Chapter 24 #2
She nodded as he kissed her neck, awakening every nerve in her body as his tongue drew circles against her skin.
He positioned himself between her legs and knocked down her every emotional wall as he entered her.
Cassidy was amazing in bed. He had the type of dick that made women bust out car windows.
He was so thick, and the perfect length, and his head was so wide that Sloan’s mouth watered.
Cassidy was a pinch hitter. He was the one to hit it out of the park when others who had tried failed.
He stroked her slowly but with an aggression that told her he had some heat on his chest. He dove deep until he was rooted so deeply inside her that all she could do was suck in air.
Was this punishment? Unrequited love? Had she denied him one too many times and now he was weary to give her what she needed?
He was right. She did know better, but she still wanted to hear the words.
She was desperate for reassurance. She was desperate for him; for this.
Heavy breathing filled the space between their lips until he took those too.
It was in the way that he fucked Sloan that blew her mind.
He was so grateful for her. He was patient but wanting at the same time.
He was aggressive in a way that let her know he was in control, yet his stroke didn’t come with an ounce of pain.
All she could do was submit while he put in work.
He lifted her legs over his shoulders and pulled her hips into him, and she cried out in ecstasy.
“Cassidy,” she moaned. She couldn’t not call his name.
She wanted to scream that shit. Sign it.
Write it in Braille. Tag that shit to a wall.
She had thought the first time had been good because of the anticipation that had led up to the moment, but nah, the nigga was just magnificent.
He tested her limitations and sexed her like he had read her body’s manual.
He understood that his size could be a bad thing if he went too hard.
He was delivering pleasure, and he never took her past the threshold where pain existed.
Hands everywhere. Mouth everywhere. Dick every fucking where.
The hand to her neck was the sexiest shit she had ever experienced.
She would have never trusted any other man to choke her.
It was an immediate trigger, normally. With Cassidy, it was erotic and dominant.
She was in love with this man, and she knew it now more than ever because of the level of trust she was extending.
She didn’t even know why she was acting like there was a choice in this matter.
This man had her soul. He owned her body, and the heart that she was trying to keep control of was giving in.
It was a complete takeover. Yes, she was terrified, and she still wanted this shit.
All of it. All this love. He was hitting it so good that her legs trembled, and he lowered them, showing that he was merciful in these sheets.
Her back arched off the bed as she absorbed his stroke. He brought her to orgasm, then turned her to the side and stroked her there, dick so thick and long it was effortless for him to hit it until he came too. He held her from behind, playing in her hair as he bit gently on her ear.
She reached back and placed her hand on the side of his face, closing her eyes. How she had ever questioned whether he was safe was foolish. There was no place safer. She could feel love all over her body.
“That day at the store changed my life,” Cassidy muttered.
“It wouldn’t have taken me 23 years to get here with you if it wasn’t for that day.
” She didn’t move. Didn’t breathe because she didn’t want him to stop talking.
He wrapped one arm around Sloan and held her tight as he found his place in the groove of her neck.
She stared at the wall and held onto his arms as he continued.
“She bumped right into him when we were leaving. I’ve never seen my mother so afraid.
He walked up on her, smiling. He called her Caramel, like that was her name.
It was casual enough. He seemed friendly.
He was happy to see her, but it was the look on her face that told me something was off.
I remember her hands shaking as we got in the car, and she was quiet the entire way home, but her hands…
they just kept shaking. I remember that part so well for some reason.
When we pulled into the driveway, and I went to help her from the car, the entire seat was wet.
She was so terrified that she peed herself.
Papa was at work. I carried her into the house and up to her room.
I tried to clean her up, and she gripped my hand so tight, and she said that she hadn’t seen his face in 25 years.
That man from the grocery store had raped her from the time she was five years old until she was 13.
He lived across the street from her as a child, and she used to play with his daughter.
My grandma used to send her over there for play dates.
That nigga used to make his daughter take a nap and rape my mama while she was there.
It only stopped because she moved to the other side of town when my grandmother got a job as a housekeeper for a white woman on the Southside.
She never said a word to anyone, until she told me, and she made me promise not to tell anyone, and I haven’t— until now. Papa don’t even know.”
Sloan’s heart tore in half.
“Oh, Cassidy,” she whispered sympathetically.
“I found out where that nigga lived the same night, went over there strapped. I had used a gun before, hadn’t killed nobody, but I had shot at niggas on some tough guy shit, so I thought it would be easy.
The nigga had violated my mama. It was the heaviest trigger I had ever felt.
He saw me hesitate, and he came at me, took my gun, put it point blank to my head, and the gun jammed.
I was supposed to be dead right then and there.
He was a big nigga, had a lot of weight on him.
