Chapter 17 Niko
I wasn’t sure how long I’d been lying there watching Lila sleep. Her nose scrunched up as I brushed my fingers against her cheek, feeling the heat radiating off her skin. I leaned down and kissed her forehead before getting up from the bed, making sure not to disturb her.
I made my way upstairs, my body heavy with exhaustion. The morning sun shone through the kitchen windows, filling the room with warmth. I sat down at the table and picked up my phone, dialing Vince’s number.
He answered on the second ring, his voice heavy with sleep.
“What the fuck do you want now, dickwad?” he asked.
“Good morning to you, too, Vince,” I laughed.
“I don’t have time for niceties this morning.”
“I need a favor.”
“I just did you a favor, kid.”
“Yeah, and now I need another one.”
“Got anything to do with that missing girl they’ve got all over the TV?”
“What missing girl?” I asked, already knowing the answer.
“Some Lila chick. Said she was on a trip with her friend, and when her friend woke up, she was gone.”
“I don’t know anything about that,” I lied.
“Really? Cause the girl's friend has the same name you had me get info for. Don’t think that’s a coincidence.”
“Seems it would be because I have no idea about a missing girl or anyone named Lila.”
“Whatever you say, kid,” he laughed.
“Are you gonna do me a favor or not?”
“You know my favors don’t come free,” he said darkly. “There’s always a price.”
“What’s the price?”
“Dunno. Depends on the favor.”
“I need you to find someone for me. No questions asked.”
“When do I ever ask questions? Who am I lookin’ for?”
“Steven Thatcher.”
Silence filled the phone as I waited for him to answer. My heart pounded as I heard rustling in the background, then he sighed heavily.
“Same last name as that Lila chick,” he muttered.
“No questions.”
“Wasn’t a question, just an observation.”
“No observing either, then,” I sighed.
“How soon you need it?”
“The sooner the better.”
“Alright, kid, I’ll see what I can do. We’ll talk about your payment later.”
The line went dead, and I dropped my phone onto the table, resting my head in my hands.
Lila had no idea what I was planning. I’d seen the way her eyes lit up when I told her I murdered my father. She wasn’t afraid of me, didn’t flinch away; she was jealous.
I kept replaying the words she’d said about not having it in her, but the darkness in me recognized the darkness in her, even if she didn’t want to see it herself.
It’s amazing the things you’ll do when you're face-to-face with the person who caused you pain.
No matter who they are. And I would do anything to ease that pain, even just a fraction.
No matter the cost.
After talking to Vince, I’d taken a shower and cooked breakfast. I’d opted for pancakes this time, knowing they were Lila’s favorite.
I stacked them on a plate with a large helping of butter and syrup and headed downstairs.
When I entered her room, she was already awake, her torn sweatpants lying next to the door.
“Sorry about those,” I said, nodding toward them.
She looked up at me, her full lips turned up in a smirk.
“Not like they were my favorite sweatpants or anything,” she said with a shrug.
“I’ll buy you new ones.”
I placed the tray in front of her, and her eyes lit up at the sight of the pancakes.
“My favorite,” she whispered, biting into one. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.”
I sat at the foot of the bed, watching as she devoured the plate of food, washing it down with the orange juice. She leaned against the headboard, stretching her legs out beneath the blanket.
“What’s the plan?” she asked suddenly.
“What do you mean?” I asked, confused.
“I mean… You can’t keep me in this room forever.”
“Seems to be working just fine,” I mumbled.
I’d decided earlier to tell her about Casey searching for her, even though I wasn’t sure how she’d react to that. I knew she likely wouldn’t stop looking for Lila, even if she texted her to let her know she was okay.
“For now, yeah, but it's only been, what? A few days? A week? Long term, this can’t work.”
“Do you trust me?”
She sat up in bed, the blanket moving to reveal her bare lower half.
“I don’t know, Niko,” she said, shaking her head. "I want to."
“I talked to… a friend earlier, and he said you’re all over the news,” I blurted out, feeling my chest ache as I said the words. “Casey is looking for you.”
