50 - Fallon
~ 50 ~
FALLON
“Are you kidding me?”
I swore the words with the same level of disbelief as a small child walking in on seeing Santa Claus. Which, by the looks of Blaine’s outfit, wasn’t that far off.
“Hello, Fallon.”
He stood in a suit — but not just any suit. It was a weird, off-color red, split by a bright green, Christmas tree tie. I couldn’t believe he was standing on our front porch at all, much less standing there holding a present.
“Blaine!” I practically screamed. “What the fuck? ”
“May I come in?”
“No you can’t come in!” I spat, shaking my head in incredulity. “You shouldn’t even be here at all. In fact—”
“Please, Fallon,” he said. “Let me talk.”
For the first time in his vain, pretentious life he actually sounded humble. It took me off guard, actually. Just long enough for him to start talking.
“I want you to have this,” he said, sounding overly nervous.
He extended one hand, holding the present out before me in his palm. In response, I folded my arms tightly across my chest.
“What is it?”
“It’s something you’ve had before,” Blaine said cryptically. “Something I should’ve never taken away, because you absolutely deserve it.” He coughed, and cleared his throat. “You’ve always deserved it.”
The present was small — no bigger than my fist. I wanted to hurl it as far away from me as I possibly could. Which, judging by its size, would be pretty fucking far.
“Blaine, I don’t need anything from you,” I told him. “Now if you’ll kindly fuck the hell off—”
“Please Fallon,” he implored. “Just… just open it.”
I had to admit I was curious. The package was wrapped with a small ribbon and a tiny bow, and by the looks of it, certainly not by him. It occurred to me that it was the exact size and shape of… well…
“No,” I swore, shaking my head. “No, you wouldn’t. ”
Blaine tilted his head curiously. “Wouldn’t what?”
“You’re not on one knee,” I blurted. “Then again, someone like you wouldn’t get on his knee at all, if he were going to… going to…”
Something made me pluck the small present from his outstretched hand. I took it in my palm, opened it, and stared down in disbelief.
“A key?”
“The key to the house,” Blaine beamed proudly.
The key was identical to the one I’d given back to him when I left the house. Only this one had a little red ribbon through it.
“Why the hell would you—”
“Because I want you back, Fallon,” he said genuinely. “Scratch that. I need you back. I made a big mistake.”
I laughed. It was all I could do.
“Actually a huge mistake,” Blaine reiterated. “The biggest mistake of my life.”
Sweat was forming on his brow, all along his impeccably manicured hairline. It could’ve been anxiety, but Blaine was never anxious. It was probably the stupid suit.
“Take the key,” he urged. “Move back in. Things will be just like they used to be…”
“Just like they used to be?” I scoffed. “You think that’s going to sweeten the deal?”
“Uhhh… that’s not what I meant,” he backtracked. “Things will be amazing, then. Like they were before. You know, in the beginning.”
“Things were never amazing,” I shot back. “And in the beginning I was an idiot.”
“You’re not an idiot,” Blaine argued. “You’re perfect. I see that now.”
I rolled my eyes. “Glad we agree on something.”
“So perfect that I realized my mistake,” he went on. “And so I broke it off with Bailey…”
“You mean she broke up with you ,” I countered.
“What?”
“C’mon Blaine,” I smirked. “If you can’t be honest with me, at least be honest with yourself. I was the only one who could even marginally tolerate you. You’re finally realizing this, and that’s why you’re here.”
“Fallon—”
The door suddenly swung open behind me, and I saw Blaine’s eyes shoot upward. His gaze shifted left, right and center; a sure indication all three of my lovers were standing behind me.
“And what do we have here?” I heard Emerson say.
“Pizza guy?” Trey said hopefully.
I looked Blaine over and sighed. “Oh, nothing. Nobody, really.”
A few seconds of awkward silence stretched out, during which our guest shifted uncomfortably. Dalton scoffed.
“This is Blake, isn’t it?”
“Blaine, not Blake,” my ex-boyfriend swore under his breath. There was disdain in the correction.
“Whatever, man,” spat Dalton. “Why’s he dressed like this?”
The boys behind me laughed. Blaine shifted some more.