I remember thinking of my mom as a little girl under all that weight.
He grabbed the pole first. I don’t even know where it came from. ”
Sloan’s hands moved to her throat. She felt like she was choking because she remembered this part of the story from the trial. She remembered the bruises on his neck. The defense had made the old man sound like a victim who had fought back and lost.
“He choked you with it,” Sloan whispered. Her tears flowed, creating a salty river from her eyes to her mouth.
“The whole room was fading out. My shit was burning so bad. My lungs just needed air. He was a drunk, and I was grabbing for anything. The bottle on the floor beside me was what my hands found first. I hit him as hard as I could, and it was enough to get him up off me and get him to drop that pole. I grabbed that bitch, and I swung. I ain’t let up off that nigga until I was sure he wouldn’t get up.
I swung what felt like a hundred times,” Cassidy whispered.
He sniffed and thumbed away a tear that had escaped.
He cleared his throat, and she felt him stiffen behind her, restoring his strength.
“The nigga violated my mama, so I handled that for her. Nobody protected her, so I did, and no, Sloan, you, or nobody else will ever make me regret that. I gave up half my life. They buried my mama while I was in there, wouldn’t even let me out to come to the funeral.
I missed birthdays, holidays. My sister became a grown woman, and my dad aged and got sick.
Friends forgot about me. You outgrew me and became Superwoman.
It was all a sacrifice, but it was worth it because my mama got to know what protection felt like before she died.
She felt safe. She visited me every week, until she was too sick to come, and even then, she wrote me letters, and she never judged me.
She thanked me. She was proud of me, and that’s enough.
I’ll eat those years every time for her. You’re the first person I’ve told.”
“But Ellie knows,” Sloan whispered.
“Ellie don’t know,” Cassidy said. “She’s guessed pretty damn closely over the years, and she put a story together in her head based on what she heard at trial, and what she saw at the grocery store that day, but I’ve never come out and told her.
I never had to. She knew that I killed him, and she knew I had a reason, and she never questioned if I was justified or not. She knew I was because she knew me.”
Sloan had to fold her lips in to trap her emotion.
That last part was for her. She had treated him like a stranger, like everything she knew about him didn’t exist. He was right.
She should have known. She turned to him, kissing his lips.
“I don’t deserve a second chance at this. I should have known.”
“I understand why you have doubts. I watched niggas finesse women from prison for years. I watched dudes come and go with the worst of intentions. Niggas who hated women. Niggas who planned the ways they would hurt the very women who held them down while they were locked up. It was woman beaters, scammers, rapists, pedophiles, murderers of women. Prison is hell. It’s a lot of devils in there.
I went through a lot, especially being so young when I went in, but I held my own.
I kept my head down, and I did my time as honorably as I could, Sloan.
I’ve got my own demons I fight from being in that place.
None of them will ever make me harm you.
Not ever!” She snuggled her face into his chest, and he lifted her chin to force eye contact.
“Not ever, Sloan,” he stressed. “I’m not like the man who killed your mom. ”
She turned to him and snuggled close as she placed one hand to the side of his face. She breathed his air, she was so close.
?°You?ˉre the man who saves women like my mom.
” She had always been attracted to Cassidy, but she was in awe of him, of his sacrifice, for the most important woman in his life…
his mother. ?°Your mom always told me and Ellie that the way a boy loves his mama reflected the way he would love a woman.
I?ˉd be so lucky if you loved me that way.
” It was like she was discovering the depth of his heart for the first time.
?°I?ˉm so sorry for ever disrespecting you with my fear.
I was so wrong about you, and a part of me always knew that I was wrong, but I was too afraid to follow my heart.
I?ˉm so sorry, baby. I hurt you, and I don?ˉt want to do that.
You’ve been hurt for too long. You were trapped for so long, Cassidy.
I want to love you so well you feel free.
You?ˉre free with me, Cassidy. I love you. ”
?°I’ve loved you from the first time I put eyes on you, Sloan.
I thought it would go away as I walked down those years, man.
I thought I would forget you. I thought I would get out, and you would be married with a family or some shit.
But none of that shit happened. I?ˉm here and you?ˉre here.
We finally in the same place and on the same page and a nigga just want you, Sloan.
I don?ˉt give a fuck about the walls you got up, or the demanding job, or none of the other difficult shit you come with.
I just want my girl. I?ˉma do my job with you.
I?ˉma love you like I?ˉm making up for lost time, Sloan. All you got to do is let me.”
He kissed the top of her head, and she wrapped her arm around his waist, resting her head on his chest. For the first time since he had been snatched away from her life, Sloan didn’t worry, she wasn’t afraid. She was safe, and he was safe, and they were together. It was a young dream fulfilled.