27. Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Maeve
“Mae? Wake up.”
I groan at the voice and pull the duvet over my head. The low, manly chuckle sends warmth running down my back to settle in my tummy, but wait…why is there a man in my bedroom?
I feel a hand on my shoulder shaking me a little bit, and I flip the cover back and scrunch my nose.
“Go away.”
“You’re cute when you’re half-asleep.”
Wait, is that Aidan?
The events of the night come rushing back with a vengeance, and with each second that passes, my mind slides every piece of memory back into its right slot, and I remember everything.
Aidan tucked me into bed.
Aidan gave me water during the night.
Aidan curled our fingers together, and I fell asleep soon after.
Or did I do that?
I blink my eyes open to find him leaning over me, his hands on either side of my head, his forearms resting on my pillow.
His eyes crinkle at the corners, the warmth seeping through my bones like a blanket.
I try to turn my head so as not to send a puff of my morning breath straight at him, but he’s caged me in so well that there’s not much room for me to turn away.
I pull the blanket up to cover my lips instead.
That only results in his grin growing wider.
“Good morning,” I murmur.
“Morning. How are you feeling?”
I shrug. “I’m okay. Parched.”
“I brought some more water. Drink up and then take a shower. I’ll go downstairs and make us breakfast.”
My eyes grow round as saucers.
“Erm, what?”
He flashes his dimples at me.
“You heard me. Mum brought eggs and bacon, if you’re up for that.”
I gasp.
“What? Your mother came here with food?”
He rolls his eyes at me.
“Don’t worry, she doesn’t think we’re married or anything. She just wanted to help take care of you.”
I frown.
“Why would she do that? She doesn’t even know me.”
He shakes his head and leans closer, our noses almost touching.
“She’d do the same for anyone in the village who had the biggest cottage in the county but with a pantry as empty as yours.”
I huff and flip the covers away, forcing him to give me more room.
“I forgot to do my food shopping the other day because I was a little bit under the weather. I just wanted to get home and rest. Food was the last thing on my mind.”
He presses his lips together in a tight line, but then nods.
“Fine. I understand.” Then he surprises me for the millionth time today and leans down to swipe his mouth on top of mine in a kiss as soft as butterfly wings. “Shower. Now. Then come down and get breakfast. Don’t make me come up here to fetch you.”
With that, he pushes off and away from me, and before I can pick up my scattered brain that seems to lie in a thousand pieces on the floor, he’s left me alone in my room.
What. Was. That?
I feel a warm tug in my lower body and huff out a breath in disbelief.
Mildly grouchy and bossy Aidan is turning me on even when I’ve been sick for the past twenty-four hours.
But the problem is that I don’t only want to jump him and have wild sex with him.
He stayed the night, and he took care of me because he didn’t want to leave me when I had no one else.
He’s getting closer, weakening my resolve to keep him out of my heart, and I can’t let him get closer than he already is. Even if my feelings continue to grow, I still don’t know if Cloonmara is the right place for me.
And that’s what scares me the most. That I’ll end up caring too much when I don’t even know if I want to stay here.
But I can’t tell him that.
I don’t know how.
Aidan is the type of man I could so easily fall in love with if I let myself.
The thought terrifies me, but I don’t know what to do with it.
I shake my head and stretch, my limbs cracking and crunching like an old woman. When my stomach lets out a long growl, letting me know it’s been too long since I fed it, I toss the cover away, and on shaky legs and with a running nose, I walk into the bathroom to do as he says.
I wrap the towel around my hair and walk downstairs, the scent of bacon making my mouth water.
I meant to dry it, but I’m so hungry that I couldn’t go without food for much longer.
I’ve changed into my most comfortable but still fairly feminine pyjamas, a royal-blue satin set, but I put on a new pair of fuzzy socks.
When I turn the corner and catch Aidan on the phone, I tiptoe next to him and walk to the bar where two steaming mugs of coffee are lined up. Aidan points at the beige cup with illustrations of cherries scattered here and there on top of it, and I take it as my sign that it’s meant for me.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, love. I’m glad you didn’t fall from your horse yesterday.”
I smile over the rim of the cup.
“Have fun. Bye.”
