanced back. “What’s that?”
“Chocolate.” I unwrapped it and popped a piece in my mouth. “Want some?”
He shook his head and looked back to the path ahead.
I tore a piece of chocolate off, including a piece of the gold and white wrapper. Then I dropped it on the ground.
Find me, Caden .