27. Bliss
Bliss
There’s a knock on my hotel door, and I hurry to peek through the peephole. If it’s housekeeping, I’ll tell them everything’s fine. If it’s a robber, well, I’m angry enough to throw a solid punch.
I sigh. That’s not even true. I’m not angry—I’m broken. I put myself out there with Zane. I told him I loved him. I laid it all on the line. For nothing.
I stand up on my tiptoes so I can get a better view through the peephole.
It’s Zane. My husband. He’s probably here to hand me divorce papers.
With unsteady hands, I unlock the chain and pull the door open. He barrels inside, scooping me into his arms and enveloping me in a warm, strong hug.
I do the only reasonable thing I can in the situation.
I cry. Like a baby.
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I bury my face into his shoulder and sob.
He kicks a boot out behind him and slams the door shut, then carries me farther into the hotel room.
“I’ve been out of my mind for you,” he says hoarsely. “I was so scared for you.”
His arms tighten around me, and he sinks onto the edge of the bed. I tuck my legs up to keep from bending them backward.
Zane adjusts his hold on me and presses his face into my hair.
It feels so good to be held by him.
Finally, he pulls back and clutches the side of my head, tilting my face up until I have to look at him.
“I love you, Bliss Eloise Madden. I love you. Do you understand?”
His blue eyes are so intense that I almost can’t look at them.
“I love you. I wanted to marry you.”
“You needed someone you could trust,” I say between sobs.
“Yes! And I trust you. You are the only person I want in my life. I just wasn’t ready to admit that I was falling for you.”
“But this isn’t happening. Not for real!” I exclaim as I climb off of his lap.
“It’s too late. There’s no going back. I’m madly in love with you.”
“But you can’t be!”
“Why not?” he asks as he stands from the bed.
“I am the side character!” I exclaim.
Zane looks at me in confusion. “What does that mean?”
“It means I don’t get the things that the main character gets. I don’t get to have all my dreams. Just parts of them.”
“I don’t think that’s true,” he says.
“You can’t possibly have driven all the way here just to tell me you love me.”
“Well, believe it, because I did,” he says as he takes a step closer. “I never thought I would find someone I could love the way I do you,” he says slowly. “I didn’t think it was possible.”
I suck in a sharp breath, and he crosses the room to me. So help me, if he touches me again, I’m a lost cause.
“But when you told me you loved me yesterday morning, I had hope for the first time in a long time. I laid awake all night, replaying the words … wondering if you had meant them or if it was an offhand comment. Because I wanted it to be real. I wanted you to love me. If you want to leave Pine Ridge, I want to come with you. I don’t even care what we’re doing.
I don’t want a life apart from you. If that means I have to pick up a new career, figure out something to do with my life, I will.
But I want you more than anything else.”
Now he’s going to make me cry.
“I didn’t want to scare you away. You have the emotional capacity of a goldfish.”
I press my lips together to keep from laughing … because he’s not wrong about that. I do have a hard time putting my emotions and feelings into words.
I’ve loved Zane for a long time. I’ve loved him longer than even I’ve admitted to myself.
The night I drove him home from his first wedding, we didn’t say any words.
He was too broken up. But he texted me, making sure I made it home safely.
That one little gesture in the middle of his own grief was my undoing.
It was the beginning of the end for me. The moment I started to fall for Zane.