44. Jackson
FORTY-FOUR
Jackson
The next morning, I wake up before my alarm, my sleep being plagued by nightmares of Blakely needing me and being all alone. Unease circles in my stomach, the need to talk to her overriding every other thought in my brain.
I reach over to the side table, grabbing my phone before my eyes are fully open, wanting to see if I missed a response from Blakely.
Nothing yet.
Calling into work, I tell the temp at the front desk that I won’t be in today, my stomach souring at the reminder that Blakely no longer works there.
Brushing the thought aside, I pick up the phone and send her a good morning text before dialing the number I’ve been avoiding for months, figuring that if Alina is here, I might as well take the time to be with her. She’s never traveled outside of Tennessee. Never been on a plane. Her coming here at all is a big step for her.
I just hope Chase stays away.
My jaw clenches at the thought of him. At the sheer audacity of him tagging along. But I won’t lie and say that part of me doesn’t want him to force his way into the time, make amends for all the ways he let me, and our friendship, down.
But I know better than to hope. If he wanted to, he would. And so far, he hasn’t.
“Good mornin’, Teeth!” Lee’s chipper, her voice like sunshine peeking through blinds, and a smile creeps on my face before I can stop myself. It’s good to hear her talk, and it’s even better not feeling old wounds bleed whenever she does.
I think my heart is mended. Now it’s another girl who’s responsible for the beats.
“Hey, sweetheart. Ready to get some Jax lovin’ in today?” I joke, falling easily into the banter that flows so effortlessly between us.
“Yes!” she squeals. Energy rushes through my body, suddenly excited to show someone from back home my neck of the woods. My mom won’t come to Cali, the memories too rough for her to relive, and it’s been lonely out here, not being able to share my present with anyone from my past.
“Okay.” I smile. “I’ll be there in an hour to pick you up.”
“I’ll be wearin’ bells and whistles.”
I open my mouth, ready to tell her not to let him tag along, but I hold back, deciding to let things play out, see if the jealousy will show the way it used to when we were kids.
But to my surprise, he stays in the hotel.
Lee hops into the passenger seat of my car, grinning from ear to ear, a short jean skirt and a The Chicks tee on her small frame, her honey hair pulled up in a giant bun.
I bounce my hand on top of it and she bats me away, scowling. “Quit that.”
“Cute.” I grin.
She kicks off her flip-flops, throwing her feet up on the dash without a care in the world. And once again, my mind is brought back to the time when Blakely did the same thing, worried that I would be upset. Apologizing for the simple act of being comfortable in a car.
My chest pulls tight, realizing that it’s nine a.m. and I still haven’t gotten a text back. I soothe my worries by telling myself it’s her first day of not having to be at Donahue Motors and maybe she’s sleeping in, catching up on time for herself after a lifetime of living for other people.
“What just happened?” Lee asks.
I side-eye her as I pull onto the street, heading back to my house. “What do you mean?”
“Your face got all wonky.”
I bite the inside of my lip. “Wonky?”
“Yeah, you know…droopy in the corners, like you just thought of somethin’ sad.” The air grows thick the longer I stay silent. “ Are you sad, Jax?”
My grip tightens on the steering wheel. “I’m actually really happy, sweetheart. I uh…I met someone.”
She squeals, the sound so harsh in the quiet of the car that my hand jerks on the wheel, making us swerve over the dotted white line.
“I knew it! Tell me everything .”
My chest warms. “Let’s get back to my place first.”
Lee nods, leaning back in her seat, a goofy smile on her face and her shoulders slightly less tense than when she first got in the car. It’s nice seeing her this way. Reminiscent of her youth, before her mom died and Chase disappeared. Before her dad became a raging alcoholic and she had to carry the weight of his secrets on her back.
It makes me miss home and makes me feel a twinge of envy for everyone who’s gotten to see her rebloom.
My phone vibrates in my pocket and at the next red light I pull it out, relief swarming every part of me when I see Blakely’s name is on the screen.
I text her back quickly, not wanting to miss my opportunity, and the tension loosens from my shoulders as we pull into my driveway and head inside.
I give Lee a brief tour, but my place is small and bare, as I’ve never really taken the time to turn this house into a home.
“So,” she says, chomping on the Doritos she grabbed from my pantry. “Tell me all about her. What’s her name?”
Sighing, I rest against the kitchen counter, snapping a hairband against my wrist, trying to figure out where the hell to start.
“You remember me telling you about Blakely?”
Her forehead scrunches. “That bratty girl you always droned on about?” Realization lights up her eyes. “You’re tellin’ me she’s the girl you’re with?”
I nod.
“Ain’t she nineteen?”
Sucking air in through my teeth, I nod again.
“Oh.” She pauses, licking her orange fingers clean before diving in to grab another chip.
My entire face screws up. “ Lee , that’s disgusting.”
Her brow furrows. “What is?”
I gesture to the bag. “You just licked your fingers and now you’re double-dipping.”
She laughs, shrugging her shoulders. “And you’re deflectin’.” She points at me. “Tell me, Mr. King of One-Night Stands, how did the girl you used to hate come to be your lovahhh. ” She draws out the word.
I chuckle, my fingers playing with the chain of my necklace. “I don’t know. It just kind of…happened. Her dad asked me to watch out for her, and when I did, I realized that she was so much more than I thought.”
“Weren’t you already babysittin’? You used to call it that all the time.” She narrows her eyes at me. “Back when we used to talk every week.”
I cringe, remembering all the times I complained about Blakely. Back then, she was just some young girl who got under my skin and pushed all my buttons. But that was before my irritation for who she pretends to be transformed into passion for who she is.
“Maybe I spoke it into existence.” I grin, moving around and reaching in the bag to grab a chip. “You once told me I’d find the everything kind of love…that it would knock me on my ass. Do you remember that?”
Her eyes gloss over as she nods, her hand coming up to rest on her heart. “Jax, are you tellin’ me you’re in love with this girl?”
Something warm and tender fills up my chest. “Yeah, sweetheart. She’s my everything . ”