Chapter 24
TWENTY-FOUR
Playing: Waiting Room by Phoebe Bridges
I could name about a hundred different places I would rather be right now than Bensen U’s hockey arena, but here I am.
I don’t get to see my best friend that much anymore since she dropped out of school and moved out, so even if I have to freeze my ass off as well as see two knuckleheads that also happen to be my scent match’s new pack mates, so be it.
At least Stacia is right here beside me in case I need a getaway buddy.
Ciro sits on the other side of her, taking swigs of a metal canister that definitely doesn’t have water in it.
He’s offered it to me a few times, but I declined.
Last time I let Ciro give me liquor, I was caught off guard by Dax and ended up puking in a bush.
I definitely don’t want a repeat of that night.
I try and fail several times to keep my eyes off Dax and Everett as they’re warming up.
Dax watches as Kendall and Atlas send practice shots to Everett.
I think about that first time I saw them play all those months ago, when I accompanied Stacia to her first game to support her scent matches.
They played off of each other’s strengths and weaknesses, and it was that coordination that drew my eye to them to begin with.
Just as the first period is about to start, I smell the familiar remnants of woody sweetness in the air.
Jett’s amber scent fills my nose involuntarily.
I turn in the direction it’s coming from to get a bigger inhale and end up accidentally breathing it directly from the source, my face improperly posed in front of Jett’s dick as he pauses beside our aisle.
Why this fuck did I pick the aisle seat?
I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to give myself a moment of reprieve before I have to deal with the embarrassing thing I just did. But when they flutter open and I peer up at my scent match, he’s looking at me with the softest expression I’ve ever seen.
“Hey, twilight,” Jett says. His hair is pulled up in a man bun, his lean body hidden behind a t-shirt that’s definitely too thin for this arena, and his keys are attached to his belt loop.
Fuck, why is that so hot?
“What’s up, Jett?” Ciro calls over to him with a drunken grin.
He looks over and his eyebrows go up. “Oh! Hey, Ciro.”
“First hockey game, huh?”
Jett looks bashful but nods nonetheless. “Gotta do what I can to support my new pack mates, you know?”
He’s looking at me while he says this, and it’s not until after that I realize it’s the first time he’s told me about his pack mates. I can feel the panic try to appear on my face but I squash it down.
I’m already doing a really shit job at being nonchalant about this .
It’s been weird in rehearsals lately, especially since we started nightly rehearsals on Tuesday as well as our usual class on Friday.
I’ve been hesitant to speak about what happened between us, and Jett has been respectful and kept his distance outside of our scenes together.
It’s definitely affecting the way we’re acting, and I think our other classmates are starting to notice.
Nicole definitely has, because she makes a comment about it every time we’re in class.
“Yeah, you get used to it after a while. Every game starts to feel the same. Why don’t you sit with us?” Ciro gets up to move down a seat, but Stacia hits him in the arm. Her beta gives her a confused look, but I stop the interaction before it becomes awkward.
“Yeah, sit with us,” I blurt out. I gesture at Ciro to scoot down just as Stacia peers over at me with a worried question on her face.
I try to give her a casual look and shrug, mentally communicating to her that it’s okay.
Even if she doesn’t believe me, she still moves down a spot so Jett can sit beside me.
“Thanks,” Jett says to no one in particular as he settles in beside me. His scent becomes stronger, and I swallow down a pained noise as I look towards the rink, determined to avoid eye contact for as long as possible.
Ciro starts chatting with Stacia, and I continue looking forward. I can feel the heat radiating off of Jett’s thigh, the rough denim hovering over my skin like a forbidden promise.
His scent trails over me like smoke, bathing me in its entirety. Every accidental brush of our legs sends another strong surge of amber into the air.
I can’t believe there was ever a time when Jett hid his scent. It’s such a beautiful concoction; so warm, so unbelievably him . I feel sad that he felt like he had to hide it, that it reminds him of someone that he’d rather forget.
My own scent reaches out to meet his, mingling like old friends. I wince, embarrassment flooding the cranberry aroma and singeing it. I want to be a companion to my omega, but the fact that others can smell how I feel always causes my face to heat up.
I look around, wondering if anyone notices, when the slightest feather-like touch pulls me back.
My gaze goes forward as Jett’s fingers lightly ghosts over mine above the cupholder, letting the energies against our skin interact in a way that shoots goosebumps up my arm.
I refuse to look at him, because seeing his green eyes, allowing them to see how he’s sending me into a tailspin, will cause the fantasy to slip.
As long as I don’t look at him, I can allow myself this little indulgence.
His fingers finally slip through mine, and they softly close together. The energy snaps, and I feel a release flow through me… a calmness I have never known before.
We’re like our characters in the crowd at the masquerade, sneaking touches and pretending to not be as affected as we are.
“What’s happening right now?” Ciro asks, bringing me back to the present. “Rory, you’re never this quiet.”