“Is he colorblind?” Trey interjected.
“No,” I replied glibly. “But he’s blind to just about everything else.”
“He must be going to an ugly suit party, then,” Emerson reasoned. “Like one of those ugly Christmas sweater parties, but—”
“This suit is a Tom Ford ,” Blaine swore in disgust.
“That suit is a travesty,” Trey returned. “It’s… well… is that purple?”
“Magenta,” Blaine coughed.
“It’s maroon, at best,” said Dalton. “But it’s hideous.”
“He looks like a magician,” laughed Emerson. “Can you do magic? Did that outfit come with a wand?”
Blaine’s face turned pink, then red, then almost violet. If it kept going, it would eventually match the color of his suit.
“Are you on your way to a children’s party?” asked Trey. “Do you need directions?”
“No and no,” Blaine said firmly. “I—”
“Then why the fuck are you on our porch?”
The guys all stopped talking at once, waiting on an actual answer. In the ensuing silence, Blaine squirmed.
“I came here for Fallon,” he said finally. “To take her home.”
Somewhere behind me, I felt the boys shift forward menacingly.
“Home?”
“Yes, home,” said Blaine, his voice growing angry. “Fallon and I have been together for years. She’s not yours, she belongs with me.”
I reached backward with both arms, steadying them, holding the guys back.
“Blaine, this is my home,” I growled. “And I was never yours.”
“Oh, so you’re with one of them now?” he sneered. “The football team?”
The contempt in his voice was palpable now. I knew it was as much for me, as it was for them.
“Who is it?” Blaine demanded. “Which one of you—”
“Who says it’s just one of us?” Trey laughed, stepping forward.
The guys pushed past my outstretched arms as if they were tissue paper. I let them drop helplessly to my sides.
“I… I uh…”
Trey’s arm was already around my waist, but now Dalton’s was too. And Emerson’s hand had somehow found its way to my ass, in full view of my asshole ex-boyfriend. He squeezed possessively, and Blaine’s eyes nearly popped out of his head.
“You really think you’ll be able to make her happy?” asked Dalton. “Offer her the same things we do?”
Blaine’s expression was priceless. I saw his Adam’s apple bob slowly up and down.
“ All the same things?” said Emerson, adding a suggestive wink.
I stared down at my ex-boyfriend, focusing on those eternally judgmental eyes. I watched them shift from one man to the other, looking for the joke. Sensing none, he took a step backward.
“That can’t be the case though now, can it?” I asked Blaine. “After all, I’m ‘sexually vanilla.’”
I shifted my hips, and the guys closed in on either side of me. Their hands lingered in places that were much more than just friendly.
“You should probably leave now,” I said, thrusting the gift box with the key back into Blaine’s limp hand.
“Yeah,” Trey muttered. “Before you pull a rabbit out of your hat or something.”
Blaine cleared his throat, but said nothing more. By now, all the fight had gone out of him. With his shoulders slumped in defeat, he suddenly looked very small and insignificant. As he stepped from the porch and retraced his steps down the walkway, I found myself wondering how I ever dated him in the first place. Much less let him rule my life for so many years.
With their arms still around me, the boys ushered me back into the house. The door closed, and I opened my mouth… but Dalton’s finger was already shushing it.
“Go upstairs and pack,” he said, obliterating anything I might’ve been prepared to say. “We’re taking you away for the weekend.”
All thoughts of Blaine flew out the window, and probably for the last time.
“Y—You are?” I asked excitedly.
The boys nodded, grinning. I was thrilled to see their expressions were just as eager as mine.
“Where?”
“Never mind where,” said Trey. “But pack heavy.”
“Maybe bring your Ohio clothes,” added Emerson.
“Definitely bring your Ohio clothes,” Dalton agreed. “But also bring skimpy stuff too.”
“Tiny panties,” Trey noted. “A bathing suit.”
“My Ohio clothes and a bathing suit?” I squinted.
“She’s not going to need a bathing suit,” said Emerson.
“She’s not going to need panties, either,” Dalton grinned. He kissed me before turning me in the direction of the stairs. “But pack them anyway. You look fantastic in them.”