9. Chapter Nine
Chapter Nine
Maeve
By the time the weekend arrives, it feels like I’ve barely had time to breathe. Roísin and I decided to head into Cork for brunch and a bit of shopping. Something light, fun, and easy.
I’m in desperate need of fun and easy in my life.
Aside from gaining another friend, I’m looking forward to doing a bit of sightseeing since I haven’t been out much since I arrived.
I’ve just finished trying to tame my curls with a brush in front of the mirror in my small hallway when I hear a light knock on my front door.
I hurry to open it and smile at my date for the day.
Roísin’s hair is swept back with a dark-red scarf tied at the nape of her neck, and the dark-blue turtleneck peeking out from underneath her black denim jacket makes her eyes pop.
“You look stunning,” I blurt.
Red tinges her cheeks and she wipes her hand on her corduroy skirt, the exact same colour as her shirt.
“Thank you.” She practically throws a to-go cup at me, the cluster of silver bracelets on her wrist letting out a jingling sound. “This is for you. I’ve got snacks in the car, just in case we need something to tide us over before we get to the café.”
“Thank you.” I take the huge takeaway cup and smile wryly at the size of it. “Question: why do you always throw coffee at me?”
She grins at me. “Because you’re too polite to say no. You’re easy”
I snort and shake my head at her. “I’m almost ready. I just need to set the alarm. Why don’t you wait in the car?”
“Sure.”
I make quick work of fetching my handbag and make sure I have my mobile in it before I grab my classic cream trenchcoat and set the alarm.
When I lock the door and turn, a gust of wind hits me square in face, causing my hair to toss and twirl wildly around my face.
A strand gets stuck on the pale pink lip gloss I’m trying out for the first time, and I swipe a finger across it to get it unstuck.
I tilt my head back and blink against the sun, my lips stretching in a wide smile at seeing the bluest sky in weeks.
I inhale deeply, breathing in the flowery scents around me, and then set off down the short path to the wooden gate.
There’s a spring in my step that I haven’t felt in a long while, and excitement flutters in my belly.
I shut the gate behind me and then skirt around Roísin’s Mini Cooper to open the door and slide inside.
After I’ve fastened my seatbelt, I let out a long sigh.
“Ready?”
I beam at her. “Ready.”
“Let’s go, then.”
She sets the car in drive and then we’re off.
After parking the car at Merchants Quay, we head to the café where Roísin has booked us a table.
It feels great being out and about with her.
She chatters a mile a minute, but even though we seem to be exact opposites, I’m enjoying her taking the lead.
I admire people who can be so open and friendly even to strangers.
We enter a lavish café with a minimalistic, Scandinavian vibe to it, but it’s welcoming and homey, despite the lush interior.
Roísin rattles off her name to the server who greets us and we’re shown to a table right by the windows where we can people-watch while enjoying our brunch.
We take off our coats and hang them on the stand at the back of the room before we sit down.
The server comes back towards us, a polite smile gracing her lips.
“Tea or coffee, ladies?” she asks.
“Coffee,” we reply in unison, and she laughs.
“Got it. I’ll bring that to you right away.”
We thank her, and I sigh. Roísin rests her elbows on the table and leans towards me.
“So, Maeve…”
My lips twitch in amusement. “Yes, Roísin?”
“Why did you move to Cloonmara?”
“You get straight to the point, don’t you?”
She preens. “Well, people always say I take after my grandmother, and you know what she’s like.”
“I’m not surprised you asked,” I admit and mirror her pose.
“I’m more surprised that you’re the first person to outright ask me.
” I tap a finger on my lips to gather my thoughts and steady my breathing.
Roísin frowns and shoots her arm out to my hand, glittery bangles jingling softly, and gives it a reassuring squeeze.
“Hey, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”
“It’s okay. I might as well rip off the band-aid.” I let out a humourless laugh. “You know that I used to work in Dublin, yeah?”
She nods vigorously. “Did you catch a lot of bad guys?”