Her eyes snapped to meet mine, pain etched into her features.
“They haven’t declared you missing yet because of the text Casey got saying you needed time and needed to get away. But, I’m guessing the circumstances might call for it sooner or later.”
She leaned back into the bed, pulling the blanket up to her chin, a single tear sliding down her cheek. I wanted to hold her, tell her that everything would be okay, but I couldn’t promise her that. Not with Casey searching for her, and not with how things were right now.
“Two days,” I said.
Her brows furrowed as she looked at me, confusion working its way through her.
“What?”
“Give me two days. After that, if you want to leave and turn me in, I’ll happily go if you want me to.”
She swallowed hard, uncertainty glaring in her eyes, before she leaned forward and nodded.
“Okay.”
I sighed and closed my eyes, feeling my heartbeat slowly return to normal.
I hadn’t slept in days. Most nights, I tossed and turned, too busy worrying about Lila, or watching her on the cameras as she slept.
My exhaustion ran deep as I leaned against the wall, my head lulling to one side.
Lila shifted on the bed and the sound of dishes clanking made my eyes snap open.
She knelt on the floor in front of me, searching through her suitcase.
When she stood, her cheeks flushed as she pulled her T-shirt down to cover herself.
“Why do you do that?” I asked.
“Do what?” she asked sheepishly.
“Try to cover yourself up like you’re embarrassed.”
She chewed on her bottom lip, tugging at the dead skin. Something vulnerable slipped across her face as I reached down and grabbed her hip, massaging the bruises that my fingers had left behind.
“Because I am embarrassed,” she muttered. “My mom was always so… thin. Even before my dad left. The one thing she always knew would upset me was telling me how fat and unattractive I am.”
I glanced down, my eyes looking over every inch of her body, when I noticed scars lining her thighs. I reached down, feeling the raised edges of them, and she gripped my wrist to stop me.
“What happened?”
“Nothing,” she said, pushing my hand away. “It doesn’t matter.”
“It matters to me.”
“It shouldn’t. It was a long time ago.”
“I want to know everything about you, Lila. Everything.”
“Thought you already did,” she said with a chuckle.
“Not everything.”
I looked up at her, feeling her shift closer to me.
She dropped her clothes on the bed and took my hands, placing them on her thighs.
Scars lined every inch of her skin from right below her hip to the middle of her thigh.
I'd missed seeing them before, but now, next to the lamplight, they stood out against her pale skin.
“Despite having Casey to talk to, I couldn’t bring myself to tell her all of it. She had such a perfect life, a perfect family, parents who loved and adored her. I was too afraid she would leave me, too.”
I ran my hands along the raised silvery lines, feeling her shiver beneath my touch.
“When things were especially bad, or I just felt… overwhelmed with everything, I’d… cut myself. And, sometimes, I’d cut so deep or so much that I’d just sit there and watch the blood run, hoping I’d bleed out.”
Something flashed in her eyes, but it was gone just as quickly as it appeared. I pulled her close, feeling her body relax into me.
“I never wanted to die,” she whispered, her voice shaking with every word, “but I didn’t want to live either.”
“And what about now?”
“Jury’s still out on that,” she laughed, wiping away tears from her cheek.
Silence filled the room as those words hung in the air, my heart aching with every breath I took. She pulled away and picked up her clothes, holding them against her chest.
“I’m gonna go shower,” she said as she turned to leave.
I fell back on the bed and slipped my hands behind my head. My palm ached, the gash from the knife throbbing and painful. My mind drifted, remembering the moment Lila came all over the knife. My cock twitched at the memory; the way she rode it burned into my mind forever.
As I lay there replaying everything in my head, my eyes began to flutter as sleep pulled at me. I rolled over, wrapping myself in her blanket, her intoxicating scent enveloping me like a warm embrace. I sank deeper into the warmth her body had left behind, my heart full and content.
I didn’t know what would happen, or what Lila would decide, but I knew I had to try to keep her. She was the best thing that had ever happened to me.
And I wouldn’t give up without a fight.