Chapter 12 #2
They were quiet for a bit, and she didn’t know about him, but her thoughts had gone to Claire, and the tragedy that they had all been involved in, and the tragedy of Mrs. Donegan, having her husband pass away on her birthday.
She stroked the egg apron in her hand and then looked back toward the house with its wide, welcoming porch, the planters that would soon be holding beautiful, blooming flowers all summer long, and the rocking chairs that were now empty but would soon have at least one person sitting on them, enjoying the breeze from the lake and the beautiful country air all around.
“I wish Claire would come back,” she said softly.
Knowing even as she said it that most people didn’t go back.
Most people lived their lives and, at best, visited the town of their childhood once in a while.
More than likely, Claire wouldn’t come back until her grandmother passed away and she needed to clean up the house in order to sell it.
“I want to say we can’t go backward, but sometimes I feel like I just did. I gave up a good job, moved out of the suburbs, and came back to my dad. Why? It feels like I’m going backward.”
“You’re not as backward as I am. I didn’t give up a good job, I got fired.” She hadn’t meant to say that either. But she always felt comfortable with Trevor, and words slipped out. Even after they hung in the air, she didn’t regret them. It was the truth. She’d been fired.
“I’m sorry to hear that. It must have been terrible on top of your husband cheating.”
“Yeah. I was really good at my job, but when he left, it was a struggle to get out of bed, and every day, I got more and more behind. I wasn’t able to do the things that I needed to do, but I managed to stay afloat.
But when I knew for sure that I would be getting divorce papers, and we talked about splitting our assets, I just lost it.
I didn’t get out of bed for three days. Employers have a problem with stuff like that. ”
“I see. I’m sorry.”
“I guess it’s kind of like everything we’ve been talking about. I don’t know if there was a reason for me to come back here, but it really was my only choice. Maybe God will work everything out for good.”
“He promises to. That’s a promise I’ve clung to more than once. Although never to the degree that you have to right now.”
“I guess it was terrible at the time, but once I made the decision that I was going to have to move back, and I had to start cleaning out my condo, I kind of…accepted it.” That was mostly true.
She supposed she still had days where she wondered why she was going backward rather than forward.
“It was a humbling thing, you know? And I needed that. ”
“I suppose we all can use a little bit of humbling at times.”
He hadn’t given her a hard time for leaving without properly breaking up with him or even talking to him at all. Maybe he wasn’t thinking about that anymore. She’d already apologized for it, and he certainly hadn’t asked her to.
“When I left, I was arrogant. I thought I had the world by the horns. I thought I was going to be so successful by the world’s standards.
” She paused for a moment, knowing that they needed to go in.
If Mrs. Donegan was looking out the window, she had to be wondering what in the world they were doing.
She shook her head. “I thought leaving made me better. You know? I wasn’t one of those losers who stayed in this tiny hometown.
I was making something of myself in the city, because everyone knows the city’s all that.
” There was sarcasm in her voice, because she didn’t believe that now.
In fact, if anything, her excursion into the city had taught her that it was worse. Much worse.
“That’s where some good has come,” he said, and she nodded.
Time for a subject change. “Mrs. Donegan’s probably wondering what in the world is going on. We better go in.”
She didn’t really want to move. She could stand and talk to Trevor all day. Just like they’d never left each other, like he was still her best friend.
He grinned, and even that reminded her of the time they spent together. So much of it had been spent laughing. She loved that grin. Loved tracing his lips with her finger, kissing them with her own.
She couldn’t think like that. Instead, she unlatched the gate. He pushed it open and allowed her to go through first. She didn’t wait for him, but they walked single file up the walk and onto the front porch. She glanced at him as she lifted her hand and knocked on the door.
His eyes were thoughtful, almost as though he were remembering too.
Did he feel it? Feel the laughter and the pull of the happy memories?
The way they seemed to fit together, and how talking to him was easy and enjoyable.
Did he feel the same brightness deep down in his soul?
The same feeling of just being with the perfect person?
There was no white-hot, burning passion.
But rather a simple, easy, friendship-type feeling.
The idea that there could be more. That she wanted to be closer to him, that snuggling in his arms would feel like she had come home.
Even more than walking into her mother’s house and smelling the old, familiar scents that brought her childhood back in full memory.
They didn’t say anything as they waited for Mrs. Donegan to open the door. She could hear movement in the house, and though it took a while, she didn’t knock again. The older woman probably just moved slowly and needed some time to get to her door.
Eventually, the door cracked open, and Mrs. Donegan, the same yet older, stood in front of them.
Same white hair, but maybe a little bit whiter and much thinner.
The same smiling blue eyes, although more crinkles and perhaps even more deeply set in the sockets.
Same faded housedress, the same friendly smile. But older.
It reminded her that she wasn’t a little girl again. She was a woman, and she should be making more mature decisions. Maybe one of those decisions should be to reach out to her friends. Was that the mature thing to do?
“Hello. Mrs. Donegan?”
“That’s me. Are you selling something?” the lady asked, not sounding belligerent, exactly, but like she was going to send them packing if they were.
“No. Your birthday is tomorrow, and we made some things for you. But I don’t think you remember me.
I’m Grace. Grace Honea,” she said, supplying her maiden name and not her married name of Tyack.
She hadn’t considered, but she could go back to using her maiden name.
She wouldn’t mind losing the name of the man that she had married, who had betrayed her.
It wasn’t like she had children who would care.
She shook that thought away to consider later. It was the first time she had thought about it, and she didn’t want to do anything rash.
“Grace! You and Claire used to be good friends.”
“We did. And you probably remember Trevor Gillett too.”
“I do indeed. A handsome young man back in the day, and you’re still that way. Are you two back in town?”
“We are,” Trevor answered while Grace was trying to figure out how to.
She supposed his answer was correct. She didn’t know for how long.
She had just been thinking that morning that she wouldn’t be able to make a living making crafts, but…
her mother had for years. Maybe if she was careful, maybe if she worked hard, which she didn’t mind the thought of at all since she loved crafting.
It would be a dream come true to be able to make a living doing something she loved.
But what about when the thing that she loved doing became work instead of fun? Whether it was working or fun, at least she wouldn’t have a betraying, cheating scoundrel of a husband stuck to her anymore.
The thought should have made her happy, but it made her sad instead. Still, the things that Trevor and she had just talked about came to her mind, and she determined that she was going to go out of her way to look for the positive things and focus on those.
“I just moved in with my dad, and Grace just moved in with her mom. Apparently, the two of them are seeing each other.” Trevor lifted his shoulder as though saying, who knew?
“Oh my goodness. Well, that’s news!” Mrs. Donegan said, stepping back from the door as she opened it.
“Please come in. I’d love to catch up more.
My goodness, Don Gillett and Gita Honea seeing each other.
Wow. Who would have thought?” she said, shaking her head as she stood back and waited for them to walk in the house.
Grace hadn’t exactly expected to have a long, drawn-out visit, since she still had to go to the grocery store, after she checked on her mom again, but the whole point of their visit was to spend a little time with Mrs. Donegan and make her smile during a time that should be happy but might have been sad.
If they ended up spending time sitting around her table talking, that was time well spent.