EPILOGUE AFTER THE STORM
Ican’t believe it’s our anniversary.
It’s been exactly one year since Kenneth came back into my life.
Well, since I chased him down and made sure he was part of it again.
I’ve wondered what our life together would be like if I had never had that accident and gone back in time six months.
Would we be as happy as we are now? Would I love him the way I do now?
Something tells me no. That we had to go through that together for this love to feel earned.
And it does—I’ve fought for this tooth and nail.
We both have. It’s what makes it even sweeter. More meaningful.
To celebrate, I’ve brought him back to Race Point Beach, the place I took him in what I call our past life.
A place I thought for sure I’d never see again.
I still remember the way we lay on the sand and watched the stars, how I taught him about constellations.
I remember everything I said that night, word for word.
The touches that nobody else witnessed. The sex that felt like poetry.
Back then, I thought that was the best night of my life. And now, I know it still is.
This is still the best night of my life.
It’s early evening now—Ken’s beloved golden hour.
It’s a quiet, glowing mirror of the night we shared back then, too.
The waves crash in the same rhythm, making my heart beat just a bit faster.
The same birds call out at the exact same times.
The same breeze brushes against my face.
It feels the same, but different. Because this time it’s perfect.
I squeeze Ken’s hand as we walk along the shore and look at the same hoodie he wore back then, too. My hoodie. It brings a smile to my face, and Ken turns towards me at the exact moment my lips tip up. The dimple on the apple of his cheek deepens at his grin, and my heart speeds up again.
“Déjà vu.” Kenny laughs. “Weird, right?”
“Not weird,” I whisper, shaking my head. “Perfect.”
Kenny starts walking a little faster, and I let go of his hand to let him walk ahead, my hands shaking slightly.
I watch him look over his shoulder at me with a big smile, and the sound of my heart beating drowns out the waves.
Both timelines seem to be crashing into one perfect moment.
Our perfect moment. It feels like fate was rewritten by our love.
Like all roads were leading us back here.
“Hey, Ken?” I call out to him, and he turns.
I slowly approach him, and he waits patiently for me. The sun is setting now, almost gone, with barely any gold left in the sky. The darkness of the night starts wrapping us in a cocoon, the stars making an appearance. Seems like I picked the perfect moment for this.
“I brought you here the first time because I wanted to show you a part of me no one had ever seen. We were new and messy, but we were perfect. We were us, two halves of one whole.” I smile at him, and he bites his bottom lip.
“That night was the first time I truly understood what it was like to be loved. Really loved. You held me like I was your entire world. Like I was all you saw.” Kenny’s eyes water.
“You looked at me like I was worthy of you. Like you wanted to stay.”
He’s quiet. The only sound between us is the symphony of crashing waves.
Even my heart has slowed down now. This is the most sure I’ve ever been of anything in my entire life, and as I look into Ken’s eyes and the single tear streaming down his cheek, I stop thinking.
I kiss his tear away, and then the words just slip from my lips.
“Before I lost you, I finally had it all,” I tell him, grabbing both his hands in mine.
“I held you like you were precious, but I didn’t hold on tight enough.
That’s a mistake I’ll never make again. But the universe gave me one more chance to do it all over again.
If that’s not fate, I don’t know what is, Kenny.
Every step I’ve taken since then has been to get back to you. To our love.”
I take a step back and kneel in front of him, my hand shaking as I get the ring from my pocket.
“I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you, Ken. Like I’ll die without you. You’re the blood in my veins, the oxygen in my lungs. Without you, I don’t exist.” Ken gulps as I hold the ring up between us now. “Will you let me love you forever, Kenny?” I ask, voice shaking. “Will you marry me?”
Kenneth grabs the hand holding up the ring, tilting it at an angle, and gasps. He covers his mouth as tears stream down his face and reads the engraving on the inside.
“For the second time I loved you,” he whispers.
“And every time after that,” I say softly.
He drops to his knees in front of me, throwing his arms around my neck. “Yes. Yes. Of course, yes,” he says, voice sure and steady. “There has never been a different answer to this question. I’ll marry you, Conrad. I’ll spend the rest of my life by your side.”
“Once isn’t enough.” I smile, kissing his lips gently. “I want all your lives, Kenny. Every version. Every time. Forever.”
I grab his hand from around my neck and slide the ring onto his finger, then kiss him again. This time, I pour all my love into it, grabbing the back of his head and crushing our mouths together. Nothing has ever felt like this. My heart is full, and I’m convinced I’ll never feel empty again.
I pull away. “I love you, my starry-eyed boy.”
Kenny grins. “I love you. Always.”
We drop onto the sand right here, lying on our backs and looking up at the stars.
I tell him all about the constellations, the ones we talked about back then.
And I finally find our star too. I tell him all about it, and there’s unfiltered awe on his face as he focuses on the stars and what I’m saying.
I point at our star. “So you can find your way back to me.”
He turns his head and smiles, and all feels right in the world. “I’ll always find my way back to you.”
Maybe we were always meant to break in order to learn how to love. But we found our way back, and this time, I’m not letting go.
Never again.