I blow softly on the hot coffee, take a careful sip, and sit on the chair next to the bar. Aidan’s eyes seem to follow my every move, and I try not to shiver at the intense stare, not used to being scrutinised so carefully.
“How are you feeling?”
“Not too bad.” I shrug. “Just a little sore, and I’ve got a cold and a headache, but I’ll manage.”
“That’s good. You look better.”
“Thank you.”
He turns back to the stove and grabs a couple of paper napkins, puts them on a plate next to him, and then scrapes the bacon from the pan, letting the grease drip off.
“Please thank your mum for the food from me.”
“I will.”
I watch him lift another pan filled with a mountain of scrambled eggs to a bowl that matches my coffee cup, and I almost moan from the sight of it.
He turns around and puts plates and forks in the middle of the kitchen island, then goes back to fetch another plate with toast. He walks around me, his fingertips sliding across my lower back, and fetches the butter box from the fridge along with a jar of strawberry jam from his farm.
What a feast.
I bite my lip.
“What would you have done if I were a vegetarian?”
He narrows his eyes, his coffee mug raised halfway to his mouth.
“I’d have to punish you if you were.” He takes a sip, his lips pulling up in a knowing smile.
My lips twitch and I blink innocently at him, trying to keep a straight face, even though his words send a rush of warmth through me.
“Really?” I reach for some bacon and pop a piece into my mouth. “And why do you think I’d let you do that?”
“I just have a feeling that you’d like it.”
I crunch the bacon and swallow, then pull the bowl with eggs closer to me. Aidan rounds the island and pulls out the barstool next to mine, putting his hand on the lower part of my back as he sits down.
We eat in silence for a couple of minutes, and even though it should be awkward, having him in my cottage without us having sex, it feels effortless…intimate.
I glance up to find him staring intently at my feet, a crooked smile on his lips . I tap my toes on the lower part of the barstool.
“I like your socks.”
“Thank you. Franny knitted them and gave them to me as a thank you present.”
His eyes crinkle at the corners. “What did you do?”
“I shared some of Roísin’s baked goods with her and her knitting club weeks back.” I wave a hand. “It was nothing.”
He leans closer, his eyes flickering down to my mouth. “Look at you, putting down roots.”
I lick a crumb away and try to ignore his breath hitching. Instead, I need to bring us back from the edge that we seem to have gotten closer to, despite my best intentions to keep us away from it.
I rub my hands on my legs. “Thank you again for staying with me.”
“You’re not upset?”
“No. Why would I be?”
“Because you made a list of rules, and I just broke two of them.”
“Oh. That.” I blow out a long breath. “I think I’m okay with you breaking the rules just this once.”
“So, we’re good? No hearts involved, right?”
“Oh, no.” I shake my head, my pulse racing from the intensity in his eyes. “I mean, I’m starting to really like you, or I wouldn’t let you give me so many orgasms, but…”
“Right. And I feel the same way about you. But there’s no danger of me going beyond the I like you stage.”
I shake my head. “Pfft. Definitely not.”
His smile falters, and my cheeks turn pink.
I put a hand up to try and hold the towel in place when it starts slipping, but it’s too late, and it falls to the floor, my hair falling wildly around me.
I gather it in a low bun and pull a band from around my wrist to tie it with, but Aidan’s hand on my thigh stops me.
“I’ll take care of it.”
I open my mouth to ask what he means, but he’s already pushed away and jumped from the chair.
He slides his fingers through the wilderness that is my hair and combs his fingers through it.
I worry my lips between my teeth, my back ramrod straight, and take a deep breath in an attempt to ease the tension.
“You’re strung so tight, Mae. Relax.”
“I’ll relax if you swear that you know what you’re doing.”
“I used to braid Katie’s hair all the time,” he murmurs. “Trust me.”
I close my eyes and try to do as he says, still breathing deeply, but the moment is fast becoming too much. It’s too intimate. He’s too close.
“Tell me about Tierney,” I whisper.
His hands still in my hair, and I hold my breath, waiting. He braids my hair again, surprising me.
“What do you want to know?”
I shrug.
“Anything you want to tell me.”
He doesn’t say anything for the longest time.
“She was a journalist. Grew up here, but she lived in Cork at the time, and we met when she was here to write a piece about the Cloonmara Spring Festival. It was only the second year we’d held it, and we needed publicity.