I laugh in earnest this time. “Yes, I did. I was bloody brilliant.”
The server interrupts us and sets down coffee cups and the menus. “I’ll be back to take your order soon.”
We nod in thanks. Roísin lifts the coffee pot and pours my cup. “Go on.”
I open my mouth, the words on the tip of my tongue, ready to blurt out the truth.
My psychologist has told me repeatedly that I have to open up about my injury, but now that the time’s come, a tight vice is clutching at my insides.
I can’t say the words. But I don’t want to lie to Roísin, either.
Not when she’s making such an effort to be my friend.
Instead, I choose my words carefully.
“I got hurt while on duty, and I had to take a long leave of absence because of it.”
“How bad was it?” she prompts.
“Pretty bad,” I whisper around the lump in my throat.
“I was in hospital for a few weeks and still have both the mental and physical scars to carry with me every single day. My boss thought a change of scenery when I got back would be best for me, so when this job came up, I applied for a transfer.” My nose stings, and I sniffle as tears well up in my eyes.
“One day, I’ll tell you the full story, but can we leave it for now? Please?”
“Of course.”
“Thank you.”
She lets go of my hand and leans back. I glance out the window and count silently to twenty to get the tears under control. Once the knot in my stomach disappears, I glance back at Roísin. There’s a softness and understanding in her eyes that chases the final tension away.
“I’m glad we came out today.”
“So am I.” She takes her mug in both hands and raises it in a silent toast. “Now, let’s talk about something else.”
I raise my mug and take a careful sip. “Agreed.”
“We can talk about me if you want?”
“Please. What made you return to Cloonmara?”
She lets out a pfft sound. “Oh, that one’s easy. I came back for Nan’s sake because she’s getting on in years and refuses to let anybody help her.” She winks at me. “So, since my parents and five brothers…”
“Five brothers?!” I whisper-yell.
“You heard me. When none of them felt they could leave their busy lives to come back here, I thought, bollocks, I’ll do it. That was…” She closes her eyes for a few seconds, then pops them wide open again, “about a year ago now.”
“I remember you told me that.”
“Nan is too proud to make a fuss, but she really does need my help, and I like being close to her.” She takes a deep breath and groans. “But I wish she’d stop trying to set me up with random blokes on dating apps.”
I laugh. “Oh, my gosh. She does that?”
“Uh-uh.” She giggles. “It’s horrendous and hilarious at the same time.”
I shake my head in wonder. Wonder and a little envy that she can laugh off her Nan’s match-making attempts.
“You have a fantastic relationship. I don’t think I’d take it as well as you do.”
“We do.”
“Did you open the bakery right after you came back?”
“Almost, yes. I needed to stay close to her, and when the old baker retired, I bought the shop for a bargain price. I live in the flat atop it. It’s small, but it’s enough for now.
I’m saving up for my own cottage, but it’ll take me a bit longer to get there.
” She shrugs. “I’m not in a hurry, but it’s on my five-year-plan. ”
“I’m impressed.”
The server arrives to take our order, and once she leaves, I relax in my seat.
“I love your bakery.” I smile warmly at my new friend.
Roísin squares her shoulders. “Thank you. I want it to be more than a bakery, though. I’d love to have more than baked goods and sandwiches.” Her eyes light up. “Maybe partner with a bookshop or an arts and crafts shop during tourist season.”
“That would be fantastic. Books are my happy place, but I’d love to learn how to make my own ceramic mugs or bowls, too. You know, take a course and then book a station every once in a while, and purchase the materials I use whenever I’m there. Something like that, anyway.”
“Oh, I love this. Wait, I need to write all this down.” She turns around to rummage in her handbag and pulls out her mobile.
“You’re brilliant, you know that? I didn’t know I needed a brainstorming buddy, but this is perfect.
” Her thumbs tap in quick succession. “Might be good to change things up a bit depending on the season, but we’ll see. ”
“We?”
She nods, her focus still on the phone. “Of course. We’ll need more of these brainstorming sessions, too.”
