Chapter 46
KAT
“So where is this dress?” I ask Emerson as I stand in a pink satin robe looking like I’m getting ready to walk down the aisle rather than accept an award at a charity gala. She’s already donned a shimmering black, floor-length gown that’s absolutely stunning on her.
“Ta-da!” she says with a flourish, unzipping a garment bag to reveal a stunning red dress. Every single emotion I’m feeling must show on my face because she narrows her eyes at me. “No, this is not too much. This is a power dress. It says look at me; I’m a badass and I own every room I walk into.”
“Is that all it says?” I ask wryly, her posture exuding a level of self-assurance I can only hope to achieve one day.
“No,” she muses as her red lips curl up in a devilish smirk, “it says poor Oakey is going to lose his mind all night seeing you in this.”
“Did he say…”
She snorts out a laugh as she drapes the bag over the cream-colored chair. “I have known Tom a long time and exactly once has he reached out to make arrangements for a female client to feel pretty, empowered, and then bought a dress for her.”
“But—”
“I’m positive he’ll love your ass in this dress.”
“Emerson!” I hiss and she laughs, gently gripping my arms and shaking me.
“I’ve never seen him so happy, Kat. He’s guarded and serious and yes, he loves me and Isla and our family and Royce, obviously, but only because we bullied him into it. He took one look at you and thought, ‘That woman is something special and I want her by my side.’”
Looking up at the ornate chandelier, I blink back the tears that want to fall.
I just had my makeup done.
“Remind me to ask you for the motivational speech before we get ready next time.”
“Yes, well, that’s probably a good idea.” She fans my face with her hands, the gesture making me snicker. “Are you always this emotional?”
She means it teasingly, but I feel the words ricochet through me, hitting every nerve and insecurity as they go.
“Sadly, I’m not used to people being this nice to me.”
She opens her mouth and then closes it, silently removing my dress from the bag and looping the hanger over the hook on the wall.
“I think we all try to protect ourselves from the outside world. There’s an impossible number of variables that dictates how our day goes, and we have to decide which ones we’re going to take to heart and which ones don’t deserve our time.”
“How do you do it?”
“By remembering I’m fabulous.” She grins but I can see the fire in her eyes.
“I’ve earned my seat at the table. My life is fast-paced and I work long hours, but I make time to recharge a priority.
I don’t give a shit if anyone thinks my skirt is too short, and I don’t make myself smaller to fit anyone else’s narrative.
I’ll be the villain in their story because I know damn well they don’t have a page in mine. ”
I gape at her, knowing I’ve never had that kind of confidence.
But I can try—more than try.
Because I haven’t been the main character in my own life, and it’s time to change that.
Right now.
In the dress that Tom picked out because he knew before I did the kind of woman that would be stepping into the gala tonight.
“I’m so proud of you, Kat. You’re so much stronger than you know,” Emerson says, her espresso-colored eyes a little glassy this time. “Now let’s go show ’em what you’ve got.”
Emerson’s confidence in me had me riding high until we got to the venue, the imposing high-rise giving way to cathedral ceilings, extravagant decorations, and chandeliers dripping in crystals. I thought I might be overdressed, but I fit right in as much as I stand out walking through the crowd.
“I’m supposed to go fawn all over Jace but just know I will be over in a heartbeat if you need me, all right?
” she asks, squeezing my hand as Jace saunters across the room toward us.
“Oh, he’s precious,” she coos and I hide my laugh behind my hand because I’m not sure that’s the reaction he’s going for.
“Ladies,” he says, brushing a kiss against Emerson’s cheek, “you both look stunning.”
“You look very handsome,” she says and he preens.
She’s right, he is adorable.
The thought is a fleeting one as my gaze strays past them to where Tom is standing in a tuxedo that has me nearly coming on the spot. The man should come with a warning sign.
His lips curve up on the side as his gaze rakes over me like a physical caress, and that’s not helping with my composure at all.
“Oh my gosh, look at you, so pretty!” Hazel coos as she walks up and stands at my side. “All ready to accept your big award.”
“You look great,” I respond, bypassing the rest of her comment and the strange sense of foreboding.
Get it together, Kat.
The unknown is the worst kind of stress, and even though I desperately want to believe that everything is going to be fine, I’m just not there yet.
I wonder if I’ll ever look back on this night and remember being a part of something life-changing, not just for myself but for the kids.
Or will this night always be sullied by the hatred of someone beyond my understanding.
“Did you just get here?”
“I did.” I laugh nervously, not recognizing half the people in this room. “I haven’t even gotten a drink yet.”
“That’s perfect; I haven’t either. What do you want? I can go grab it. I had to get something for my aunt earlier. You know how nervous she gets at things like this.”
Hazel waves her hand dismissively, but I remember a time when she’d been like that too. Apparently not anymore.