Chapter 22 - Emily #2
“No!” I snap. “You don’t understand!” I bellow at him, throwing my hands up in defeat as something inside me cracks open, splitting with the images of what I’ve been seeing in those nightmares and visions that have been haunting me.
“I know we have to go through with this. We’ve been preparing for months, and now I’m here, the last witch in this prophecy to take down Merlin Grimes, and I—” My voice cracks, and I shake my head fervently and tear my gaze from his eyes.
“I don’t know if I can do it. I don’t know if I can go through with it. I’m afraid.”
“Afraid of what, Em? I don’t understand.” Sean shakes his head as he takes a step toward me, but I put up a defensive hand to stop him, noting what a stark contrast this moment is to what it was like between us when we got entangled in a mating ceremony.
Back then, I wanted nothing to do with him because I’d been clinging to the past so tightly, and couldn’t accept him being anywhere near me. Now, I’m pulling away because I’m afraid of what happens when I go through with using my powers against the evil witches, against Grimes himself.
What if I fail? What if something goes wrong and Sean pays the price? I’m putting up walls to protect us both this time, and I can barely explain it to him. He hasn’t seen what I saw. He doesn’t understand what it’s like to watch the person you love dying in front of your eyes.
I turn my back to him, hugging my arms across my chest as if craving comfort that can only be found in his arms. But I’m too afraid to ask. Too afraid that I’ll turn to mush in his arms and forget that we’re both in danger here.
“You won’t understand, Sean,” I whisper, my voice hoarse and dry as I fight back a sob. “It’s too much pressure. For both of us. I feel like I’m responsible for your life, and I don’t want to be. If something happens to you—”
“Nothing will happen to me,” he cuts in, and I snap around on him with a fiery glare through the haze of my tears.
“You don’t know that!” I snap. “No one knows what happens, but I’ve seen it! I’ve had a vision of the future, Sean, and in it, you die!”
Sean remains calm and composed, as if that bit of information doesn’t bother him at all.
“Emily…it’s not set in stone,” he says, shaking his head softly as he cautiously reaches out toward me.
I flinch, only because I’m terrified of feeling his touch when it’s just a reminder of a bond that is tied to destruction.
“Delilah always says that visions aren’t set in stone,” he says, more gently this time. “What you’ve been seeing is just what the Harrower wants you to see. She’s playing on your worst fears, messing with you just so you back down.”
“But you and I both know that if I fail, you die!” I argue. “For whatever twisted plan we’re part of, my powers are linked to this bond. They’re linked to our lives. And I can’t afford to fail. You die if I do. I won’t be able to save you!”
Sean lets out a steady breath through his nostrils. “I don’t need you to save me, Emily. I need you to fight beside me.”
Something in me cracks, and my knees weaken as a sob rips from my throat.
Sean’s arms are around me in an instant, holding me up, keeping me steady, keeping me grounded as he always does, reminding me of the sheer magnitude of our mate bond.
It’s unlike anything we’ve ever heard about, and I hate that it had to be us.
At the same time, I wouldn’t dream of having anything besides this—his arms around me so protectively, allowing me to feel the most powerful as my magic stirs.
“I’m sorry!” I sob into his chest, grabbing fistfuls of his sweatshirt. “I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you! I’m sorry that I made you feel like I didn’t want you! It’s not true! I do want you, Sean! I do want you!”
I can feel his relief washing over both of us, hugging us like a bubble only we can feel. Lifting my face to meet his eyes, I notice my magic pulsing around us like a protective shield of gold.
And the moment I meet Sean’s ocean-blue eyes, a realization hits me like an epiphany from the heavens.
“You don’t have to apologize,” he begins softly, his voice as tender as ever. “You did nothing wrong—”
I press a finger to his lips to stop him, my heart pounding against my ribcage. I can feel my magic curling from the pit of my belly and blooming into my heart.
“I’ve been wrong this whole time, Sean. I’ve been pushing you away, when Goddess knows I have wanted you more than anything.”
Sean’s breath catches audibly, and in his eyes, I see my own reflected back to me. It’s like my decision has changed something inside me, and it shows in the luminescent golden glow of my eyes.
“I am ready to fight beside you, to fight with you, Sean,” I declare, the words cementing the magic into every atom in my body. I can feel pulsing, radiating, like a heat wave settling in from my core. “I want us to fight together.”
Sean’s eyes glow with the reflection of my golden eyes bouncing off his orbs, a smirk curling his lips as he cups my face and leans in.
“You have no idea how beautiful, how magnificent you are right now, angel,” he whispers, his breath hot against my lips.
I close a little distance between our faces, batting my eyes seductively at him. “Now that’s a name I could get used to,” I tease, and Sean returns the favor by leaning in further and ghosting his lips across mine.
“There’s something else you’re gonna have to get used to, angel…” he drawls, his hand sliding to the back of my head.
“Hm? What’s that?”
He holds my head firmly, staring deeply into my eyes when he says, “How impossibly ravenous I am for you. It’s a hunger that never dies.”
“Then don’t let it,” I return, and crush my lips to his while the fire that burns between us lights up in ribbons of gold.