Warmth settles inside me, genuinely pleased to help her.
But I’m happy for my own sake as well, and for the first time in a long time, I stop feeling unsettled and anxious.
I might end up getting good at this friendship thing, after all.
Even though the future looked a little lonely and uncertain mere days ago, spending the day with Roísin is proving to be much more relaxed and simpler than I’d bargained for.
Perhaps it’s finally happening.
I’m settling, slow and steady, and it’s not that frightening. If anything, it’s effortless.
Just like I’ve hoped for all my life.
We spend the next few hours enjoying the warm weather, wandering around the city centre and sightseeing.
On our way back from visiting Blarney Castle and Gardens, we head towards the English Market.
The skin on the back of my neck prickles, and a shiver runs down my spine.
I turn my head, scanning the crowds behind us, but I don’t catch anything out of the ordinary, only a bus full of visitors walking in the same direction as us.
Still, I stop, unable to shake the feeling that something’s off.
“What’s up?” Roísin places a hand on my arm.
“I’m not sure,” I murmur. I try to shrug off the strange sensation. “Nothing.” I rub my forehead. “Probably just my instincts running wild.”
“Well, it must be hard to switch them off.” Her brows knit, and she looks down at her feet as we start walking again. “I suppose you’re never off duty, are you?”
“No, not really. But I don’t mind it. I like knowing that I can help if someone needs it, and always paying attention to my surroundings means that no one is alone if they find themselves in a situation they can’t get away from.”
Roísin loops her arm through mine, and we walk in silence for a bit. “Don’t you get scared?”
I move my head from side to side. “It’s not something I think about. Besides, I’m not always out, trying to catch the bad guys. Most of the time, I’m behind a desk doing a bunch of paperwork.”
It’s not the whole truth, but I’m not sure I’m ready to divulge everything to my new friend.
“Hmm. But what about your family? Don’t they worry about you?”
I shake my head. “I don’t have any family.”
She blinks. “None?”
I shake my head. Her reaction is one I must’ve seen a thousand times, but it doesn’t sting or leave me vulnerable anymore. I’ve grown used to it. “I grew up in foster care.”
“Was it bad?”
I shrug. “It is what it is. I was one of the lucky ones. I stayed with the same family for almost a decade, so at least I had some stability. Others weren’t that lucky.
” I open my mouth, hesitating but dig deep to find my courage and soldier on.
“I keep in touch with my foster parents, Nellie and Jack, though, so I’m not completely alone. ”
“Right.” She bumps her shoulder with mine. “So, no one special in your life like a boyfriend?”
I let out a wry laugh. “Not anymore. I’ve been single since I left Dublin.”
“Okay.” She bites her lip, surprising me with the note of vulnerability shining in her eyes.
“I’ve never really had girls who were my friends.
Mostly, I played with the boys at school, and being the youngest at home meant there was always one of my brothers to play with.
By the time I hit puberty, I didn’t really know how to befriend girls my age, so I thought it’d be easier sticking with being a tomboy. ”
I repeat her motion, trying to show her I appreciate her opening up to me.
“I’m glad you’re a pushy, straight-to-the-point girl who forces your delicious, caffeinated beverages on me several times a week,” I tease.
She chuckles. “Thanks. I’d say this friendship is off to a good start.”
“I agree wholeheartedly.”
We share knowing grins.
“Let’s go shopping.” Roísin points to the English Market in front of us. “This market has survived famines and wars, and you can’t visit Cork without stopping here.”
“Lead the way, then.”
As Roísin shows me one stall after the next that holds variations of delights and delicacies, another shard of my heart slides into place and mends one of the cracks that I’ve felt most of my life.
I’m not altogether sure what it means in the long run, or if Cloonmara is the right place for me, but I’m going to try not to question everything too much.
Instead, I’m resolved to attempt to live a simpler life for once.
To live in the moment and relish the budding friendship between me and Roísin and let it grow at its own pace.
I may not be good at living in the moment, but I’ll never know if I can do it unless I try.