The town held a meeting about how we could bring in a journalist, and lucky for us, her brother, Niall, convinced her to come home for a while to write it.
” He sighs on a low chuckle. “We met up at the pub, started chatting. I couldn’t believe that the little thing I’d seen around the village when we grew up had grown into such an interesting, beautiful woman.
One who knew what she wanted. She went home with me that night. ”
I smile softly. “You fell hard for each other?”
“Yeah. We did. She was a spitfire, always on to the next story, but she was also a big fan of staying home when her social battery was used up. She was kind. Not a hounding type of journalist who sticks their nose where they don’t belong.
She respected people, and she treated everyone equally.
I loved that about her. I ended up going to Cork every weekend, and I proposed six months after. ”
“What?” I gasp. “Really?”
“Yup. I was madly in love from the moment I saw her, and I knew I wanted to spend my life with her.”
“Wow. And she said yes?”
He chuckles.
“Actually, no. She turned me down.”
“But you stayed together.”
“Yeah. In the end, it took me another year courting her, and she finally gave in. We got married right here on the beach, and then she got pregnant…”
My stomach flips when he grows silent, lost in the memories.
“Hair tie.”
I loosen it from around my wrist and lift my arm, the hair tie dangling between my fingers. He takes it, and I feel the slow tugs at the end of my hair as he tightens it.
“There.”
I reach behind me and catch his hand in mine before he has the chance to pull away.
“Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.”
We both know it’s for more than braiding my hair.
Still holding on to his hand, I pull it to my front and rest it on my chest. His strong front settles behind me, and I rest my head on his chest and close my eyes for a moment.
Heat spreads in my cheeks, and warmth settles around my heart that this man–my friend–trusts me so much that he shared his broken heart with me.
“I think I need a nap.” I sigh.
He presses his lips on top of my head and steps away.
“Go up and rest. I’ll clean up, and then I need to get to the farm. I’ll check in with you later.”
I open my eyes and lean forward, releasing his arms, and turn my head, seeking out his eyes. The sadness in them sends me reeling. I wish I could take away his pain.
“You don’t have to do that.”
He frowns at me. “Why not?”
I avoid his probing gaze and take a sip of coffee, buying time. “It’s just a little weird.”
“I’m not allowed to check in with you just because we’re fuck buddies?”
I wince.
“No, it’s…” I stop talking and rub my temples, because what do I say? I scramble for the right words without hinting that I’m scared.
I feel his thumb on my chin, pressing my face up, and I give in and raise my head, because how can I not? My heart slams into my throat from the intense stare in his stormy, grey eyes, swimming with a heat I haven’t seen before.
“I can’t…” He wets his lips. “I can’t not care about you, Mae. You need to let me in, just a little bit, and relax. I’m a grown man, and, apparently, it’s not in my nature not to care, even just a little bit, for the woman I sleep with and, fuck it, can’t stop thinking about.”
His thumb sweeps across my lips, down my throat, until he stops.
He circles my neck, his skin on mine caressing me in slow circles, enough to turn my busy brain to mush.
I bite my lip when he puts a little pressure on my windpipe, and something deliciously dark, primal even, settles between my legs.
He takes a step closer and I widen my legs, inviting him to come as close as he wants.
His nostrils flare at the invitation, and I sigh as he drinks me in.
“Do you understand? We fuck, yes, but we care for each other. You lean on me when you need me. I’m here for you.”
“You’re bending the rules. Again,” I breathe.
His lips pull up in a smirk.
“Rules need to be broken sometimes.” His face inches closer until our lips are only a hair’s breadth away. “Especially by good girls like yourself who always play by them,” he growls. “I think you need that, and that I’m the only one who can help you. Don’t you?”
He doesn’t wait for my answer but gives me a hard kiss that’s over before it begins. He groans, then releases me and takes a step away.
“Now, go upstairs before I change my mind and fuck you right here before you’re well enough for me to take you like you want me to.”
I widen my eyes and glance at the bulge in his jeans. He reaches down and rubs at it, teasing me. The ache between my legs intensifies, but I know he’s right.
I’m not well enough for the rough ride I want.
Instead, I hop down from the barstool and turn my back to him, being the good girl that I can’t stop being for him.