Chapter 42
FORTY-TWO
CIARA
“You know, this is starting to feel uncomfortably familiar,” Dr. Donaldson announced as she examined my head.
“There were no bullet wounds last time,” I groused.
“Alex is being treated down the hall. He had full range of motion, and the bullet went clean through. He’ll be fine.”
“It’s just a flesh wound, right?” I scowled at my brother, where he stood in the corner of the exam room, then wished I hadn’t, as the pounding ache in my head got worse.
“If Doc Albright sees anything concerning, he’ll make sure your man does whatever needs doing to rectify it,” Dr. Donaldson assured me.
My man. I’d have felt better if I had eyes on him.
Once the police had arrived, my captor—Johanna Klein, I’d been told—had been arrested and carted off to the police station. Callum and Finn had followed behind as escort, to make sure she actually got there. Constable Williamson had interviewed us briefly at the scene to get the essentials, before Alex lost patience and insisted I needed medical attention. Never mind the blood that had soaked through the makeshift bandage Ewan had fashioned out of some kitchen towels.
We’d all come into the clinic together, but I couldn’t shake the sense that something was wrong. There was a remoteness to Alex I didn’t like. Maybe it was to do with whatever switch he’d had to flip in order to do the job he’d done for so long, and maybe he’d snap out of it. But what if it was something more? I needed to see him. To reassure him—and myself—that everything really was fine. That this prolonged nightmare was finally over.
“I hate that this happened… well, at all. But I especially hate that it happened today. What actually happened with the wedding?”
Isobel spoke up from her perch on the visitor’s chair in the corner. “Oh, actually, despite all the chaos, once we got word that you were safe, the wedding still went off fine. And Christina insisted on saving you cake.”
“That’s really sweet. A little weird, but sweet.”
“I think she feels terrible that something like this happened in the middle of her big day.”
“It certainly wasn’t her fault. Nobody was expecting anybody to get kidnapped. If anything, I feel terrible that this interrupted her festivities. We’ve been planning this wedding for a year!”
“Well, she’s married now,” Isobel pointed out practically. “And she definitely has a story to tell her grandchildren someday that no one else will have.”
“Well, you are, again, very lucky. Another concussion, and that’s a hell of a bruise on your head, but it could be a lot worse.” Dr. Donaldson tugged off her exam gloves. “It’ll be the same routine as before. Let’s see if we can avoid cracking your noggin again, aye?”
“That is certainly the goal.”
“Since this is your second in less than a month, I want to see you again for a checkup in a few days.”
“I’ll do anything you want. I just want to rest and get out of this suit.”
“Fair enough.”
My parents rose from the waiting area as soon as I stepped out of the exam room.
“Oh my God, my baby.” Mum folded me into her arms.
“It’s okay. I’m safe. The person who did this is in jail and going to stay that way.”
“Let’s get you home, love,” Dad insisted.
The last thing I wanted was to get taken home and smothered again. I needed Alex.
Spotting Doc Albright speaking to the receptionist, I called out, “Are you through with Alex?”
“Oh, aye. He’s already gone.”
I jerked away from my mother. “Gone? Where?”
“Home to clean up, I believe.”
Could he even do that alone? Why wouldn’t he have waited for me? That sense of disquiet grew stronger.
“Look, I just want to go back to my flat and get some quiet. I swear if I need anything, I’ll let you know. But I need to check on Alex.”
“We’ll take her and see that she properly rests,” Isobel assured them.
It was clear both my parents wanted to argue, but they held their tongues.
Isobel drove us the short distance to my flat. It took longer than I wanted to make it up the stairs, as my head was feeling extra swimmy with the throbbing. But I was relieved to spot Alex as soon as I stepped inside.
“How’s your shoulder?”
“Fine.” The word was clipped, and he barely glanced at me.
Something was very wrong, and I could only hope that I had enough functional brain cells to handle it.
Turning back to the door, I glanced at Isobel and Ewan. “Can you give us some privacy for a bit?”
Ewan nodded. “We’ll run downstairs. I’m going to go check on some things at the pub.”
“Great.”
The moment they headed back down the stairs, I shut the door. “This wasn’t your fault.”
Alex looked at me from across the room. He’d changed clothes, into another long-sleeved T-shirt and fresh jeans. I could just see the edge of gauze pads peeking out from the collar.
“That’s what you’re thinking, isn’t it? You’re blaming yourself for someone else’s actions.”
“You canna dispute the fact that this wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t been involved with me.”
I suspected if it hadn’t been me, it would have been someone else. But I didn’t think that would help, so I kept it to myself.
“You cannot take ownership of the behavior of someone who’s clearly unhinged. Think about all the lives you saved because of that mission. How many more names would have been leaked? How many more operatives would’ve been compromised? How many more missions would’ve failed? You saved lives, Alex. You saved mine today.”
When I got near him, he paced away, restless frustration and anger rolling off him in waves. “You should never have been put in that position. I should never have started this up again.”
“Okay, first off, you didn’t start this up again. I did. I’m the one who asked for your help with Brodie. I was having problems with him before she ever came along and fanned the flames of his obsession.” The evidence of her surveillance had been found in the bedroom. No question. The photos sent to Brodie had come from her. “He was harassing me all by himself. I asked for your help, and you gave it. After that, it was a mutual decision that this should turn real again.”
Moving slower this time, lest I spook him, I laid a hand on his arm. The muscles beneath my palm trembled with tension. “Nothing needs to change here, Alex. You solved the problem. The threat has been neutralized. It’s done.”
“Aye. It’s done. This won’t happen again. I won’t allow it.”
As he stepped back, I looked past him into the bedroom and spotted the duffel bag at the foot of the bed, all zipped and ready to go. Suddenly frantic, I glanced around. The kitten and all her accoutrements were gone. He must’ve already taken them back to his flat.
Panic wrapped like a claw around my throat. “What are you doing?”
“I’m the problem. I’m what made you a target. So I’m removing myself from the equation.” He shouldered the bag and moved toward the door.
“Alex, no. This wasn’t your fault.”
“Nobody else is going to get hurt because of me or anything else that I’ve done.”
I tried to rush after him but had to stop when the room made a slow revolution. “Alex, stop. Please, let’s talk about this.”
He didn’t slow. “There’s nothing to talk about. My mind’s made up. I won’t endanger you or anyone else anymore.”
Bile rose in my throat, and I gripped the back of the chair like a vise lest I slide like a puddle to the floor. “Alex?—”
He finally looked at me, his hand on the door. “I made promises to you last time, and I hurt you terribly when I broke them. The only promise I’m making now is that this is the last time I’ll hurt you. You’re better off without me.”
“I’m not!” My voice broke. “Alex, don’t do this.”
“It’s what’s best. Have a beautiful life, Ciara. And don’t wait for me.”
“Alex!”
But he’d already shut the door. By the time I managed to get across to open it again, he’d disappeared like the ghost he’d been trained to be. I sank down onto the top step and wept as he broke my heart all over again.