I panic, but then realize that he can’t scent us. As a beta, he can only smell someone who is a family member or a scent match, so he’s none the wiser of the emotional turmoil that I’m in right now.
“Let’s just keep watching the game, Ci,” Stacia comments as she maneuvers his chin so he’s looking back at the rink. I breathe a sigh of relief, my skin burning as Jett squeezes my hand.
I feel like I’m going to throw up. It looks like there might actually be a reoccurrence of what happened a few weeks ago after all.
I pull my hand away as my breathing starts to pick up. My body stands up before I can process what I’m doing, and I murmur a quick apology to the others before I squeeze past Jett and bolt up the stairs and go down the first path I see.
I don’t know where I’m going, all I know is that I need to get the fuck out of here. Jett’s voice calls out behind me, and I look in every direction for a chance to evade him but end up in a dead-end hallway.
Of-fucking-course .
“Rory, please.” I hear the desperation in his voice, but all I can do is stare at the blank wall of the dead-end in front of me.
“The universe is out to get me.” I’m breathing heavily, and I’m not sure if it’s from my attempted escape or from the charade our inner beasts just tried to pull from us in the middle of a crowded arena just now.
“Please look at me,” Jett says, and even though there isn’t a single note of a bark, I find myself turning around. When our eyes meet, there’s a lot of unspoken words lying between us but I can see the weight of all of it reflected at me in his green irises.
“I’m sorry,” he starts. “And I’ve wanted to say that for a while now. I wanted to give you space, but it’s hard . It’s so fucking hard.”
“I know,” I reply, cutting him off, because it’s true. It is hard. Even though I’m so incredibly pissed off at him, I agree. It’s so hard to be away now that I know how it feels. And it’s even harder because the only other people I’ve ever felt that way with are now his fucking pack mates.
I really don’t want to tell him. I need to figure out where my head is at, and I can’t do that if they know that I know, but withholding this from them doesn’t feel like the right thing to do.
Gosh, I really wish I didn’t know.
“So, you have a pack now,” I say as I try to figure out how to tell him the truth. The statement causes his face to brighten the tiniest bit, obviously cheerful to have this new exciting thing in his life.
“Yeah, it was really unexpected. We’re looking for a place to live before next semester starts.”
The idea of all three of them building a life together, finding a home , makes me feel a little bit sick in polarizing ways.
“And guess what, one of them is the brother of Nicole ,” he tells me with disbelief.
I blanch a little bit at that and force myself not to ask which one. It’s easier than I expect because once I picture their faces, it’s clear as day.
Monaghan.
“Look, Rory.” Jett pulls me back into the present.
“I know it’s a lot right now, because you just found out about us being scent matches.
I don’t want you to feel overwhelmed so…
maybe we should focus on the play for now, on our art.
We can discuss what this means for you and me, and potentially the rest of my pack, whenever we have more time to concentrate on it. Because I know they would adore you.”
I just nod, not knowing what to say. This would be a good time to blurt it out.
I know your pack mates. I’ve slept with your pack mates.
I haven’t been able to stop thinking about your pack mates.
But the avoidant personality in me is desperately grasping at the opportunity he just handed me: more time to figure things out.
“I never thought I’d have a pack, or that I even wanted one. It’s never even crossed my mind,” he says softly, his eyes meeting mine, “but… I want you , too.”
The sentence causes something in my chest to flutter. My omega is smitten with him, but for some reason, I know the reaction to his words actually came from me .
“We can discuss it more later, definitely. Let’s just… focus on the play,” I respond.
“Cool,” he tries to say nonchalantly, but I can still see the turmoil on his face. “But I’m serious, Rory. When the play is over, I’d like for you to consider the possibility of my pack courting you.”
I almost flinch, barely containing the fear that kind of sentence elicits in me, even if it makes my omega preen. “I can only say maybe for now.”
Jett nods in understanding. “That’s as good as I deserve, to be honest.”
That has me shaking my head. “You deserve a lot, Jett. I just have a lot of emotions to sort through right now. And I’m sorry , for kicking you out like that. You definitely didn’t deserve that.”
He gives me a reassuring smile. “I understand it. This shit is scary. It feels impossible to navigate.”
I nod in agreement. Isn’t that the damn truth.
“I’ll see you at rehearsal?” he asks. When I nod, he starts to walk away.
“Hey, Jett,” I call out to him and when he turns, the question I want to ask gets stuck in my throat. I take another breath and ask, “Does your pack know about me?”
He nods, but there’s something sad about it. “They know I have a scent match, yeah.”
Then he leaves, causing my omega to whine at his absence.
I feel like I’m going crazy, this white-out hallway feeling more and more like a padded room as I watch him walk away.
My omega beckons me to move forward, call him back, but my head refuses to listen.
There’s a war of emotions going through me because I can’t seem to reason with the part of me that wants to be seen .
Dating an alpha, being courted by one, feels like giving up on my principles. But the idea of not being pursued by them hurts more than giving in, and I have no idea how to handle it.